FROM THE INSIDE

Every Girl Should Have Good Scents

2011-01-20T20:27:00.022-06:00

I am a perfume lover...Not just ANY perfume lover...I ADORE perfume, and I like many different kinds, though I tend to lean more towards Chanel, especially #19, and Jo Malone, (Pomegranite Noir is one of my favorites..)

Unfortunately like everything else, my taste tends to run a bit on the expensive side. Now how is a girl EVER going to support an expensive habit like that? Well, of course a girl like me comes up with an answer, one that I have been using for at least 10 years, maybe more.

I know that there are "discount" fragrance websites, stores, all about, but I can personally only vouch for one, and that is the website, "Scentiments".

Sure I still occasionally hit up Neimans for a "Chanel" special, or when I cannot live without some "Jo Malone" product, (as Scentiments unfortunately does not carry Jo Malone)
For the most part though, they do carry some wonderful scents and at fab prices, if you know how to shop, and/or get lucky enough to find what you want in stock.

You see, I'm afraid that this secret is not just my own..Dreadfully, many others dip their toe into this pond as well....Often I will go to order a perfume, and find that they are out of it. There is an option to leave your

email and be notified when they get the product in, but let me tell you, you have to act quickly or it will be gone once again. I also notice that at times, it takes them what appears to be a century to get a product back in.

If you are like me, (and of course, you should be), and willing to experiment on a scent that you have possibly never even smelled, you will love using this site. If I do order a scent that I have not smelled, like the one that I reviewed in my last blog entry, I make sure that it is a scent from a well know perfumery...i.e. Burberry, Boucheron, Bvlgari, Prada, Versace, etc...

Secondly, I consult the site to find one that is considered spicy and/or oriental or that contains y-lang y-lang, amber, and/or bergamot oil, as I tend to be attracted to these scents.

Those of you who are not familiar with "bergamot", will find it to be a lovely light citrus aromatic that blends

beautifully with ingredients.
Funny but doing a bit of research on "Bergamot" lead me to this...

What Is Bergamot Oil?

Bergamot oil is obtained from the peel of the bergamot, a citrus fruit grown mainly in Italy. The oil is used as a flavoring agent in foods and beverages and in various cosmetic products (for its citrus scent). It is also used to treat skin conditions, such as psoriasis or vitiligo (when applied to the skin), or to treat anxiety or depression (when used as aromatherapy).

Wow...and to think that I've spent all that money on anti-depressants, that don't work, when all

I had to do was soak in some hot water doused with bergamot!!??!!

Live and learn....Live and learn...

Not like we couldn't have figured that out! Ever notice the pleasurable "rush" that you get after
a whiff of some wonderful perfume or European chocolate?

Kudos to the genius that eventually figures out how to bottle those two...

Imagine how happy Tom Cruise would be?
(no more Anti-Depressants! MIND CONTROL...so much more effective..)

Not to mention Chocoholics...
(so much less fattening when you can just wear it!)

Sometimes I even go a step further, and consult Neimans online to see if they are selling the perfume that I'm considering ordering...Personally , if they sell it, that's enough for me to try it, owing to my long-time faith in Neiman Marcus's taste.

I also enjoy gloating about the price I'm going to pay for it. Now, you don't get the freebie samples or the lovely bag like you do if you purchase it at Neimans, but after a year's time, if you buy perfume like I do, you should have saved enough to afford a little trip to Neimans for tidbit or two.

Like that rationalization? (got lots more where that came from!)

Lastly, if they have the "tester" of a fragrance, look to see what that means. It will either mean that
it comes in a plain box, comes without a cap, or comes without a cap in a plain box.
The only time I buy a tester is if it comes in a plain box. I DO NOT buy a perfume without a cap, as
it will expose the perfume to air. Now if it comes in a plain box, who cares? Unless I am taking it on
a trip, I dispose of the box immediately anyway. (Actually the "plain box" turns out to be a very sturdy
box, perfect to pack in luggage!) The "tester" is, of course, the most economical way to go, and is OFTEN
what they are out of...The "tester" I assume, is one that they were going to put out at the store, but your
bottle never made it out there. That's how they can sell it for such a fantastic price. Again, a "tester" is where
you REALLY get a bargain. I have bought a tester without the original box, but otherwise exactly as new,
for $42.00 instead of $110.00 MANY TIMES.

The scents are all THE REAL THING...I repeat..

They are THE REAL THING.

No doubt where this is concerned, as I would not consider buying anything that wasn't.

So, there you have it...My secret, along with about a million others, is out.

www.scentiments.com

One more thing about Perfume (I never buy "Toilette" or "Cologne" Why would you want a watered-down version?)

You must use your Perfume in a timely manner. Keep it in a cool place and it should smell like new up
to a year. If it starts to get darker or change color, throw it out...
Look what I found while I was doing a bit of research....

"Older perfumes contain musk from other animals or ambergris, whale vomit. These fixatives are intended to make the perfume scent last longer"

"Older Perfumes", eh? Makes me want to rethink my "Joy"and "Shalimar" obsessions...I have a thing for
scents produced in the twenties...( Shalimar, Chanel #5, Joy, etc...)

How does one capture "whale vomit" anyway? I'm not going to think about this any further....

Wear Your Perfume.

Perfume is not just for a so-called "special occasion"

Everyday is a "special occasion"

Spritz on a bit when you emerge from the shower...

Go easy for work and crazy otherwise!

They sell both mens and womens cologne and perfume, and certain gift sets as well.
I love the miniatures for traveling...

I must add, that their shipping is extremely timely, except for perhaps holidays...(forget finding anything
around Valentines day or Christmas)

I would be remiss if I didn't share with you my NEW LOVE.

He came to me at Christmas time and I can hardly stand to be away from him.

His name is Kindle, but I call him "Kin"...

Yes, it was LOVE at first sight... (sight...LOL...get it? I crack myself up!)

He is never far from me, and is always the last thing I see before sleep...

He ROCKS!

https://kindle.amazon.com/

My Review of Lolita Lempicka 3.4 oz EDP spray TESTER for women by Lolita Lempicka

2011-01-20T16:40:00.001-06:00

Originally submitted at Scentiments

Eau de Parfum, With a liquorice accord comprising of aniseed, violet, vanilla and praline with a floral oriental harmony of ivy, iris, amarena, tonka bean, vetiver and musk makes it a rich fruity fragrance . Comes complete but in a plain box.

Oriental

By Class Act from Dallas on 1/20/2011

Pros: Sexy, Draws Compliments, Smells a bit like Angel, Great Smell, Long-Lasting, Sensual

Cons: Strong smell, Overpowering

Best Uses: Evening Use, Daily Use, Just a whiff for days

Describe Yourself: Classic Style

Fragrance Type: Powdery, Oriental/Spicy

I love it, but would not be for those that love a
subtle smell....Bottle a beauty...Strange atomizer
though..took a minute to get used to it..

(legalese)

Holiday excusion to San Francisco 2010

2010-12-20T22:35:00.003-06:00

One never tires of San Francisco. I especially love a holiday visit, as the city is filled with the most

beautiful Yuletide decorations. Our stay at the Westin St. Francis Hotel was a wonderful one, as expected.

A huge edible all sugar Castle that rotated with a train rounding the bottom of it, adorned one of the entrances, surrounded by a white gate and dozens of admirers, day and night.
The St. Francis is an amazing hotel with so many beautiful things that one must try to focus on one thing at a time, lest you might miss something. Everything is very old and extremely ornate, as the original St.Francis was built at the turn of the Century. The Great Earthquake and the fire that followed destroyed some of it as well as all of Union Square, but it was built again, in all of its glory two years later. Check it out at www.westinstfrancis.com, and if you ever get a chance to stay here, do so, and in the Main Bldg. which is the older historic one.

I enjoyed the city, as I always do, shopping at my favorite jewelry store for a new and unusual piece, visiting the wonderful little British tea shop that carries unique and whimsical gifts, a stop at the Ghiradelli Chocolate Shop in the Square, the sound of the trolleys, the beautiful and huge lit Christmas tree and ice skating rink at Union Square, the sights, smells, and sounds of the Wharf....

San Francisco is a treat...A visit there is on my list of guilty pleasures, and there's a lot there to love...I contend that once you have been there, you simply must return, time and time again....(think that I have a
former blog about returning to San Francisco...check it out...)

Now...I will give you my newest/and or updated restaurant reviews from one of the best Foodie destinations there is: Three restaurants to be exact..An updated review of "Slanted Door", and reviews of two new restaurants, "Wayfare Tavern" by Tyler Florence, and "Orson" by Elizabeth Faulkner...

I have dined at "Slanted Door" before, and though it was nice, I was not overwhelmed, and needed to be.

Glad that I gave this very popular establishment another shot, as this time it was absolutely sublime..

Amazing cocktails, BBQ spareribs, Daikon Rice cakes, Cellophane Noodles with Crab, and Caramelized

Shrimp, creating a delicious way to spend the evening. This is the kind of restaurant, especially on a Saturday

night, that one feels quite special dining in...There is definitely "magic" in the air, as well as dollars, for this is certainly not a dining destination for the frugal-hearted, but oh-so absolutely THE dining destination for the foodie...This is haute Vietnamese at its best, and I daresay better than you have or will ever eat it...

For a more economical version, there are a couple of "Out the Door" locations in town, with take out from

the same restaurateur, and though not all of the menu is available there, it is known as a very tasty alternative, and it can be eaten there or taken home, at a fraction of the cost. "Slanted Door" is located in the Embarcadero at the Ferry Bldg (more about that in a minute).
Just remember to get reservations early if you ever plan to dine there. (www.slanteddoor.com)

Another very delicious dinner was had at Tyler Florence's new restaurant, "Wayfare Tavern." Located in the Embarcadero Area, it simply does not disappoint. Other than the cocktails, which could use some

improvement, everything we tried there was outstanding. Loved the atmosphere, (old world tavern, duh),

it is quite popular, though they do take reservations. I recommend the fried chicken (brined and brilliant), the deviled eggs (capered and anchovied with love), popovers (who knew that these could actually be delicious?), brussel sprouts (mustard braised and ham hocked, so divine that I felt weak in the knees), oh, I could go on and on...Suffice it to say that everything that we tried was ambrosial...(www.wayfaretavern.com)

Finally, one of the best burgers EVER, along with their duck fat fries (yes, we have actually found a way to

make french fries even MORE sinful), can be had at "Orson", the new restaurant in the Soma area, opened by the famed pastry chef Elizabeth Faulkner (of "Citizen Cake", and many appearances on Food Network...You know, the one with the short, spiked platinum hair? No, not the loud one, the quiet one...Oh well...)

Her "Orson" is a very modern, futuristic space with sparse surroundings, and will not be everyone's "cup of tea" to speak, but is definitely mine...My Mother looked almost faint when we first arrived, as the ambiance was a bit um, "frightening" shall we say, though she appeared to feel much better after a strong scotch on the rocks...

There is a film, usually old, that plays on the huge wall behind the bar...When we arrived it was a video of

a fire in a fireplace, helping to give a "cozy" feel to all of the surrounding steel...Actually I felt quite at home, as it reminded me of so many places that I frequented in the 90s'...Remember that cold, white, steel, too contemporary for comfort, design of the 90s? That's exactly what Orson looks like...

The menu looks extraordinary, and I'm certain that it is all tasty, but we were all in the mood for the burger.
"Orson Burger with Duck Fat Fries" (grass fed beef, parmesan bun, truffle mayonnaise, cob relish, and
house made steak sauce...)

The description of a dish is an important job...Indeed, I do like this one, AND it also delivers!

To make sure that the duck fat fries are decadent enough, they are accompanied with a browned-butter

bearnaise...Ketchup just can't do these jewels justice...gotta have the browned-butter bearnaise to really feel

guilty, remorseful, and luxuriously happy...

When finished, one simply MUST remember that DESSERT is what has made our Elizabeth famous, so

to continue support for the chef, dessert is to be ordered..
Our favorite was "Guilt By Association", (hazelnut cake, salted malted milk chocolate ice cream, malted almond crunch)

The description is drool-worthy, don't you think?

Delicious and interestingly constructed, as all of her desserts are..Nothing here is as you have seen it

before...This goes for not only desserts but other items as well.
For example, her version of Caesar salad is literally an "explosion", due to the pop rocks hiding in the romaine, that "explode" with the dressing....
It's quite evident to me, that Ms. Faulkner believes in having fun while dining on her decadent cuisine, and I
am all for it....I shall return....(www.orsonsf.com)

One of the greatest things about San Francisco restaurants, at least those that I have visited, is that they
use only locally farmed, organic, and sustainable products. This makes such a huge difference in the taste of their food...One place that you must visit/experience is the Ferry Building.
Visiting the Ferry Building (especially on Saturday morning) is wonderful, as all of the farms are represented there, and touting all of their very best wares..Do not eat before you go, as noshing here is a glorious experience.
I've decided, that for a more economical foodie experience here, I could almost stay at a hotel near the Ferry building and eat there most of the time. Places like Boulette's Larder, Il Cane Rosso, Cowgirl's Creamery Artisan Cheese Shop, Acme Bread Company, and Bocccalone Salumeria, as well many others, could make for some delicious meals, and a bit less expensive way to go..(Right, like that's gonna happen...) Just say'n.
www.ferrybuildingmarketplace.com (a delicious destination)

I hope that you visit San Francisco if you never have, and return to it if you've already been, as it is one
of the most delightful places to spend a few days, especially for a holiday visit...

Way up there on my "I Don't Get It" List

2010-11-19T14:34:00.002-06:00

For years I was one of those people that didn't like cranberries.
When I was growing up, that jellied cranberry jarred monstrosity was all that I knew.

What in the world are you supposed to do with that stuff?
The consistency alone is enough to send me over the edge,
The "mouth feel" is a punishment.
The taste is simply not tart enough.

Having said that, it is probably still one of the best sellers during the holidays.
Amazing

It will forever stay on my "I don't get it " list.

Years later I started tasting the "real deal" or homemade cranberry sauce, with
actual cranberries in the sauce. You could see, taste, and FEEL the cranberries,
and it turned my cranberry world around.

Not only is it the easiest recipe in the world, (my "can't cook" sons could do it in their sleep),
but it is delicious and refreshing.
With added orange zest in a cut crystal bowl, it's not only tasty, but gorgeous to look at.

The recipe I am going to give you is not meant to replace our beloved homemade cranberry
sauce, but is a wonderful addition to the holiday table.
Frankly, this would make a wonderful relish/chutney all year round!

Fresh tasting, with an exotic punch, you'll find it's great not only with turkey, but
baked ham as well.

Served instead of bread and butter pickles, it's a versatile dish, that will "WOW"
your family and guests.
(I myself am a huge fan of the "WOW" factor.)

GIFT IDEA! (Make a batch or two and spoon it into wide mouth jars tied with a pretty ribbon.)
MARTHA would be PROUD!
Kept cold in the refrigerator, this will keep indefinitely.

The year that I made this, there were "oohs and aaahs" a plenty, and as I mentioned earlier,
it was absolutely the bomb on leftover turkey sandwiches. Use it as a relish, or if you wish, eat it
straight out of the bowl!
ENJOY!

Pickled Grapes with Ginger and Chilies

(from Salsas, Sambals, Chutneys, and Chowchows)

Makes about 6 cups

1 1/2 cups white vinegar
1 cup white sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
2 tbsp. crushed coriander seeds
1 tbsp. cinnamon
7 whole cloves
1 tbsp. salt
1 piece ginger the size of your little finger, peeled and cut into dime-size slices.
3 red or green jalapenos, finely diced, with seeds (trust me, it is not too hot)
4 cups seedless red and/or green grapes. (Red is best, I think)

In a large saucepan, combine the vinegar, sugars, coriander seeds, cinnamon,
cloves and salt.

Mix well, and then bring to a boil over moderately high heat.

Remove from heat and add ginger, jalapenos and grapes.

Mix thoroughly, and allow to stand for one hour.

This is a great one to make ahead a day or two, and let the flavor meld together,
but after just one hour, it's fresh tasting, and ready to rock the table...

Again, it keeps a long time kept covered and chilled.
I like to serve it closer to room temperature.

Feedback is always appreciated if you'd care to leave a comment.
I'd especially love to hear from those that give this a whirl...
Another recipe soon....

Nicole

Mini-Survival Kit for the Holidays plus a sumptuous recipe

2010-11-02T14:08:00.002-05:00

I find that we have only two ways to approach the holidays.

With RESENTMENT, because we don't get to enjoy them each on their own,
before Christmas peeks its little head out at the Department Stores, pushing us to
make gift decisions very, very early...(Hey, what happened to the real meaning of
Christmas?
These VULTURES!
Give me a break....etc.etc...)

OR

By completely EMBRACING it! Now by that I mean, you will have to leave
behind your traditional expectations and give yourself and your family some major
breaks. Here are some holiday truths that should help...

If you are not a crafty-type, you are not going to magically turn into Martha Stewart or Rosie O'Donnell.. (That's why there's a Hallmark store)

If you hate to cook, you will hate it even more. If you don't have time, you will have less....
(That's why there are caterers, restaurants serving and selling holiday meals, and Whole Foods Stores etc.)

If you cannot stand shopping malls, don't go...Sure they're pretty right now, but still crazy!
(Small independent shops have better gifts anyway. Better yet, buy it all on the web... get started now)

This last tip was one that I utilized one Christmas and it was a breeze..Did it all at Barnes&Noble.com.
That's right...Never visited one store! Everyone loved their gifts...truly!

You don't have to have a big tree.
(They have really cute tabletop ones these days...Okay, I guess if you have small kids..)

One year I just put a huge Father Christmas on the dining room table, scattered some pine scented candles
about, put an 8 inch "silver" tree on a shelf, and my boys were quite pleased!

If you have been laid off or just don't have extra money for whatever reason, try to come up with
something special that doesn't dip into your gas bill...

Now this one may be hard for some, but don't give up immediately. Open your mind...

Can you draw or paint? (an original drawing is kept forever)

Can you write a song and play it or record it? (quite special indeed)

Can you write a poem or story that will have specific meaning for the receiver?
Even a small little writing can mean a lot from a loved one.

If you have ANY artistic talent, this is the time to put it to use..

But what if you don't? (Hard to believe but...here's an idea...)

How about that beautiful little necklace of yours that your daughter has always admired?
Why wait until you're dead to hand it over?
(You can't see the smile on her face if you wait until then anyway...Think about it...)
Put it in a small velvet box with a ribbon and surprise her! (you know that you don't really wear it much anymore...)

How about some one's favorite treat that you rarely make?
My "Million Dollar Fudge" comes to mind, but I know that you and your family have their favorites...
It could be a very special loaf of bread or any much loved treat...
Whip it up when no one is around, and put it in a festive tin, or wrap it up in colorful plastic wrap with
a bow...
People eat that up...literally!

Hey, better yet, if you have kids or grandkids do the Christmas cookie thing...(Sadly, I'm not sure that
I ever did that...I'm sure that I MEANT to ...Hmmm....Well there ya go...You can produce holiday "guilt" even years later if you allow yourself!)

Note to self...Do Not Allow!

I truly feel that a lot of what we get Hyper and Disappointed in ourselves about, has EVERYTHING to
do with our own illusions of what the holidays should look and FEEL like...(reinforced by every single
item in the media...Remember...they are ALL advertisements in one form or another...They need to sell
to you...It is their business...)

These hard to manufacture illusions may come from one's own childhood experiences, magazines, or films we've seen and grown up with...(Not to mention Martha Stewart's Crafty Christmas Shows and Food Network Holiday Specials...)
Hey, I love them too, but there's an abundance of time, money, and help that produces all of that
enchantment...

For me it is comparative with the trap that we allow ourselves to fall into when we are getting married
and having the "Big Wedding"..
We reference all of what we have seen or dreamed about, and WHEN and IF it doesn't line up as we have
perceived it, the disappointment sets in...

I dearly love movies, books, magazines, and fantasizing, but one must resist the temptation of buying into
the whole "Disneyesque" version of life...
These images will always lead to a let down, or worse, you'll tell yourself that you didn't do what you could have done to make it really "perfect"....

(A note about "Disneyesque" life...Everyone should visit Disney World at least once in their life to enjoy the
true "Disneyesque" experience. One is never too old, and I feel that the older you are, the more you appreciate it ..You certainly deserve a complete and total "too good to be true" fantasy...I say leave the kids home, and go and delight in it yourself....but then that's just me...)

VERY IMPORTANT STATEMENT:

Holiday Depression is a serious epidemic, and I feel that a lot of it stems from unrealistic expectations.

Having said all of this, if you find yourself in a position to turn your holidays into a world of homemade crafts,
glistening wreaths, glass balls, silver linings, tin soldiers, golden angels, velvet ribbons, nutmeg candles, along with a kitchen filled with apple cider simmering on the stove, cheese straws dancing on candy cane plates,
layers of smoked turkey and cheddar circling a silver platter, and champagne bubbling in crystal tulip goblets, well...
THAT'S OKAY (and we'll all be over for the party on December 17th!)

I will be posting recipes suitable and delicious for the holiday season the next few weeks.
This week I will start with a simple, yet elegant recipe from the late and great culinary master,

Craig Claiborne. God rest his culinary genius soul.

Sweet Potato Puree with Walnuts and Ginger

Serves 6 -8

6 to 8 sweet potatoes (about 3 lbs) organic is best
1/2 cup ginger preserves (look for it at gourmet groceries or order it online)
3 tablespoons dark rum
2 tablespoons butter
1 cup chopped walnuts (preferable black walnuts)
3/4 cup whole milk

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Put the potatoes in a baking dish and place in the oven.
Bake 1-2 hours, depending on the size of each potato. Press with the fingers and remove each potato as it becomes soft.
When all the potatoes are cooked, let them rest
until cool enough to handle. Split each potato in half and scoop out the flesh.
Put the flesh through a fine mesh or a potato ricer. (you should seriously have a potato ricer as they are so cool...especially for mashed potatoes)
There should be about 3 cups. Put this into a
saucepan.
Combine the preserves and the rum in a small
saucepan. Bring to the boil, stirring. Add this to the potatoes. Add the butter, walnuts and milk;
heat to the boiling point, stirring.(watch and stir
faithfully, so as not to burn...)
The recipe contains no salt, so at the end, I would taste, to make sure that the black walnuts added enough salt, if not, I would not hesitate to add a
bit to taste.
I can SO see this mixture piped from either a
piping bag, or a large Ziploc bag with a small
snip on one corner (this always works...)
You could pipe this mixture decoratively around
the platter of sliced turkey, ham, or whatever
meat you were serving...
You could also just serve it as you would mashed
potatoes...
Why you could even do your best Martha Stewart impression, and pipe it into hollow orange halves! (somebody stop me!)

Delicious!

Falling Apart You Say? What Now!

2010-10-26T01:47:00.001-05:00

Well today it's official.
I'm
falling
apart.

I guessed
this might happen
(Yes, right from the start)

Surprised you ask?
Why no,
of course not...

It's why I don't visit
the Doctor
a lot.

While I do like
to work with them
(and God knows I do)

The truth about me
from their lips,
turns mine blue

For little can shock
a girl like me,
who avoids
Doctor visits
like the plague,
you see.

Well the pain
broke me down..
Had to visit a clinic

Which was
no small feat,
for a healthcare cynic

Come to find out,
it appears that my knee
that's failed me
for months now,
is lost
and unseen

How on earth did it vanish,
(is there a "missing knee" site?)

Might there be a way
to find it?
Or must
bone spurs
be my plight?

Yes, I'm told
a replacement
is the only way,
I can live
without pain
(at least that's what they say)

I MUST be too
young
for such a
serious
endeavor.

(Besides, not my style...
overdone, hardly clever)

And there's no guarantee...
Why I could
actually expire!

From a pulmonary embolus
that explodes
like a tire....

Didn't even
get my breasts done
(they'd have really looked great!)

Nope,
fears that it
might kill me,
Left me with my
small boobs fate.

So for now
I've decided
I'll just
try my luck,
with shots
and pills
and all that
schmuck.

I guess
it's just inevitable
that our bodies
break down...

Oh, and
limping's just not sexy...
not in scrubs
or evening gowns..

Written with sincerity, truthfulness, and paranoia...

Nicole 10/26/10

HALLOWEEN II AND MY CREEPY POEM FOR YOU

2010-10-01T23:14:00.021-05:00

I should SO be asleep...

Why I've chosen to cruise the Internet and catch up on my Blog, instead of getting the essential

4 hours of "I've gotta get up and go to work at 5am " sleep, is beyond any explanation.

I DO love my sleep, though at times, I feel just as Ernest Hemingway did...

"I love sleep...My life has a tendency to fall apart when I'm awake"

I hope that some of you (my loyal followers) are still out there...

Surely not ALL of you have lost interest.

(though I could hardly blame you)

As not only am I a sporadic blogger,

I'm not always in my foodie mode.

Honestly, as the writer, I strive to avoid prosaic, monotonous material ,

for fear of not only boring my reader, but myself as well.

I've not lost interest, it's just that sometimes I go through "spells"

(spells?)

Feel too involved/busy, living my highly predictable schedule of work, sleep, read, and eat.

At times I'm convinced that the

"creative genes" have vanished...

or worse yet...

that they were never there to begin with.

Introspection is certainly healthy,

but years of it can get old,

know what I mean?

Let's move on...

In Celebration of this ghostly season,

I have written a new little ditty that's just for you....

"JOURNEY BACK TO SALEM"

A lingering feeling

surrounds me tonight..

A chill in the air

for wings to take flight...

A sobering gloom

like an unexplained fear...

Just what could it be

that would

follow me here?

It looms in the darkness,

Like a lantern, it glows..

Feels so familiar,

something I know?

In my darkened abode

I'm watching a film

I've seen once before

Filled with horror

and gore

A" Serial Killer,"

a "Sicko,"

a "Clone"

The ending's predictable,

already known..

I'm drifting towards

dreamland,

to a place I remember...

I was there

a few days

just shy of November

It was Halloween week

and in Salem I found,

a place like no other

world famous, renowned

for the huge celebrations

that October brings.

And now I'll return

to discover new things

Ignoring the prickling

at the base of my neck..

down my shivering spine...

(Must get a health check)

Strange thoughts scatter

aimlessly

inside of my head

"So glad you're returning!"

a distant voice said

(the witches' necks

hung on soft swaying trees,

then burned all together

and cast out to sea)

On streets and in shops

Potions ready to sell

And magic dust lingers

with a rusty old smell

Inside their cloaks

in back rooms

of old stores

are the pouches of venom

Hidden safely in drawers

They'll lure you inside

"such delightful tricks"

and you try to resist it

(cause you figure it's shtick)

Still you find yourself

following this

black hooded creature

whose smooth tongue

reminds you of a

well rehearsed

preacher

There are SPELLS

for everything

one could desire.

though some are unpleasant,

(like lynching and fire)

Some Spells are enchanting,

and others just garish

(and those less successful

have caused folks to perish!)

This is one Holiday

you won't soon forget...

("the shivering spine..

the prickling neck")

"Come close to me...

Turn around!...

Now closer" he said...

The Potion-Filled Vials

entice you to pay

for Hexes and Vexes

that lead you astray

"It's here in my pocket

for just a small fee...

Not just smoke and mirrors!

It's MAGIC, you'll see..."

Blank stares and Whispering

Where Merriment should be...

(No sign of Pumpkins, one normally sees)

The sky starts to darken

and a loud shuffling sound...

Makes me look round the corner,

and guess what I found!

THE ZOMBIES ARE BACK!

it's the season, you know...

(these Guys really know how

to PUT ON A SHOW!)

I should have guessed it...

(that frightening sight, of

CREATURES THAT NO LONGER LIVE IN THE LIGHT)

Quick!..

Lower Your Voice,

or THEY'LL HEAR

what you said

Don't look,

and keep still,

they'll

know

you're

not

DEAD.....)

Nicole

Oct. 2010

An Artist in the Family

2010-07-18T11:45:00.005-05:00

No, that would not be me...I am the woman who still draws stick figures after all of these years...(though I do feel that my stick figures have CHARACTER!)

My eldest son is very artistic, though he has never developed a keen interest in it, (music making is his obsession, as was his Mother's for the first 40 years of her life...)

My one and only sister, has always enjoyed personal creativity. It started when we were young...I wanted to go BUY something for a special occasion, and she wanted to MAKE something...

For my parent's 20th Anniversary, my sister and I gave them 20 different gifts...some bought, some made....This would have never happened had it not been for my sister, who found great joy, and still does, in creating something original....

My sister is very diverse in her creativity, having written plays, directed and acted in theater productions, teaching high school and junior high theater classes, co-owning a catering company in the past, and on and on....

For awhile now, she has been creating art in the form of what is called "Domino Art"...

Yes, that's right, like the Dominoes that people used to play with...The ones that you and I may have set up in a curvy row, and when done, tipped the first one to watch the whole row collapse, one by one...(Reminiscent of the "Rockettettes" in New York. They incorporate a falling dominoes type of dance during their Christmas show...)

My sister's art incorporates Dominoes mixed with other mediums, making some very interesting and unique pieces...

I will stop and not go on and on, as everyone has their own opinion when it comes to art.

I will simply give you the website, and let you decide for yourself...

http://www.charlottegiles.com/

I will write again soon. I am working full time at one hospital and prn at another, and very busy, but happy....I have planned a trip to Boston the week of Halloween....(Yes, I DO plan to see the "Zombie Parade" again, as once is simply not enough!)

Let Them Eat Cake with a Wee Personal Scentiment

2010-07-06T14:05:00.016-05:00

"You must take a lover" they Said.
(I'd much rather go back to Bed)

At least in my dreams
I'm happy, it seems.

Untouched by the
post-wedded "Dread"

It's been disappointingly Clear
I'm not meant to be some one's "Dear"

But it turns out, you see,
to be JUST FINE with me!

(And the audience stands up to Cheer)

......................................................................

Well now...That was inspiring wasn't it?

You can always depend on me to add hearts and flowers
to any situation at hand....

(cut to recipe...)

And now for an old fashioned, easy, and sumptuous cake for all.

Served plain or enhanced with fruit and whipped cream, or adorned
with a scoop of your favorite vanilla ice cream, you just can't lose
with the ALL AMERICAN POUND CAKE.

(I'm an "eat it plain person, myself" or MAYBE with a scoop of Blue Bell)

I was inspired to post this because it is the week of July 4th, but even
more so, because it is baked differently than other cakes.

It's quite Southern, lighter than most pound cakes, (due to the shortening),
and is a recipe that James Villas acquired from a very old Southern Lady,
who told him that the recipe had been in her family for generations.

It's unusual because unlike most cakes, it starts in a COLD OVEN!

Follow the recipe to a "T", and it will turn out beautifully every time....

(I always suggest getting an oven thermometer to make sure that your oven
is the right temperature...Mine was 25 degrees off...Always a good idea to do
if you decide to BAKE anything....)

"Cold Oven Pound Cake"

3 cups sugar

2 cups butter, softened

8 Tablespoon vegetable shortening

5 large eggs

3 cups all purpose flour

1 cup whole milk

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 teaspoon almond extract

1 teaspoon lemon juice

Grease a 10 inch tube pan with some butter, and set aside.

In a large mixing bowl, cream together the sugar, butter, and shortening.

Add eggs, one at a time, beating until well blended

Alternately, add the flour and milk, and beat until the batter is smooth.

Add the two extracts and the lemon juice and mix until well blended.

Scrape the batter into the prepared pan, and place in the center of the oven.

Heat the oven to 325 degrees F, and bake until a cake tester or knife blade, inserted

into the center, comes out clean.

This should take about 1 1/2 hours.

Turn the cake out on a rack, and let cool completely.

10-12 servings

FOR THE LOVE OF "SMALL BITES" or "TIDBITS"

2010-05-12T13:40:00.003-05:00

As far back as I can remember, before we knew what "Tapas" were, we, that is my friends and family, were always more enamored with appetizers, grazing on small plates, or casually noshing on small "bites"....

We preferred it to the large holiday dinners, and for many years on Christmas Eve, we looked forward to our favorite Christmas treat, which was an evening filled with different appetizers and Champagne....We always had too much food, as my Mother would always point out, but it never went uneaten as we all headed home with small bites of "this and that" to nosh on for a few days to come...

I had dinner out last night with a couple of my oldest friends...We have known each other since High School, and have what seems to be a million years of memories. We don't get to see each other as often as we would like, but when we do, there is nothing that we cannot share with each other, as though we had just seen each other.

As we perused the menu, we had so much to catch up on, that we could not be bothered with devoting much attention to what we wanted to order. The THIRD time that the waiter came by the table, he suggested the sharing of a small plate of marinated Mediterranean Olives, which was accompanied by almonds and garlic rubbed grilled toasts.....The pairing of this small bite with my lovely glass of light Chardonnay was perfection.

I have been working like a DOG for the last couple of weeks...(Why do we say working like a "DOG", when all I ever see most dogs do is sleep?)

I greatly looked forward to my few days off this week to sleep late, read, and try some new recipes or make them up....These activities always relax and please me (especially the part about sleeping late, because I am now getting up at 4AM!!! to go to work...)

Now that I AM working very steadily, I grocery shop, but don't do a lot of cooking because I am not around as much. Hence the need to buy smaller quantities of food that is good for on the go..

Now when I refer to food like this, I mean sumptuous Goat Cheese, French Feta Cheese, Marinated Greek and Green Olives, Peppers, loaves of Rosemary Seven Grain Bread, Sourdough small loaves, good Olive Oil, Garbanzo Beans and Tahini for Hummus, Greek Yogurt and English Cucumber for Tsatziki, Cans of my Favorite Tuna, Lemons, Garlic, Greens, Chicken Breasts, and all sorts of fresh Herbs....

With these fresh ingredients in the kitchen, I can whip up just about anything that I might be interested in making, or grab a quick snack so as not to have to make a "big deal" out of a meal...

This morning I wanted to take something over to my parents house for them to enjoy....Maybe something that they have never eaten and hopefully would find to be delicious...

Out of the refrigerator I grabbed log of Chevre' (natural goat cheese), a small amount of some French Feta, and a bit of Cream Cheese....I also pulled out the last of some walnuts, toasted them, and in the veggie drawer grabbed the herbs that I had on hand, some Dill, Tarragon, and Italian Parsley.....At this point I settled on a jar of "Party Olive ANTIPASTO" a product made in Greece and manufactured by the "PEPLOPONNESE" company...It contained olives, green peppers, cauliflower, carrots, and red peppers...PERFECT...(Believe it or not, this jar was found in the Grocery aisle where the olives are at my local KROGER...Really! Just gotta look for these goodies....)

I decided that a great cheese spread made with this Antipasto could be very delicious, and absolutely divine on some homemade CROSTINI....So easy....

I happened to have a loaf of small rounded Sourdough bread, as well as the end of a Rosemary Seven Grain Loaf bought at La Madeline....The Bread slices were the perfect size, but had they been too large, they could have been easily sliced in half....More about the making of the Crostini later.....For now back to the.....

"MEDITERRANEAN WING IT CHEESE SPREAD"

In your food processor, clean and throw in a handful of each and every fresh herb you have or want to use (be sure to take off any stems...)...Throw in a peeled garlic clove or two...Dash a bit of Extra Virgin Olive Oil in and process until it is finely chopped.

Add all of the cheese, room temp, and process until combined. Add about 1/2 to 3/4 cup of the Antipasto along with a little marinade (but not a lot, as it is quite salty)....Grind some pepper into the processor bowl, as well as a bit of cumin, smoked paprika, and cayenne (if you have it, which you should since it is FAB in just about everything but chocolate cake....)

Turn on the processor and process until really smooth almost like a "mousse"....After this is done, add the toasted walnuts (I used about 1/4 to 1/2 cup)....Turn the processor on and off a couple of times or so, as you want the nuts to still be intact, though not large....

TASTE...

ALWAYS taste your food...What does it need? Too salty? Add a bit more cream cheese...Bland? I doubt it will be, but if so, you could add some additional marinated olives, or just regular green or Kalamata olives....(Again, these are very salty, so go easy...)

Fill a crock jar with the spread and if giving away, tie a pretty ribbon around it...(this is a great idea, and some day I will buy ribbons just for this very reason....As for now, the jar will remain naked....)

THE CROSTINI

Oven preheated to 350 degrees...

Take your largest cookie sheet and line it with parchment...Place the small sized bread, (Sourdough, French, or Italian is best), on the sheet....Cut larger sized bread in half if you wish, though I think that the smaller rounded "toasts" are the most attractive...

Sprinkle or brush each piece with Olive Oil....Bake for around 7 minutes or so, but watch carefully after 5 minutes...They don't have to be brown in color, just toasted like a large crouton....

As you pull the crostini from the oven, and while they are still warm, rub each piece with a peeled garlic clove....

Put them on a wire rack to completely cool, then store them in a large plastic ziploc until ready to serve....

I hope that you will try this Spread, as it is quite tasty, or at least gather some inspiration from the recipe, and give it a try yourself with your own choice of cheeses, herbs, and other ingredients....You could do a roasted pepper one or do one with the roasted tomatoes that you have made yourself....(i.e. see post before this one...mine were all gone!)

This is the kind of cooking that I love to do, and find to be the most creative...A bit of this, a bit of that, and who knows? You might be the creator of something amazing! I think that one of the keys is to keep you refrigerator stocked with the freshest of ingredients, the best that you can afford in terms of quality, and items that you and you family/friends like....

As Summer shows its heated little head, especially here in Texas, glasses of Chilled Wine, Lemonade, and "Small Bites" sound more and more the answer to mealtime...

I hope that you will enjoy this addition to your favorite "Tapas," or as my sister and I called them growing up, "Tidbits"....

DELICIOUS Oven Roasted Tomatoes (or how working brings out the Culinary in me...)

2010-05-02T22:42:00.011-05:00

Feels great to work again...As I told my son, I missed taking care of my "Peeps"....

I am working so much (PRN, alas no full time position yet), at two different hospitals....I have to be careful not to "overbook" myself, as I did last week...This was my first day off for over a week...

After sleeping for most of the morning, I emerged an energy filled woman, ready to watch a couple of films that I recorded awhile ago, and cook at the same time...(have always loved to do this...)

I am feeling SO much happier since I am back to work, and when I am happy, I always feel like cooking...I also HATE anything frozen and/or basically anything less than wonderful....I have been known to cook, as I did last week, 6 different things in one day, just so we would have good things to eat in our fridge..

My son has been on a "working out and only eating healthy things" regimen for awhile now, so I do try to keep this in mind when I am planning what I will prepare...

I made a recipe today that was not only completely delicious, but easy and fairly economical...It filled my apartment with the smells of an authentic Italian kitchen, and that in itself was lovely....
You can make this all year long, and would be especially helpful in the winter, when tomatoes are really tasteless....

Oven Roasted/Dried Tomatoes

You can do this with big tomatoes, cut into quarters, but I like doing it with cherry tomatoes....They could be put on top of a pizza, scattered on top of a salad, used as a topping on a sandwich or panini, tossed with pasta, used with mozzarella, goat cheese, or French feta cheese for a great bruschetta, or just on their own...They are seriously addictive and versatile....

Oven 225 degrees

Use parchment paper on a big sheet pan...(If you don't use parchment, just make sure that you spray the pan or coat with olive oil, but parchment makes it so easy...)

Wash, dry, and half the cherry tomatoes...(about 2 pints or more if your pan will hold it..)

Place on large baking sheet, and scatter unpeeled garlic cloves around the tomatoes...

Drizzle all with olive oil (extra virgin is best, but the regular would do...)

Sprinkle with Kosher Salt (don't overdo that), and cracked pepper...

Take whatever dried Italian spices that you have and mix them together...(I used basil and oregano...Fennel would be nice if you had it...)

You will need 2 teaspoons of very fine spices, so take more than that, and with clean hands, use your fingers and turn the spices into a very fine powder...(If you have a mortar and pestle, it would be perfect for this, but I do not...)
Sprinkle 2 teaspoons of the finely ground spices over the tomatoes...(I used a little cayenne as well for a kick...)

Bake these for about 3-4 hours, checking them after 3 hours, as you do not want them black all over...I cooked mine for 3 1/2 hours, but it will depend on their size...If you were to half and cook the grape ones, it would take less time....

These will keep for a few days, kept in a covered jar or container, covered in olive oil....Not sure that it will last that long though...The roasted garlic can be stored right along with the tomatoes...
These are perfect to make on your next day off...Make more rather than less....Enjoy

Let's get all dressed up and go shopping!!!

2010-04-01T03:55:00.008-05:00

Dont' you just love to shop? Oh, I don't mean a crowded mall with sale tables overflowing with unrecognizable items, (it reminds me of my laundry room, you almost have to hire a detective to find that ONE pair of red pants...)

No, I speak of practically vacated malls, like during the weekdays, where you feel like a million bucks and EVERYONE working asks if you need help....Of course my favorite kind of shopping is in small intimate shops that are rather antiquated in form, and lie on Cobblestone Streets with Gas Lamps...That would be Charles Street in Beacon Hill in Boston...Lovely...Another great shopping memory lies in the heart of the historic district of Charleston, South Carolina...Blocks and Blocks of antique shops, perfume shops, and basically everything "girly"...You gotta love it...Not to mention the incredibly restored mansions with their perfectly furnished pieces that are an art form in themselves...My very favorite places to shop are Art Museum Shops, where they go out of their way to provide unique and hard to find items, from art and jewelry, to music and even furniture...Even when I cannot afford to buy much, these places give a breath of fresh air, and I rather enjoy fantasizing what I would buy if I could...Of course sometimes when I am doing well, I DO buy, mostly jewelry, great stuff that is one of a kind....Hmmm..Just thinking of it puts a smile on my face......Yeah, this pup's in for a great day!

"Pimento Cheese Fit For A Queen" and Tzatsiki Sauce that's "Fit" and Fabulous

2010-03-19T02:25:00.020-05:00

You all have probably wondered what a "once again" unemployed girl, who is on the verge of yet "another" nervous breakdown, (yawn...) does at 2:30 in the morning..

Sleep? Heavens no! Way too predictable. and I just can't afford that kind of a reputation at this point in my life....

The answer is...I'm cooking! But of course....

I'm either crying or cooking, and tonight it's
cooking.... (well SOMETIMES I laugh...last night at 2:30 in morning, I was watching the recent remake of "The Importance of Being Earnest", and cracking up at lines like, "When I'm sad, I refuse everything, except food and drink"....As you
all know, I adore Oscar Wilde...(See previous post from way back...)

Actually I've had quite the productive day where the culinary arts are concerned...

(too bad it doesn't pay, but then a girl can't have everything...)

I made some delectable Tzatsiki sauce today, and felt that I needed to balance that low fat

regimen by following it with a high fat recipe tonight...hence the:

"Pimento Cheese Fit For A Queen"

1/2 Lb Sharp White Cheese
1/2 Lb Cheddar
Shred cheese by box grater....
Mix these cheeses together...

2-7 oz cans pimentos (drained)
Put those on plate and mash with fork to a pulp
Add to cheese

1 to 2 Jalapenos with ribs and seeds (depending how hot you want it) minced finely
Add to cheese mixture

Add small amount salt, and small or larger amount garlic powder, cayenne pepper, black pepper, dry mustard-"Coleman's" is best...(all to taste, go small then add more as desired)

Add Mayo (Hellman's or homemade) to bind...Will take at least one cup or more...(should
be spreadable and NOT stiff)
Do not skimp on this...

(Reminder...This is not a low fat recipe, as no respectable Southern recipe is....)
Best mixed with a fork....

Will require a bit of mixing and patience...
Want everything very incorporated...

Finish with shots of Tabasco and a little Worcestershire sauce...
Mix well...

Put in crocks or covered dish in Refrigerator, and let it stay there for at least 3-4 hours or overnight before serving....(of course, that is after you get yourself some!!!)

Makes two really good sized pint sized crocks (I like to use the pickling jars with lids)

Consider giving one away and keeping the other...(to some lucky friend/family...no foes, unless you want them to become friends...)

Good for one full week refrigerated... So good, you're gonna have to find someone to SLAP...
(I, for one, never thought that "YO MAMA" was a good choice...just say'n)

Notes on Recipe...Of course you could add some finely chopped Italian Parsley, Smoked Paprika, Onion, Juice from the Pimentos or Dilled or Bread and Butter Pickles, finely minced Garlic..

Actually just the original recipe is best, I think

Could leave out the Jalapeno and Tabasco....(pity, though)

Serving Suggestions...On crackers, ripe tomato slices, top of burgers, stuffed celery, or traditionally, which is on white bread (the kind that nobody buys anymore...)

Now for the Tzatsiki Sauce....

Hard to believe that it's healthy and low fat because it's just too good for that!

My Tzatsiki Sauce

2 cups of plain yogurt ( If you can afford the Greek Yogurt you do not have to drain)

I used regular plain yogurt and put it in a couple of coffee filters in a stainer over a bowl in
the refrigerator and left it there to drain overnight... (doesn't actually take all night)

In the morning it is nice and thick like the consistency of thick Sour Cream...

2 regular cucumbers, peeled, seeds removed, grated, and squeezed dry with some
kitchen towels to remove all moisture (just as you would do with defrosted spinach)

Combine these two ingredients, then add 2-3 cloves of finely minced garlic, a bit of salt and pepper, about a tablespoon or two of finely minced fresh dill, the juice of 1/2 a lemon, a dash of white or red wine vinegar, a dash of cayenne pepper, and enough extra virgin olive oil to suit your consistency preference....

You can replace the dill with fresh mint if you desire...Both are wonderful....

Serving Suggestions..

Great with pita bread, cut up veggies, as a healthy substitute for sour cream in a baked potato, drizzled over roasted potatoes and other veggies, and any grilled lamb or chicken breasts (marinate lamb and/or chicken first in extra virgin olive oil, lemon juice, oregano, garlic, salt, and pepper, and only about 1/2 hour before you grill in the case of the chicken breasts, or they will cook in the lemon juice...can marinate lamb longer...)

"Lamb Burgers" are wonderful with topped with Tzatsiki....

Think that I might have that recipe posted either on this blog or on foodbuzz.com under "sautegrillfryfunnygirl"....

This sauce is so versatile, I'm sure that you will come up with delicious ways to eat it...

Well...Happy Eating.

Hope you enjoy these recipes...

When I come out with a recipe for sauteed acorns garnished with crisp fried crickets , you'll know I'm in trouble...

See you in the "Soup Lines"...(bet they won't have any Tzatsiki or Pimento Cheese there...)

Hmmph...

Oh and why the cowgirl picture?

Just a rare occasion when the Texan in me shows her true roots, which reminds me...

Roots look horrifying when you're unemployed....

If my hairdresser saw me, he would pretend that we weren't acquainted...

Uh oh....here comes the crying again...

How Boston can save a girl's life

2010-02-04T10:42:00.002-06:00

I suppose that's overdoing it a bit...It seems to be my chosen haven for when everything is great and when everything is not so great. Yes, here I am several months later, so terribly sporadic concerning my entries, and I do apologize for that. I will say, though, in my defense,that I just woke up last week for the first time in 7 months.

I had NO IDEA until I was forced to resign from my full time night shift job a little over a week ago, that I had been living and walking around in a "zombie state" (somewhat reminiscent of those I encountered in the Salem zombie walk awhile back...hopefully, those that have been avid readers of this blog do recall one of my finer moments around a year ago....)

It was not until about a week after from the day that I was asked to resign from my position, (experiencing large doses of anger, shock, resistance, horror, outrage, and sadness), while trying to initially recover for a few days in Boston, that I realized one afternoon that I had this very foreign, yet positive feeling coming from inside of me...It was something I could not initially put my finger on...

In no time at all, I realized, that in fact, it was that I was AWAKE!

For those of you that have smoked, and then quit, it was exactly what one goes through soon after you quit smoking...Suddenly you feel so much better...Why, you didn't even know that you felt badly! What a surprise...Well, that's how being awake felt...So nice for a change...

My struggles with this job were made possible by not only experiencing a completely new hospital/staff/and work that I didn't normally do (intensive care for brain injuries), but I could have survived that and eventually thrived. I knew that, and I suppose that is what hurt a great deal...The anger and outrage portion was brought on by the fact that my newly promoted manager, who had never managed before, and didn't care for me before the promotion, spent the last 8 weeks of my job, "mentoring" me in the ICU policies and procedures. It's interesting that you get to a point in life where you tell yourself that people aren't really evil, as surely there is just a communication breakdown that can be remedied...

WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!

I won't go on and on and belabor this point, let's just say that what we had on hand was a little "Hitler" that had been physically abused by his Daddy as a boy, and also didn't particularly like women that spoke up for themselves when being tortured and emotionally abused....(uh...that would be me...)

So, that would be it, in a nutshell, as they say...It didn't take a few days in Boston for me to realize that this was seriously for the best, as I was beginning to wear down quickly as the last few weeks went by...

It was WONDERFUL for me to spend a few days in Boston again...Helped me put things into some perspective...I needed to get away from home, from the constant calls (especially those "well meaning" friends? from work, who I'm sure wanted all the gory details...I did not answer the phone...No one there got the "gory details"...)

So....Now here I am...A second time in the last 12 months without a job...A girl who has kept a full time steady job for 29 years and does not get used to being unemployed...Why I can't even apply for "unemployment" because I "resigned" (which I had to do because of my License or I would not work again in Texas...)....

I know that I will find something or maybe a couple of things at some point...As much as I thought that I enjoyed working nights, I had no idea how much better I felt when I came off of them...Definitely a love/hate relationship with night shift work...Money is so much better...Don't have to deal with the problem of not being able to get to your patient due to a multitude of others around you (physicians, OT, PT, etc)....Quiet on nights, I like that....Like being awake also....Don't like not being able to wake up on my days off....I have done NOTHING but either work or sleep for the last 7 months...Even when I went out for town, which I did often, I could hardly stay awake...My God, I have almost seen nothing that is up for the Academy Awards this year! That in itself tells the story, as I am a film freak....(Did see "An Education" while in Boston, and "A Single Man" last night....both marvelous....)

You can imagine the state that I was in while in Boston....Trying to get away to my favorite place and "chill" after what has been probably the worst 7 months of my life...(and that includes my last marriage...yeah...THAT'S how bad it was...)

Here I am, gleefully happy, as I have just stepped out of "THE TRIDENT BOOKSTORE", one of my favorite places in Boston....I have spent a couple of hours inside, roving through the most interesting books, books that one cannot find at Barnes and Noble, etc. There are also very interesting and happy people inside, some browsing as I was, some meeting socially for a meal and/or a snack at the Trident restaurant that serves decadent looking desserts, smoothies, soups, etc. It is a PERFECT January day (for a Texas girl anyway)...Earlier that morning I am walking, eating, and mostly window shopping in my beloved Beacon Hill on the cobblestone streets, with the gas lamps glowing, when all of the sudden, the beautiful and graceful flakes of snow begin to fall....I am inside having lunch at this very quaint little shop, and as I look out on the snow coming down, every so gracefully, I have to take a deep breath, as I am overcome with happiness (a feeling somewhat foreign to me at this time...)

Walking in the falling snow up and down those streets is like a perfect dream...Only problem is, eventually your hair is so wet, you have to duck inside somewhere....This brings me back to walking out of the Trident Bookstore. I've had probably the best day I've experienced for too long to remember...All of my favorite things in one day....As I walk out to stand under the awning to wait for my ride, I immediately see a little woman, humped over, on the phone, and she eyes me up an down quickly, and tells her caller that she must go, and that she will call her later...This little bent over, dark stringy haired, crooked nosed woman, is a shoo-in for the part of Hansel and Gretal's witch....I'm looking away, because I SO don't want to be bothered, but NO, not gonna happen....She comes towards me, extends her hand, and introduces herself. As she is still looking "around me up and down", she exclaims that "I MUST do a reading for you".....I decline and tell her that I'm sure that there are many others that would appreciate a "reading", but she tells me, "NO! I will NOT do readings on just anyone...My Grandmother, my Mother, we all have the "gift" and we do not abuse it! You don't understand, you NEED a reading, and I MUST do one on you"...I SO wanted just to give this woman money and say bye bye, but instead I told her that I didn't want a reading, as they tended to scare me, and I did not feel like being scared today.....She succumbed to my wishes, and we shook hands and she told me "God Bless You", and I said, "God Bless You Too", and sighed that it was over...She walked a few steps to the Trident door, opened it up, and then turned her twisted little body around, and spoke in an ominous tone as she warned.....

"BEWARE...THERE ARE THOSE THAT WANT TO INVADE YOUR LIFE...THERE IS TERRIBLE JEALOUSY.....EVIL MEN WILL COME.....BEWARE...." Immediately I told her, "I know, I've already met a few..Gotcha though...."

I bring this little incident up, because I think that it is important to note, THAT IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING, ISN'T IT? I'm certain that someone else would've come out of the bookstore, happy as a little clam, and been left the hell alone...Not me...NEVER ME! It's as though I have a sign on my head that says...."HEY...FEELING A LITTLE TOO HAPPY/SECURE...COME BUG ME..."

Never a dull moment...Story of my life...

Later...

ESCAPE TO BEACON HILL

2009-11-21T03:48:00.005-06:00

I got back this week from a wonderful week in Boston

I fell in love with Boston last year.

(remember my blog on the "Zombie parade" in Salem?)

As usual I knew no one where I was going...

I had just always known that I would love the place.

It was MY kind of place, and was certainly "love at first site" before we ever laid eyes on
each other...

Some things you just KNOW, maybe by movies you've seen, possibly by books read....

Not the least of which, those gorgeous photographs you've always seen...

The beautiful Golden Dome on top of the State House...(my hotel this time was right next to

it...what a gorgeous sight!)

The Cobblestone Streets of Beacon Hill...Gas lamps lining the streets...( lingering in the
precious antique, wine, specialty food, gift, clothing, jewelry shops...both up and down Charles Street...This is where I stayed this time...Nirvana...)

Architecture that has except for upkeep, simply has NOT been changed since the 1700s!!!

Beautiful Back Bay with the bells ringing from the Trinity church, the oldest Episcopalian church in America...Both inside and out, it is almost overwhelming...There are no words to describe this kind of beauty...

Let us not forget those that are more the "Rodeo Drive" type of shoppers......
Newbury Street in Back Bay is your paradise...

Statues of Paul Revere, Henry Adams, Benjamin Franklin, George Washington, President Kennedy, and many others surround you....

The Boston Common (oldest park in America)...The public garden...Swans gracefully set upon the water in the summer, and in the winter covered in ice for an outdoor skating rink...This is wonderful to watch, because in Boston, as in New York, people actually know how to skate and skate well....

SO MUCH HISTORY SURROUNDS YOU...

The kind of history that one doesn't probably appreciate as a kid...One of the joys of getting older...that love of history...and to see it right in front of you...To hell with history classes, this
is the way to learn and love history (I know, unrealistic, but too bad)

Sipping tea where Louisa May Alcott used to sip her tea, as she wrote "Little Women"...

I could go on and on...(and probably will...)

Beautiful and exciting Cambridge...(where the very best restaurants are..more later)

Cambridge is literally one of the best places in which to observe people...Very interesting

types of people...Intellectual, attractive people...Love it...

Speaking of people, I have now spent two week of my life in Boston and never met a rude

person...I have ONLY encountered either polite or downright friendly people...Sorry to

bust yet another "myth" about people up north...east....

The Boston Symphony Orchestra...(my second time, where once again, I landed a seat on the 6th row, close enough to actually view the genius virtuoso that inevitably performs during the concert. This time it was a 21 year old "child"....She was obviously gifted beyond reasonable comprehension...Mozart as a child came to mind, as I watched her fingers produce literal "magic" on the piano keys....I had to try to keep my mouth from falling open...As previously stated, drooling in public is simply not an option for me....)

The Isabella Gardner Museum...

I am so passionate about this "museum" (it was actually her huge mansion), that I will try to
hold myself back from 3 paragraphs of explanation...

Let's just get to the major points...

Point number one...If at all possible, you must do what you need to do to see this stunning
museum before you die....

That said....

Point number two...There is a massive "Garden Courtyard" in the house that literally has to be seen to be believed...She loved her courtyard and poured herself and her love of art (not to mention a lot of money) into this garden and every space of this mansion....It is 3 or 4 stories, and probably contains about 30 or more rooms that contain precious art from all over the world....This is place where the horrific art burglars around 1990 got away with some Picasso, Matisse, and many other priceless paintings...They have NEVER found the paintings or the criminals...Their frames lay vacated on the walls...Mrs. Gardner left a will specifying that NOTHING ever be changed in the museum and it has not...Even when a painting is stolen, the frame remains just as it was...Wow...

Point number three... There is a precious little tea room/lunch room inside the museum if one gets "the vapors" or any other malady while trying to take it all in...

Point number four...For those that adore Museum Gift Shops, THIS is your place...I would say that next to the gift shop at the MOMO in NY, this is my favorite museum gift shop...Last year I bought the CD that was playing while I was in the shop, a collection of charming French tunes sung by well known contemporary French artist...(not well known by us, of course)
It is still one of my favorites...
I put it on when I am particularly irritated, and it seems to help.....

I digress...

Point number five...On first Thursday evening of the month, and on Sundays at 1:30, they have small and interesting "concerts" by musicians from all over the world...I attended one this time while in Boston, and while it wasn't exactly my kind of musical preference, I really enjoyed the whole "private" affair held in one of Mrs. Gardner's "concert rooms"....(It was an "experiment" in Classical and Synthesizer music, that had its exciting moments, I must admit)

So that you don't think that I am just waxing on about nothing...do check out their website if you are more interested...I feel that it is my duty to share this incredible place with the world...

www.gardnermuseum.org/

There are many wonderful things in and about Boston...Much more than this, and I might as well write a guide book (hmm...think this has been done already...but not by me! Note to self...think
about this later...)

I know that most of my followers are foodies...so I would be remiss if I didn't tell you that this
is one of the best places for foodies in the country...Seriously, it's right up there with San Francisco, you just have to know where to go....

I do think that there are some wonderful places in Boston itself, "Hamersley's Bistro" being one of them, but most of the really special and deliciously different ones, I have found, reside in Cambridge....

I was there for a week, and I must say that it was difficult for me not to revisit my favorites, which I did, but I managed to try two new ones....(I did go to my very favorite twice though...)

I will provide you with a list of not to be missed places for foodies...(but I must say that I do it out of love for my fellow foodies, because it is VERY difficult at times to share one's researched and favorite "gems"....)

Okay...here goes....(oh, and of course, nothing is cheap, because organic, quality, fresh and farm grown sent immediately to restaurant, type of food, never is...Foodies simply cannot be bothered with that silly detail anyway...)

In Boston...

South End:
Hamersley's Bistro http://www.hamersleysbistro.com/

B & G oysters http://www.bandgoysters.com/

North End:
This is their "Little Italy"...many good Italian ones here...I am not particularly as huge a fan as others of Italian, though I understand that "Mama Maria" set in a century old farmhouse and right across from Paul Revere's home is suppose to be quite special

The North End is where one could find some authentic and cheaper food...I understand that
"Mike's Pastry" is also wonderful for the best pastries....(note Mama Maria NOT cheap)

I did do a foodie tour here last year, but never made it back to dine here...One of those, need to
do my next visit deals....

Many of these restaurants that line Hanover Street are Mom and Pop and may only take cash, so be prepared...

Special mention for "Neptune's Oyster" in North End...People rave about their "Lobster Rolls"

Cambridge:

"Oleana" (my favorite restaurant ANYWHERE)

(Vegetarians take note...I have been there three times now, and have never tasted meat, because the Vegetarian dining option is so incredible, it is what I always get...It is different every
night...)

"Craigie on the Square"

This chef won the James Beard Award...

I did the after 9Pm on Sunday night "Chef's Whim"

You have to be adventurous, because you do either meat or veg, and then it's up to his

"whim" at the moment as to what your 4 or 6 course dinner is plus dessert....

This is the first time I have ever eaten "sweetbreads", a Hannibal Lector favorite, and I must
say, I probably will not seek them out again, but I got through it and it was quite delicious...I don't know...think I have seen "Hannibal" too many times to appreciate this....

The rest of the course were too complex to even describe, but all very special and delicious...

I sat next to a woman who was also by herself, doing the "whim" and even she got different
things than I did...(interesting woman, on business in Cambridge...A physician recruter for an infamous hospital in Memphis, who meets with soon to be graduate Medical students from Harvard and Scientist from MIT....Great job...."I get excited talking about Science"...She was also a serious foodie...)

It was fun, a great experience, and I will do it again...

They also had a "cocktail whim"...4 Mini cocktails of their choosing, from light to dark, in the cutest little miniature cocktail glasses that you have ever seen. If Ken and Barbie had "cocktail hour", this is what they would drink out of....
Okay, Okay...maybe not that small....

"Hungry Mother"...

Excellent Chef living in Cambridge, who saw a need for "gourmet" Southern fare...I have eaten it in Charleston, some of the best ever, and his take, although quite different, was no less delicious and I highly recommend it....
He had me at the "pimento cheese" starter and it just got better and better...
Anyone who can make "greens" taste that delicious, has my vote....(and no bacon it seemed)

All three of these are "foodie heaven"....

All of these places must be reserved, and Craigie probably a bit ahead of time...
I'd do it at least a week in advance, maybe longer..

All are very, very popular....

Those folks in Cambridge love the good stuff....and I'm right there with them...

Oh and don't let me forget to mention the really cool bookstores and poetry slams that they
have in Cambridge...

Great jazz as well....

I could do at least 3 or 4 days in Cambridge alone...

My hotel is different every time, but never anything less than remarkable...This time it even came with a chauffeur...I used him about 3/4 of the time, and he had to be booked, as it was a small hotel and everyone wanted service....(Boston is a great walking city though....)

XV Beacon was my hotel....

Other great hotels...The new "Liberty hotel" in Beacon Hill, The Fairmont Copely in Back Bay,

the Charlesmark ( very reasonable), Beacon Hill Hotel and Bistro ( somewhat reasonable), the

Charles Street Inn (bed and breakfast with incredible rooms named after famous Bostonians, expensive but seasonal like most of them)....The Elliot Hotel in Back Bay...These would be my particular picks....

So, I had another adventure in Boston, and plan on many more...

Some choose to "Escape to Witch Mountain"...that's so ordinary....

I'd much rather "Escape to Beacon Hill"

okay, alright, I'll stop now....

DREAMING HER LIFE AWAY

2009-10-06T01:39:00.003-05:00

I'm so out of touch

With the Poet in me...

With the Daughter,

the Mother,

and the

"Comic Wanna Be"...

You see

I've been

around here

More than

half a Century long..

(Though the Piano Music's gone

with the Girl

that sang the Songs...)

Such a Shame that I'm

Dreaming My Whole Life Away...

While the World is still Spinning,

I'm Asleep Night and Day...

Won't SOMEONE

Awaken Me!

(Time is so Dear...)

Before ALL of my

Todays

and

Tomorrows

DISAPPEAR....

Nicole (10/6/09)

YES, I'M STILL KICKIN...WELL SORT OF...

2009-10-02T00:40:00.005-05:00

Though one would have to wonder at this point...

Remember when I used to write 3 entries/week? Well, obviously those days are on hold right now...Believe me, it's not from a lack of interest...As they say, I am "running as fast as I can", these days/nights....

Therein lies the problem and/or change...

Working nights is not that hard...It's the days/nights off that are difficult...

The adjustment is quite difficult and fatiguing...

I find myself just working and sleeping all of the time...In between those two activities I try my best to meet friends for dinner, go out of town, and generally just try to barely meet the minimum when it comes to keeping up with life's necessities...

I've actually been late with bills sometimes, NOT because I don't have the money, but because I am lost in this tunnel- like existence, and paying the bills is a more difficult endeavour than it used to be!

Now...enough of that...Blah..Blah...Blah

Your took the job...you deal with it...

Problem is...the job which should not be THAT difficult at this point, is harder than it should be, due to the recently promoted individual that is over me...

For one thing....he never sees me, so his judgements are unfounded at best...

For another....he doesn't like me....

Oh well...sort of been there and done that at this point...

Surely it will get better...

My relationship with fellow employees is definitely improved...

But this guy that's over me...Bad news to say the least

Too bad he's an egotistical, young , inexperienced Sap....(they make the worst managers...)

If you are a person that can kiss___ on a regular basis and still come home and look at yourself with respect in the mirror, then you probably do well with these types...

My problem is, like so many others, that this is a difficult endeavour for me, and always has been...

I don't even mind kissing ___if I respect the person, but when I don't...it's tough...

Oh well...just like you can't pick you Mother-In-Law, you can't pick you boss....

Ah...some things in life just NEVER change...They are like the wind, clouds, sun, moon...they are and always will be THERE...

Let's face it...This particular problem/situation has been around as long as JELLO and possibly even longer!

Just got back from visiting Austin last week. I have not been there is so many years that I do not recall having been there at all!

I DID see "THE VELVEETA CLUB"...This is a club where I had actually gotten a job with the comedy troupe that I was a part of...We were supposed to play there on Friday and Saturday nights...Considering that it was a good 4 hour drive away, I'm not sure that it would have ever worked out...I quit about that time, but I'm pretty sure that the troupe never performed there...It was kinda cool to see it anyway...Of course it was a dump, which all comedy clubs should be....

My purpose of going to Austin was to see my older son...I have not seen him for a year....I also met his "partner".....

His partner, I was warned before meeting him, was an "artist" and tattooed from head to foot as well as having these outrageously large holes in his ears...(believe they are called "gauged"'')

I cannot begin to tell you how many frightening images and exposed nerve cells that I experienced before meeting him...

I was so freaked out that I practiced "aversion therapy" before I met him, by pulling up the most bizarre and frightening images on the Internet that I could find of tattooed and "gauged" individuals...

I do believe that this helped me, as upon meeting him, he was not even CLOSE to being as scary as anything that I had viewed....What immediately calmed me was that he had these very kind and gentle eyes...I was smitten at once....Turns out that he was a very nice young man, very intelligent, and he is crazy about my son....I know that most of you might "wince" when one says that, but it is interesting how when things in your life are not anything like the "Cleavers" or the "Waltons", you eventually DO adjust your way of viewing things...

In the end, you, like all parents, want your child to be with someone that appreciates and loves them....My son is not an "easy" person to love...He is extraordinary in so many ways, but is not "easy"....I understand that it must take a lot of patience and understanding at times, and this young man appears to have that...First impressions, of course, are just that...Time is a much bigger talker...

I took one of my best friend with me, and we stayed at the "Driskill hotel"...

Fabulous and HAUNTED...Full of amazing history from WAY BACK...Unbelievably gorgeous.....Check it out...www.driskillhotel.com

We looked for ghosts, but did not meet any...On the other hand, my son went up to my room

to obtain an antacid, and he took the wrong elevators, got lost, ended up in an empty eerie ballroom, the elevator doors shut, and he claims that he saw and heard from a ghost, but was so upset when he returned to us from my room, that he was unable to elaborate...Of course, when he left, my friend and I retraced his steps and saw nothing...Uh...except another small group of ghost seekers, that is...Three guys that were not staying at the hotel..

They freaked me out more than any ghost could have...

I also got a chance to see a wonderful friend while there, and she met us for dinner one night...and just a bit of dancing afterwards...just my two friends and I....It was fun and a bit crazy...We all overdid it a bit, but it was a good time for all...

My son and I had a wonderful visit...Austin is truly an "artsy" kind of place, which I love...Of course everyone wants to live there...I can see why...

We went to a lot of interesting art and antique shops, but there was not a lot of time...With less than three full days there, some of those places will have to be seen on my return there...I plan on going 4 or 5 times/year, as I don't want there to be another long absence...

Life is far too short for such a thing...

I had truly missed my son...Even though things have been tough, and still can be, I was so glad for the opportunity to see him and spend a bit of time together...He was at his "best"...When he is at his "best" there is no one better...

He seems to be feeling well right now....He has been to his first clinic visit, and things look good at this point...I am thankful for that...He has to work too much, of course, but in some ways I think

that it is good for him to do so...He thrives in the public....(An entertainer just like his Mom)

So what travels are next? Well just about my favorite...My return to Boston in November...It has been a year since I first visited and fell deeply in love with the place...

It is the ultimate escape place for me..I love everything about it...(yes...even the people...)

There is a very special Art Extravaganza that occurs during my visit, and I simply cannot wait...Of course then there is the Boston Symphony and The Isabella Gardner Museum, two of my favorite things EVER....If Heaven is anything like the Boston Symphony or the Garden Courtyard at the Isabella, then it certainly will be everything that I have ever imagined it to be...

My hotel there is so cool that I will save my assessment of it upon my return...I just know that any hotel room with a fireplace that automatically lights up with a control button is "my kinda place!"

(I experienced that in a Seattle hotel room, and I felt like I was in one of those early James

Bond films...If you've never seen "To Russia with Love", you gotta check out the gadgets..)

I am hoping for cool weather and good health (don't even get me started about the "plague"... Far too much of it around...)

Begins to make one feel uncomfortable...Sitting in a car dealership today, waiting for my car to be serviced, a girl start sneezing, and I find myself jumping up to leave the room...In my fantasies, I am going up to the girl and inquiring, "Are you sick? How dare you come out in public, sick!"...

Needless to say, one can get a bit paranoid...It just appears to be SO catching...Everyone that I know who has been exposed, comes down with it within just a few hours of exposure...Bit scary....

I will spend a few days, (my 4 days off), in December, back in San Francisco...I have never seen

the Wharf and Union Square all "lit up" for Christmas, and I hear that it is absolutely

gorgeous...I will stay in the same place that I stayed last visit...I cannot believe the "deals" that I have been able to get the last few trips...Taking Boston out of the picture (yeah, like New York

they want the big bucks), the beautiful hotels in San Francisco and Austin have been super-deals that even I cannot believe...Think it has something to do with the amount of time that one

researches, and then just knowing the many ways that "deals" can be gotten...I also really

love to research a vacation destination....A hobby of sorts really....(Hmm...maybe I should

consider a less expensive hobby?)

Naw...it's all good...Overtime may not be good for the body, but it pays for the trips...barely....

More later....

AN ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL LAST DAY AND EVENING TO REMEMBER!

2009-08-27T01:50:00.007-05:00

My last day in San Francisco (for this month anyway...)
Seriously it will be awhile until I return this time, because I have places to go for the next three months, (which of course I will write about), so San Francisco, more than likely will not be visited again until the new year....
This makes today, my last day here, somewhat bittersweet....
What a day and evening it has been though!!!!!!!!

I stayed up a bit late last night writing this blog, so when my wake up call came at 9:30am, I simply COULD NOT drag myself out of bed (could have something to do with my being up around 34 hours straight on Monday, don't know....)
I woke up finally at around 1100am, and had just enough time to get ready for the play that I was seeing this afternoon....
I called the concierge, and she honored my request to pick up my new necklace that was being re- sized for me a couple of blocks over...She insisted on going herself, as she had never actually seen this wonderful jewelry shop, even though she had suggested it, but only heard of it...She was excited to go...(Maybe she just wanted to be able to leave the hotel...not sure...All I know is that she was going to pick up my necklace for me, and I was happy....)
She showed up at my door with the necklace, and I tipped her, and asked if she had taken a look, and she said that she "hadn't dared to" so I invited her in to see it...She gasped...I gasped...
We both decided that it was the perfect necklace that could be worn anywhere....Jeans or velvet, it was a go....That was the selling point to me as well, as I have no patience for having to wait for an "occasion" to be able to wear a wonderful piece of jewelry, and simply refuse to....I like to wear whatever piece I want when I am in the mood to do so...One of life's many pleasures....

The play, "August, The Osgage", was outstanding...The theater was PACKED....The set was simple and appropriate...The place itself is being touted as the best "modern day Tennessee Williams type of piece" known in these times...The reviews don't lie....Along with the writing, the cast is dynamic...It is a HIT! I feel so lucky to be amongst the first to see it straight off Broadway and it's Tony Winning Award Status....The dialogue is "raw" sometimes...There are two 10 minute breaks...The play is 3 1/2 hours long...On both breaks, I hear some of the people around my parents age stating, "I didn't hear that kind of language in the Service!", or "I don't even KNOW people that speak that way!"....Well, I certainly didn't hear anything new, or even anything that I've never said before, (sorry Mom and Daddy), so it was not at all shocking to me...This is a play that I must make absolute sure that my sister sees when it comes to Dallas this January...My friend David as well...They will both LOVE it....

I took a MUCH needed nap when I got back from the Theater and had one of the worst dreams that I have ever had...The characters in the dream were all members of my family, and it was one of those dreams that you don't realize is a dream, and it was horrifying....I'm sure that it had something to do with the play, as it was a seriously DARK DARK comedy....

Thank heavens I had called and amended my dinner reservation for 9 PM, because the concierge forgot and did the wake up call a bit late, still I made it to dinner a bit ahead of time...
Tonight, my pick for dinner was a place that was called "GLOBE".... (Of course, I had never been there, as I think that I shared with you earlier, that it is always my plan to visit new places....The exception to this will be in Boston this Fall, where I WILL visit new places, but two of my very favorite places are there, so of course I must revisit them....)

As usual, I do a lot of research before spending the time, money, and calories at an establishment....I was happy that I had not eaten all day...When you have dinner and drinks at 9 PM, it's just a happier situation from the start!
The cabbie let me out on the corner from this establishment, and honestly, it looked a bit "divey" from the onset, but as that never stops me, I soared into the place...
Inside it was more what I would term, "comfortable" and "cool vibed" (if that is even still understood in this day and age...)
For the most part, the walls were rather stark, the restaurant was small and dark (LOVE DARK), and the tables and booths very comfy....The very, very small kitchen was half visible in the back, and that is where I was seated. I had specifically asked NOT to be put in what I like to term a "Manhattan" table, which is backed up to the wall, right NEXT (as though you are having dinner with them), another table...Surprisingly, my message was read, and reiterated, and I had my very own table right near the kitchen, where I could spy the chefs expressions while they worked...(I liked that...of course it did not hurt that the "main" chef looked like Kurt Cobain...not sure about that spelling, btw....)....
I ordered a house specialty cocktail (something with vodka, lemon, mint, etc)...good, but next visit I will order a glass of wine, as it would go much better with the cuisine....
The menu was small...Only a few dishes in each category, but it looked extremely promising...

For Appetizers:

Mariquita Farms wild arugula with baby beets and ricotta salata
Gazpacho with dungeness crab, avocado, cucumber and sweet tomatoes
Salad lardon: frisee with warm bacon vinaigrette and poached chick eggs
Tuna tartare with genovese basil and black olive tapenade
Blistered padron peppers and cherry tomatoes with fresh mozzarella
Rabbit rillettes with pickles, grain mustard and brioches roll
Mixed heirloom tomatoes with dry cured olives, cucumbers, Genovese basil and feta
PT. Reyes oysters (Tomales Bay)
Soup of the day

Average price appetizers was around $12 (except for the oysters)

Here were the sides....($7.00 each)

Creamy corn with marjoram
Macaroni and Tillamook cheese
Romano beans with bacon
Beets with lemon and basil

Entrees....

Braised lamb shank with potato risotto and sweet 100 tomatoes
Homemade spaghetti with roasted tomatoes, basil and garlic
King salmon on boccacino pasta with rapini, aglio e olio and salsa verde
Local halibut with Capay Organic zucchini and heirloom tomato fondue
Grilled Meyer Ranch bone-in ribeye with grilled onions and potato gratin for two
Potato gnocchi with chanterelles, bacon and chives
Quail over baby leeks, pancetta and black mission figs
Spicy monkfish stew with clams, mussels, habeneros and chili fish broth

The most expensive entree was the steak for two which was $26!

Pizza

Green tomatoes and fontina cheese
Wild mushroom and black truffle oil
Sopressata with egg sunnyside up
Fennel sausage and onions greens

Pizzas were $16

What a great priced restaurant, eh?

I have a decided weakness for Salad Lardon, having the best I have ever had at a restaurant by the name of "Hammersley's Bistro" in Boston (had dinner twice while I was there!), and so I decided to see what "Globe" could do with it....

Expertise and Quality Ingredients, plus possibly a trip or two to France is all I've gotta say....
The Frisee was mounded in the center of the shallow bowl, dressed with an almost "too tart" vinagrette, (though I loved it, some would wince a bit), and scattered nice cubed and fried pieces of lardon were on top, and on EACH side (there's usually only ONE), were TWO FRESH CHICK EGGS (you can SO tell the difference), that were lightly and PERFECTLY poached....
A real contender for BEST SALAD LARDON ( right up there with the infamous Hammersley's)
I made sure that the message got to the chef....

For an entree, I chose the homemade light and fluffy potato gnocchi....
Swimming in a light but extremely flavorful sauce with a generous amount of delicious chanterelles, with just the right touch of bacon and chives....
Someone in the kitchen knows EXACTLY what they're doing...GNOCCHI this light is a masterpiece to be able to pull off....Couple that with one of the most flavorful and light sauces on pasta that I have ever encountered, and you've got yourself something to talk about...
So here I am doing just that....

It would simply not be right of me to leave out dessert, as it was another big-time WINNER....
First I will share the dessert menu with you, though....

Warm pluot crostata, plum jam creme chantilly
Flourless chocolate mousse bar pistachio crunch
Elderberry brulee, chocolate fudge cake and almond phyllo
Peach gateau, maple-almond ice cream

All desserts were $8

Needless to say, EVERYTHING, including the ice cream, is made in-house....

I chose the elderberry brulee, chocolate fudge cake and almond phyllo.....

The dessert consisted of a square dense base of chocolate fudge cake, topped with the most delightful square, thicker than the cake, of FROZEN Creme Brulee, mixed with Almond Phyllo...Around the cake was a drizzle of elderberry sauce.....
The dessert could certainly be shared, but not too much for one...(or not for THIS one...), and was amazing...I have never had anything like it...It was light but OH SO DELICIOUS! Every bite was an epiphany!
I told the restaurant that I would not only be back, and tell everyone that I knew about it, but would also feature it in my blog....The hostess wanted the address of my blog...So....Here is my review...Hope that I did the restaurant justice....Also, lest I forget, I must make mention of the graciousness of the restaurant personnel....This makes for an even nicer experience...

I will say, that this particular trip has been a most foodie inspiring one...My last trip here a month ago was interesting as well, but this visit was certainly one that was worth writing about...I have decided to start featuring restaurant reviews in my blog when I visit places that are worth mentioning...You can be sure that it will mean most anytime that I am out of town, but it might also include some dining experiences that I have in my own city as well.....

This, as most of my solo trips, has been very interesting and rewarding in so many ways....I ended the night, before I REALLY ended it (which is when I write this blog), by having a "nightcap" at my hotel bar...Lovely space....The bar, of course, is all part of the hotel...If it's not wonderful, I probably won't stay there....
I sat at the bar, and two seats down from me, sat a man dining on what I had the night that I arrived, their wonderful burger and pomme frites....
After a few minutes, I asked the man if he enjoyed the pomme frites, as much as I had...There began a very, very long and interesting conversation with one of the more intriguing individuals that I have met for a very long time (and I meet A LOT of interesting people on my Solo Trips)...I will not go into detail, but let us just conclude that we talked of many interesting things and laughed and mutually enjoyed our conversation ...This man is very successful...A producer, director, and writer, as it turns out, of "America's Most Wanted", and previously a Stand-Up Comic, and still writes for some of the most successful comedy shows on television...He is here shooting a piece, (actually sounds interesting, though I confessed that I don't like "America's Most Wanted", because it freaks me out...Same reason that I don't watch the local news)...
They are shooting in Berkley....We have a lot in common....We talked a lot about hospitals...His young son died in one a few years ago....We talked about writing and performing comedy...We compared notes on hotels and restaurants in San Francisco, Manhattan, Santa Fe, Washington DC, (where he lives), Boston, and other places....He had MANY questions for me....(Who knew I was interesting enough for one to ask so many questions about?...Hmmm....Did I convince you for just a second that I don't think that I am?....Sucker!....Just kidding...Couldn't help myself, as usual...)

If you are wondering, he was age appropriate, highly intelligent, nice looking, very successful, kind, extremely interesting, and MARRIED to a wonderful woman who works as a producer for Lifetime television....YES....As I have said before......All the good ones....(and I'll let you finish that sentence....)
Still, I LOVE meeting these intruiguing people from all walks of life...It has simply become my absolute JOY to travel and experience these things....
I feel SO lucky to be able to do so....
This part of my life is turning out better than I could have ever hoped!
Hope you enjoy this post.....
Later.........

San Francisco Again and Again and Again......

2009-08-26T00:02:00.008-05:00

I know that I was here a month ago...

So what...

I'm here again...

There's a reason, there is...Promise

I WANTED TO....

Hmmm....

Reason enough for me....

No one in their right mind NEEDS a reason to visit San Francisco on a regular basis...

(especially someone who lives in blaring, unreasonable, unforgiving, cruel heat, like that of

Dallas....)

Miserable is not a state in which I find happiness or contentment, so I escape it at all costs....

(if I can...and I can....)

Work yourself to death? Sure...You gotta keel over from something...Might

as well be in luxurious surroundings....

My Father told me last week, (my Mother had just said that she was going "to die in two years", and I think that I commented on that extraordinary premonition), "Well, you might as well start
preparing for DEATH the minute you're born, cause it might just be a rumor, but I think a valid one, that everyone DIES"...

THE TRUTH.....EXPOSED....

I was dumbfounded....Part of my childlike demeanor vanished forever!

So, I am in one of the most wonderful places on earth, in my opinion...

San Francisco....

Love is the word that comes to mind....

Love for weather

Love for hotels

Love for people

Love for art

Love for unique and beautiful jewelry (don't ask...Okay, but I could not stop myself!)

DRUM ROLL PLEASE.....

LOVE FOR INCREDIBLE CUISINE!

Now, it is no secret to any of you that follow me, that I am a bonafide "Foodie"...

I was a "Foodie" before anyone would admit it, before anyone cared to even discuss it....

We certainly weren't the group that we are today...

Large and Looming...

Bonded and Interesting!

I do a lot of research before I leave town...I do it about everything...hotels, art, theater, weather, general happenings, but CUISINE is absolutely paramount! (hotels and food being the very most important of all...)

I do my homework, and 9 1/2 times out of 10 it pays off....

Tonight was NO exception....

Having been here a month ago, I was very interested in making reservations at a different hotel and two different great restaurants that I had not visited last month, or ever...

This time I elected to stay at "The Campton Place Hotel"....First thing is...Perfect Location...
Second...Lovely...
If you can get a decent rate as I did, (it's usually WAY overpriced), I highly recommend it...
Simple, streamlined elegance....
Service is incredible....
Royalty is the word that comes to mind...

I DID hit a "HOME RUN" with my choice to dine at "The House", an unassuming little "you'd never know unless you knew", Asian Fusion restaurant in the North Beach area of the city.

There are many restaurants in North Beach, and in my opinion, they are head to head with the delicious cuisine that one can find in the "Mission" area....

Both are known for the best dining venues in this "Foodie Heaven"....

I walked in to "The House", and almost hit someone with the door, as there were several people "crouched" around the opening of the restaurant...It was small, unadorned, LOUD, and crowded...It is Tuesday night...Even in San Francisco, this is CROWDED!

About 1/2 of the restaurant patrons are Asian...

THIS IS A VERY GOOD SIGN!

Everyone in the restaurant has a look on their face that is reminiscent of a child on Christmas morning after Santa has visited...

THIS IS A VERY GOOD SIGN!

I had read that even if one has a reservation, they still have to wait...

On the way over, I mention to the cabbie that I have heard that this restaurant is very good...

He responds, "Yeah, that's what I was told..."

This doesn't feel promising to me, and he goes on to say, "Just don't order the seafood combination plate...There was a little scoop of rice, and then only 4 shrimp! (turns out there is nothing that even begins to resemble a "seafood combination" on the menu...I feel sure that he is confusing this restaurant with "Red Lobster"....)

I felt just a twinge better...It dawned on me that he was just "cheap".

I know "cheap" when I hear or see it....For some reason, people that work in a hospital tend to be afflicted with it...

Sorry, just the truth...Not sure why...

When I arrive at the restaurant, I start to feel a bit negative that no one has come over to ask me
if I have a reservation...I ask the group of people next to me, "Is there even someone that comes to ask?"
They reply "Yes...It's usually just one of the waiters...They came about 20 minutes ago and told us that they were getting our table ready..."

Hmmmm.....

The waitresses look harried and crazy...The patrons look exhilarated...

I say, "Well, you know, it's Tuesday night, and there are many other places that I could go..." as my eyes gaze at the bevy of cabs driving up and down the street...

A young woman in the waiting party asks, "Have you ever been here before?'

"No", I reply....

"It's Asian Fusion, you know..."

"I know"

"It's amazing"...

"Not what my cabbie said..."

This, by the way, is an entire family waiting together..Her Mother smiles at me...
One of those, "I know something that you don't" smiles"..

"I can't imagine...It's quite amazing...", the young woman comments....

About this time, people are starting to line up out on the street..
Cramming to try to get into the door...One of the waiters comes over and says, "Please shut the door...You have to stay out on the street....You MUST close this door!"

A poor, waiting girl on the street pleads, "But we just want to put our name in ....Paleeeeessseee!"

The owner...it appears...goes outside, and is heard to pronounce, "It will be at least an hour, unless you have a reservation...."

No one moves...They all look like they're having a "block party"...No one attempts to leave...

People just keep coming...There is an absolute small "crowd" outside...
You would think there that was a celebrity inside..

They wait tirelessly...They MUST have dinner here....
It's an obvious obsession...

Finally a waitress comes over...She asks me if I have a reservation...I tell her that I do and in my Bitchy "KNOW IT FRIGGIN ALL VOICE" ask her...

"How long is the wait expected to be?"

( I have one foot in the door and another headed for the Mission area....)
She says 10 minutes...I wait...

I get a table...Near the kitchen, which I usually turn my nose up at, but somehow this time it is inconsequential....

The aromas that waif from the kitchen are heady and aromatic to the point that I almost feel weak with anticipation...

Suddenly I remember what it felt like to fall in love...

I am mentally drooling....(I think that I have mentioned previously that I NEVER drool in public)

I start with the crab cake with a spicy Asian remoulade..

It comes beautifully stylized, standing up in a shallow dish dressed and fried as a "pear" and the stem is a "taro chip strip"....(now I only know this because I have seen and tasted taro chips at Whole Foods....)

I have had MANY crab cakes in my time, some of which have been utterly delicious...

This one is unspeakable...There are no words to describe the sensation my tastebuds are
experiencing...It's obscene....

When I take the first bite of this crispy amazing concoction and dip it in the spicy Asian Remoulade, I have to take a deep breath, for fear that I will cry in public!

From that point on, I take small delectable bites, chewing slowly to savor each flavorful moment...

Next is a dish of spicy Sechuwan Noodles with a Grilled Flatiron Steak....

The noodles are homemade and thicker than spaghetti or the usual oriental noodles......They are mixed with a sauce, 2 or 3 different julienned peppers, sesame seeds, and other ingredients, then layered with sauteed and delicious shredded Napa cabbage, then the flavorful grilled steak, and finally topped with more sauce, flash fired onions, peppers, and sesame seeds...
Across the bowl are a couple of thinly sliced radishes topped with a very small amount of a florescent orange substance, which I believe is salmon roe, though that is just an educated guess...
(the only kind that I care to make...Okay..just hit me...)

This dish is so creative and beautiful that it takes me a moment to delve into it....but ONLY A MOMENT.....

The homemade noodles, of course, do not even resemble those in a box, and the sauce is so complex that even I (a pretty good dissector, as cooks or foodies go...), cannot quite place all of
the ingredients together in my mind....
The steak is sliced and cooked to a PERFECT Medium...pink and juicy, and the entire dish is a dream....

Dessert is not NEEDED (when is it ever?), but is ordered out of sheer curiosity...
What will an Asian Fusion restaurant, which is quite clearly, "the real thing", do with a homemade apple pie?
Curious foodies everywhere need to know...
It is my duty to find out!

What can they do?
A LOT... is the answer to that...
Now, some would say that it was not sweet enough, but then I am not one who likes an overly sweet melange of apples...
The topping IS sweet with cinnamon and the crust is something that my Daddy would be exhilarated over, plus the accompanied scoop of vanilla ice cream was the perfect foil as usual...

The dessert looks so appealing, that a diner next to me exclaims,

"WHAT IS THAT? THAT LOOKS DELICIOUS...OH, MY..."

She is eating her entree, but I ask her if she wants a bite anyway...She doesn't, but a very pleasant conversation follows between the couple and myself...
He wanted to know how I found out about the restaurant, as it is somewhat obscure to those who don't already know about it...
They ended up wanting to know what the website address of my blog was, and I hope that they enjoy it...
(I can be such a braggart...almost as bad as that aforementioned type of parent that sticks window stickers on the back of their cars about their incredibly talented child...)

Most of the time, I think that I am almost just as bad....even worse because it's about MYSELF!!!!

SHAMELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tomorrow I go to the Tony Award Highly Touted Play, "August, The Osage"....
It stars Estelle Parsons, and from the Tony Awards presentation, it seriously looks like a winner...It is said to be one of the best pieces written in many years...
I am stoked..

It will be amazing...I can already feel it...(It better be...it's 3 1/2 hours long!!!!!)

Well, I have finished the "Lemon Drop Martini" that the Bartender brought while I wrote this...

I have had a nice impromptu conversation with a Drop Dead Gorgeous YOUNG man from Switzerland next to me on the other computer, so now it's time for sweet dreams....(which should be NO TROUBLE after this lovely evening's end...Oh to be young again...In a city by myself...Beautiful and appealing...To meet, by chance, a member of Switzerland's Royal Family...the Prince himself...)

Aw....c'mon...who am I talking about?
IT'S SO TIME FOR BED!

Later....

Time for a sweet dreams........Later......

Truth... Life...Timelessness

2009-08-11T01:23:00.017-05:00

"To live is so startling, it leaves little time for anything else"

Well said, Miss Emily Dickenson

Well said..

The Truth is often Timeless...Endless....

Life is sometimes best lived without a lot of "occurrences"

People tend to get bored with this type of existence, though...

Upon reflection, this would not really be "Life"

It would be more of a dream, or only possible when one is asleep, or in a coma...

There has to be "occurrences," at times both tragic and joyful in nature...

Lately, news in my life has been shocking, tragic, and yet joyful

if one can find the light inside.

My oldest son is HIV positive now

My sister had cancer

This was all found out within a few days of each other...

My son and I will see each other and spend time together for the first time in over a year next month...

It is something that we both look forward to...

With all of the turbulence in our relationship..... the anger, the sorrow.... in the end, we love each

other more than we can say....

We miss each other...

Time is felt to be more limited now...

It is a "wake-up" call of the worst kind, but we will hopefully utilize it to come together again, to mend our relationship,

to not allow the past to ruin our "present" anymore...

My sister was successfully operated on and is CANCER FREE.

She still feels horrible...

Hormones rage and rule...

Pain is slowly leaving...

She is angry and hurt with me....

She often is...

I am so sad about this that I cry while I write about it....

I had a trip planned the day she had to have emergent surgery....

She said that it was okay, as I would call when I was there, making sure all was okay...

there were plenty of people there for her...

I would have come back if it had not been okay...

She does not believe this...

I went to San Francisco....

I called, several times, and she said that she was surrounded by people, and that I should enjoy myself....

This was true...

My Mother told me that I should go....

I did....

When I got back I was punished for going....

I am so grateful, and we all are, that my sister is joyfully clear of cancer.....

She, as usual, has found a way to be angry with me...

I am back to being the "black sheep" of my family....

I have played this role for many years...

I am unfortunately getting used to it....

I feel like my Father is the only one who does not dislike me....

I hate that, and that "might" not be true, but it feels like it most of the time....

What will I ever do without him?

I break down at the thought....

What will I ever do without my Mother?

I adore my Mother, but she and I are like oil and water lately...

I pretty much upset her most of the time, though we love each other very much...

I think that forever, including now, I am a bit "too much" for her...

She is older now and does not tolerate as much...

I am older now and stubbornly "myself", and find it difficult not to be,

even during a short visit or phone call...I often punish myself for not being able

to pull that off...afterall...I am an actress by nature...

If she were given the "truth serum" injection, she would say that I am her child and she loves me, but she would concur with my impression....

I cannot change who I am, and she cannot change who she is....

It is just the way that it flows....

My older son once told me in a rage, that I only loved the little boy that he once was...

As much as that hurt, I had to reflect on it and admit, that he WAS so much easier to

love then...and, in truth, his most precious and precocious times were in those early years...

Long before things got SO MUCH harder...hurtful....

I'm sure that my own Mother feels much the same...

My sister...well...

I would love for that to be like other "sisterly" relationships that I have heard about, you

know the kind, "My sister and I are BEST FRIENDS!!!"..barf....

Kinda like those people that put "My daughter is on the Student Council!!!!" or

"My son is an HONOR ROLL student!!!!"stickers on their cars....

Give me a friggin break....

How bout putting a sticker next to it that says

"I'm their Parent and a Braggart as well!"

Don't you people realize that you make the rest of us feel inadequate?

Do you think that we NEED more help with that?

"Imbeciles!"....

(God, how I love that word...not "in vogue" anymore, but so descriptive and satisfying!)

I don't give up entirely on my sister's and my relationship turning out like the kind in the

movies, but I try to be realistic about the chances of that happening...

Sometimes the best one can do is to accept what is, and try like hell to forget about

"fairytale expectations"...

I am constantly trying to "grow up" and adhere to that truth...

So there you have it...

The tragic and the joyful...

The past and the present...

The reality and the hope....

They say that Life passes by so swiftly...

So much happens in such a relatively short amount of time...

So often I feel like there is so little time for what really matters...

With the kind of work that I am involved in, that truth is reinforced every day..

"To live is so startling, it leaves little time for anything else"

The Truth...

Timeless....Endless....

Happy girl in San Francisco

2009-07-30T03:07:00.016-05:00

Yes, I think that I loved it more this time than I ever have..

Somehow that sounds weird because for the first time, I went alone....Go figure...

I had a wonderful and VERY SHORT visit...

I met friendly and interesting people everywhere I went...

There was the financial whiz from New York, the opera singer from San Francisco, the electrician that told me that he was a rarity, since he was born and raised in San Francisco...He proceeded to tell me just how it had all changed...There was the couple vacationing from Texas, and a woman who does the registration at the hotel, an artist, who called me her "sister", who wanted to know my website address to read some of my poems...There was the guy at the corner that was waiting for a bus while I was waiting for a taxi, and we struck up a conversation after witnessing a horrendous scene involving two probable schizophrenics on the other side of the street..After viewing this outburst he commented " I HATE this city...This is the SECOND worst city in the world!!!"...I asked "What's the first", and he said "Tucson, Arizona!" Suppose that I will never visit there, as this guy seemed pretty passionate about his opinion...I won't test it...Just won't visit there...

Saw a wonderful attraction at the Modern Art Museum...The very best of Richard Avedon's collection...If you are not familiar with the photographer Richard Avedon, you would be familiar with some of his work, as it has been seen here and there for many, many years...Although he was known for photographing famous people and cult classics, I especially liked his photos of the "common" people...the everyday set...His artistry captured amazing thoughts, feelings, lifestyles, etc, without a word...just a photo....I adored this show...

I bought a new bracelet there...The new lucite that has the silver behind it so that it "shines".. Beautiful...Art museums always have the most wonderful jewelry...My favorite pieces over the years have all come from different art museums and galleries...

I also bought a coin or makeup purse made out of silver beer or coke can tabs strewn together with thick blue thread...Very cool, though sounds weird...Very futuristic looking....

Bought some other goodies as well, including my sister's birthday present for September....At first I thought that I simply could not part with it, but then my "other voice" told me that I should give it away and practice less selfishness...Hmmm...hate that "other voice"...

She will love it...A splendid reproduction...Beautiful....Don't think that she reads my blog, but just in case, will not say exactly what it is....

The hotel was beyond my expectations...I got upgraded on arrival though I am still not sure why...Asked for their biggest deluxe and a corner room, and stepped into my room only to see a place that was almost as big as my apartment...The closet itself was almost as big as my bedroom! Two chandeliers! Fantastic room...History surrounded me...Amazing photos from the turn of the century all down the hallways, which were curiously about 3 or 4 times wider than any hallways that I have ever seen....(Speaking of photos, I had not even been to my room yet, when I saw the very photo that Stanley Kubrick used in the last scene of "The Shining", the one that has Jack Nicholson's face superimposed on it...with all the gentlemen in the grand dining room...that was from the St. Francis....I had to call and tell my son that....He freaked...) I could certainly feel the many spirits that resided there from the past....It really added to the entire atmosphere...I truly loved my stay at the St. Francis...

The lobby was filled with antiques, chandeliers, huge vases, rugs, all from the grandeur of the past...

The "Clock Bar" in the lobby, new, with outrageously wonderful cocktails and warm and friendly bartenders...

Restaurants...A trip to the "Tadich Grill," a favorite of mine, was a disappointment...The fish suffered from lack of crispiness and the sourdough tasted more like rye...The infamous tartar sauce suffered from an overly added amount of dill (so easy to do when using dill)....

I cannot complain about the dining experience though...That is where I had two very interesting conversations with two very nice and intriguing people...(the wall street guy and the opera guy)

When you are by yourself, they won't give you a table...you must eat at the bar...In this restaurant it is THE PLACE to sit and eat anyway, it's just that in my travels, I have NEVER been refused a table for one...Only at the Tadich...a place KNOWN for their attitude...Kind of goes with the place...I said..."Hey isn't that discrimination...against the law?" and they said "Probably"...Can't help but love the place though...Oldest restaurant in San Francisco...Talk about atmosphere...

"The Slanted Door" was also slightly disappointing, although maybe my expectation were a bit high...This has been one of the most highly touted restaurants for the last few years in San Francisco...The restaurant itself was very cool..Beautifully modernistic Asian approach...Gorgeous lighting...Packed with beautiful people...all quite impressed to be there...Great drinks (they use a pick to break their own ice)...Great app...rice dumplings that were extremely unique in texture and taste...Ordered their "signature dish", shakin beef, think that is what it is called, and it was good, but not GREAT....Expensive, of course...Dessert was a small slice of butter pecan homemade pound cake, with a bit of homemade gelato and drunkin cherries scattered about...The pound cake was sublime and so was the gelato...I could have inhaled the cherries, but...umm...another time...another place perhaps....

The Swan Oyster Depot...an infamous, small, unpretentious and dark little raw bar near Nob Hill. Here one can sit on wobbly barstools and feast on fresh crab and shrimp cocktails ( you make your own sauce) along with sourdough and have a beer if you care to... You are joined by a lot of characters...That adds to the place....

I met and enjoyed my conversation with folks there that come in everyday, and have for years...The staff is really tight, like family...When I got home, I saw them pictured in my one of my travel magazines...Great crew...Incredible seafood....

"Boulevard"...a very impressive popular restaurant in San Francisco...Gorgeous decor...tons and tons of beautiful people (I could REALLY do without this but it comes with the territory, besides, I live in Dallas and it's par for the course here...)

The food was not only excellent, but almost too pretty to eat..

Starting with a composed and artistic salad that was sprinkled with shaved truffles, followed by
a silken tenderloin that could have almost been cut with a fork, and a dessert of a very small but delicious double chocolate pudding tart topped with a toasted homemade marshmallow, that was drizzled with chocolate sauce, and sprinkled with chocolate "curls"....Yummy meal...

Think that I was the only single diner there...Bothered by that? No....As I travel more by myself, I really do enjoy the positive aspects of travelling alone, and I have found that there are many...

I walked the entire length of the wharf, enjoying the sights of the performers, the sounds of the musicians, and the smells that surrounded me...I loved the sound of the waves...the sea animals...the site of happy people all around me....

The weather was beyond perfect...At home it raged in the 100s'...Here it was typically in the upper 60s'...wearing a light sweater was a dream come true....I have decided that it is the weather that causes those in San Francisco to be in perpetual good moods, and it is the weather in Dallas that causes many to stay in a bad one...(especially those behind the wheel of a car...don't get me started)

I got home and made plans immediately to return in August...

September everything goes up price wise...

I couldn't help myself and won't...

Getting ready for more overtime at work starting tomorrow, it makes it all worth it to be able to think about spending my days off there again in just a few weeks...

Such a glorious place...

Lose your heart there, so that you can return again and again to reclaim it!

2009-06-30T07:06:00.011-05:00

Yes, a girl like me, with a job like mine, needs a few days away on a fairly frequent basis...I have been working a lot of overtime, and continue to, so I am rewarding myself with a very few days in San Francisco soon.

I cannot take vacation until November, so I shall work three nights, get off and grab a plane, fly to San Fransisco, hopefully arrive there awake, and then return three days later....Sounds like a plan to me...Got THE best deal of Expedia! Never used anything like that before...(always makes one a bit nervous, you know...)

I will stay at the famed Hotel St. Francis, the one that was almost destroyed in the 1906 Great Earthquake that caused the Great Fire which practically destroyed the city.

"Guests in the major hotels, such as the Palace Hotel which was constructed on sand dunes, reported violent shaking of the interior of the building. In the Hotel St. Francis, the tallest fully-occupied building in San Francisco, guests reported rolling, falling down stairs, and being thrown from wall-to-wall by the 1906 shock. As these people left the hotels, some wandered into the wrecked "South-of-Market" area, where the most damage to buildings and the most deaths occurred."

It's been a long time since that event...It is now owned by the Westin hotel chain, but still retains it's opulent lobby, staircase, and other relics....There is also a brand new Tower with contemporary rooms, that in some ways actually look nicer than the original ones in the Main bldg, but I have chosen a classic room in the Main bldg, because anywhere there is a chandelier in a room and an "Oak Bar" in the lobby, has my name on it! http://westinstfrancis.com/

My memories of San Francisco are wonderful, as I have been there several times, but not in about 5 years. I have done Alcatraz (at night! woooooo), Sausalito several times, the Exploratorium, the Haight, Chinatown, the Piers, Ghiradelli Square, and on and on...The food there is legendary, and you almost can't go wrong anywhere, but since time is of the essence on this excursion, I have chosen to spend my first day at the Modern Museum, my favorite Modern Art museum, and the art galleries and cute shops around Union Square. The next day will be reserved for The Pier, where I can walk along to the sounds and sites of the otters and seagulls, while I hear the splashing of the waves, and admire those on their beautiful sailboats...One extremely interesting site, if you are up early on the Wharf, is the "club" of swimmers, young and old, that dive into those extremely cold waters for marathon swimming every single morning...Most people would collapse in water of that temperature, but these folks have had a lot of practice! I cannot forget to stop by the infamous City Lights Bookstore where one can

still feel Jack Kerouac's presence. http://citylightsbookstore.com/

Of course I had to plan at least my two dinners, because without a reservation in San Francisco, you can forget it....

I chose to go new places, which is hard, since I have my favorites, but one MUST EXPAND their culinary knowledge/taste, so I chose the infamous "Boulevard" http://www.boulevard.com/ and the Slanted Door, http://www.theslanteddoor.com/ ....

I may try to sneak a very early lunch in at my favorite place, and just grab a bowl of bouillabaisse at http://www.tadichgrill.com/ , the oldest restaurant in San Francisco with "crusty" waiters that just add to the whole experience, in my opinion.....

Speaking of "crusty" is there ANYTHING better than the Sourdough Bread in San Francisco? Not on this earth, there's not.

Of course, I will write a review of my excursion when I return...In the meantime, I must work, work, and work.....

Last poem for Kerin

2009-06-19T03:17:00.003-05:00

I was surprised a couple of week ago, when I arrived in a room at the hospital, to take care of

my "new patient" that had just arrived.

It was Kerin, the patient that I had taken care of at the previous hospital where I worked, the young woman with the very, very severe head injury, who I called "Cat woman" and wrote a previous poem about, here on my blog...It was written on 4/19 and was entitled, "Nowhere"

It affected me to see her, take care of her again, as she was so very much more unresponsive, and looked so much worse...I will not elaborate, because it is too much, believe me...

I think that this poem has somewhat helped me to put her to rest...

Some of it just takes a bit of time...Nothing that I have not had to deal with before...

Once Again, For Kerin

9/19/09

she came once
again

but didn't stay
long

she scared me
this time

her head

just so
wrong

how much
are you
going to
take from
this girl

whose left
all she's known
and is far
from this world?

why can't you
just stop and
leave her alone

allow her to
pass from this
world on her
own

I searched
too deeply
inside of
her tomb

The darkness
so frightening
the silence,
the doom

All dignity
lost
and the
whiteness
of light

the sound
of machines
from morning
to night

I gazed at the
photos

her cats....
there were three

She loved them
they've lost her

they wander
and grieve

I called her
"Cat woman"

her eyes
stuggled
so

just where
had I
come from?

but she
didn't
know

it's something
that I
simply
can't
understand

just why
are they
living?

My anger
demands!

it's horrid,
and tragic,
just how did
she rate,
this seemingly
lifeless and
nightmarish
state?

why can't she
just rest
like we all
hope to
do

when life
and its
struggles
are finally
through?

Quick but needed update to my faithful followers

2009-06-17T21:53:00.005-05:00

Like the new avitar? I do...

It's about as realistic as the last one...
Neither of them look anything like me, though I absolutely FEEL like both of them, as somewhere inside, thoses photos are lurking...

They are certainly who I represent on the INSIDE...
I do not take good photos...Some people do, I am just not one of them...
I am ALWAYS better looking in person, as most will attest...
Even in keeping with that fact, I do not have a recent photo to put there, or I probably would...
I don't as of yet, (soon to change) have a computer situation that has photos on it, so I simply must use other photos at this time...
Honestly, though I look nothing like this woman or the last, I'm told that I don't hurt the eyes terribly, I promise...
I wanted to post a quick entry, to my faithful followers, to let you know that things at work are better, and that yes, it looks as though I am going to survive...
It has been one helluva hard course, and still has its bumps in the road, but after this last weekend, it appears as though some of my "we don't like you" co-
hearts have loosened their bogus first impressions, and actually appear as though "maybe we do like you..."
Just wanted all of you to know, who have suffered along with me in this horrendous new path, that it appears as though things will work out in the end...
I am happier now and hopeful, and I just wanted all of you to know....
LATER....NICOLE...

EARLY IN THE WEE HOURS..AS EVERYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD DREAMS...

2009-06-11T04:06:00.009-05:00

Yes, one can feel quite alone when it is 4am in the morning, and it's not as though you don't WANT to go to sleep.

You SO would love that.
You SO would have loved that hours ago...

But you are a person that quickly learns survival techniques when needed...

If you want to work nights and make the big bucks, you gotta stay up the night
before you begin your stretch, to make sure that you sleep before you work the
next night..
The following days to sleep take care of themselves...

Simple..

Or you would think so, yet honestly, it appears as though many do not adhere to that simple technique, hence the incredible number of night shift employees literally falling over in an almost unconscious state...

I have actually heard slight snoring, thinking that it was one of the many patients,
only to turn around and see the head nurse in a slightly catatonic state...

This is simply not going to be me...I would rather suffer the night before, and
stay awake during my shift...

I have never been a "public" sleeper...
Kind of a private thing for me...
Any extremely vulnerable state is and this is no exception...

Drooling is just not attractive, unless controlled, (i.e. my avatar of red lips
with a slight drip of drool...that's artistic...if not downright fabulous..)

As far as an uncontrolled amount of drooling, I will avoid it as long as any self respecting woman can!
(Hence the difficulty in TRULY getting any serious sleep on a plane...)

So, here I am writing a new entry at a peculiar time...

Lucky for you, I am going to post three really great recipes...
You're gonna love em...trust me....

Why?

Well they're all three what I like to call "summer friendly" ones...

Two of them are cool and tasty beverages....

What's not to love about that during these sweltering times? (and it's just beginning !)

For those of you that don't have 100 plus degree weather for months on end, then
as we like to say in these here parts....
Bless yer little hearts! (this is Texas slang for you know what...)

I digress...
Back to the beverages....

One of them has alcohol, or as we say in the hospital biz...ETOH
Gotta love that for brunch...
You know you do!

(I used to as well, but do try to stay away from it these days, unless a large
nap is on the menu after brunch)
Something about a cocktail or two at 1PM...Not the same effect as an evening one..

Well, honestly, I find a great Bloody Mary hard to pass up...
Where I live, great and spicy Bloody Marys are the standard at a lot of places...

I still contend though, that the VERY BEST SPICY Bloody Mary (my favorite) can
be found in Manhattan...

Yep, Manhattan in the Flatiron District at Bobby Flay's restaurant, Mesa Grill...
Try not to miss a Brunch opportunity there when I am visiting...

Always a toss up...Norma's or Mesa? Two favorites...

Now I also love a place that my family likes to brunch that has a "Bloody Mary
Bar"...

Very nice, all set up with the "fixins" and after you get your vodka and
ice from the waiter, you go to the "Bar" to make your own version with a large variety of great ingredients...

I KNOW that it is why we love this place for brunch, though the small jazz band
and the food IS delicious as well...

I will also post a beverage that is non alcoholic and wonderful..
Peach Iced Tea...the very name screams SUMMER

Finally a very refreshing Pasta Salad with Grilled Chicken, Arugula Pesto, Feta
Cheese, olives, and seasonal red, yellow, and any color grape tomatoes...
We have Emeril to thank for this one...

These recipes work well for a light brunch/lunch.
Round it out with some great crispy rolls and maybe a light fruit dessert...You decide...

I'm thinking Key Lime Pie, but then again, I've been on that same note lately,
so do take that into consideration...

SOUTHWESTERN BLOODY MARY (VERY SPICY)

6 SERVINGS

3 CUPS CANNED VEGETABLE JUICE
2 TABLESPOONS FRESH LEMON JUICE
1 TABLESPOON MINCED FRESH CILANTRO
1 TABLESPOON WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE
1 TEASPOON FINELY MINCED SEEDED CANNED CHIPOTLE CHILIES
1 TEASPOON GROUND CUMIN
1 TEASPOON SUGAR
2/3 CUP CHILLED GOOD QUALITY VODKA (LIKE GREY GOOSE OR CHOPIN OR BELVEDERE)

ICE CUBES
6 CELERY STALKS WITH LEAFY TOPS
6 FRESH RED CHILIES

MIX FIRST 7 INGREDIENTS IN PITCHER.
CHILL MIXTURE UNTIL COLD, AT LEAST 2 HOURS OR OVERNIGHT (BEST)

MIX IN VODKA

FILL 6 TALL GLASSES WITH ICE.
POUR BLOODY MARY MIXTURE OVER.

GARNISH WITH CELERY AND CHILIES

PEACH ICED TEA

3 ORANGE PEKOE TEA BAGS
4 CUPS COLD WATER
5 (5 OUNCE) CANS PEACH NECTAR (ABOUT 3 1/3 CUPS), CHILLED
1/4 CUP CHILLED SIMPLE SYRUP OR TO TASTE

SIMPLE SYRUP
1 1/3 CUPS SUGAR
1 1/4 CUPS WATER

PEACH SLICES AND BASIL SPRIGS FOR GARNISH

PLACE TEA BAGS IN A QUART SIZE GLASS MEASURE OR HEATPROOF BOWL.

IN A SAUCEPAN BRING WATER JUST TO A BOIL AND POUR OVER TEA BAGS. STEEP TEA 5
MINUTES AND STRAIN THROUGH A SIEVE INTO A HEATPROOF PITCHER. COOL TEA AND CHILL, COVERED, UNTIL COLD, ABOUT 1 HOUR.

STIR IN NECTAR AND SYRUP. SERVE TEA OVER ICE IN TALL GLASSES AND GARNISH WITH
PEACH SLICES AND BASIL SPRIGS.

TO MAKE SIMPLE SYRUP:
IN A SAUCEPAN BRING SUGAR AND WATER TO A BOIL, STIRRING, AND BOIL UNTIL SUGAR
IS COMPLETELY DISSOLVED. LET SYRUP COOL AND CHILL, COVERED. SYRUP MAY BE MADE 2 WEEKS AHEAD AND CHILLED, COVERED.

YIELD: MAKES ABOUT 2 CUPS
CAN DOUBLE OR TRIPLE

PASTA SALAD WITH ARUGULA PESTO, GRILLED CHICKEN BREASTS, AND FETA

1 LB. BONELESS, SKINLESS, CHICKEN BREASTS
OLIVE OIL
SALT
PEPPER
EMERIL'S "ESSENCE" SEASONING
1 BUNCH FRESH ARUGULA, TOUGH STEMS REMOVED, WASHED AND SPUN DRY, PLUS BABY ARUGULA, FOR GARNISH
1/2 CUP PACKED FRESH PARSLEY LEAVES
1/2 CUPS LIGHTLY TOASTED WALNUTS
2 TEASPOONS MINCED GARLIC
1/2 CUP GRATED PARMESAN
1 TEASPOON FRESH LEMON JUICE
1/2 TEASPOON SALT
1/4 TEASPOON GROUND BLACK PEPPER
1/4 CUP EXTRA VIRGIN OLIVE OIL
1/4 TO 1/2 CUP OLIVE OIL
1 LB. PENNE PASTA
1 PINT RED GRAPE TOMATOES, HALVED
1 PINT YELLOW GRAPE TOMATOES, HALVED
1 1/4 CUPS CRUMBLED FETA CHEESE (BEST TO USE GOOD QUALITY)
1/2 CUP ROUGHLY CHOPPED PITTED OLIVE-CURED OLIVES

PREHEAT A GRILL. DRIZZLE THE CHICKEN WITH OIL AND SEASON WITH SALT, PEPPER, AND ESSENCE. PLACE ON THE GRILL AND COOK UNTIL COOKED THROUGH, ABOUT 4 MINUTES
ON THE FIRST SIDE, AND 5 MINUTES ON THE SECOND SIDE.
REMOVE THE CHICKEN FROM THE GRILL AND CUT INTO CUBES.

IN A FOOD PROCESSOR, COMBINE THE ARUGULA, PARSLEY, WALNUTS, GARLIC, CHEESE, LEMON JUICE, SALT, AND PEPPER, AND PROCESS ON HIGH SPEED UNTIL THE GREENS ARE FINELY CHOPPED. WITH THE MACHINE RUNNING, ADD THE EXTRA-VIRGIN OLIVE OIL AND 1/4 CUP OF
THE OLIVE OIL IN A STEADY STREAM AND PROCESS UNTIL SMOOTH.

BRING A LARGE POT OF SALTED WATER TO A BOIL. ADD THE PASTA AND COOK UNTIL AL DENTE.
DRAIN THE PASTA AND SHOCK IN AN ICE BATH AND PLACE IN A BOWL. TOSS WITH SOME OLIVE
OIL SO IT DOESN'T STICK.

TOSS THE PASTA WITH THE ARUGULA PESTO TO TASTE. LET COOL WITH PLASTIC WRAP, AND REFRIGERATE UNTIL WELL CHILLED. TOSS THE CUBED CHICKEN, RED AND YELLOW TOMATOES, FETA, AND OLIVES TO THE PASTA, AND TOSS TO COMBINE. ADJUST THE SEASONING TO TASTE, AND SERVE GARNISHED WITH BABY ARUGULA.

SERVES 4-6 MAINS

NEW RECIPE, BREAKFAST, ELOISE, AND A PASSION FOR ROOM SERVICE

2009-06-09T22:26:00.018-05:00

I am absolutely NOT a breakfast person, nor have I ever been.

Now by that, I mean that I do not like to eat directly upon rising.

My stomach must wake up first. This takes at least a couple of hours.
There are three times when I DO love to eat breakfast, though.

1. For Dinner
2. For Brunch (late)
3. Room Service in a fabulous hotel

Ah, Room Service...gives me the chills just to mention it..

I adore Room Service, especially for Dinner.

It's terribly decadent to chilax in a beautifully decorated hotel room, order a
must-see movie on the tube, put on a plush hotel provided bathrobe, and order Room service....

Room Service Dinner with a very Dry Martini...Nirvana

Then there is Breakfast Room Service.

I do less of this, but have been known to do it, as it gives me time to get ready for whatever I am doing for the day.
Breakfast brought on a gorgeous cart...
Perfect start to the day!

I ALWAYS order the same, but very much adored Breakfast....

I LOVE a fruit, granola, and yogurt parfait...Almost every Hotel that I have stayed
in, has a version of this.

It's pretty, light, and satisfying, and you almost feel as though you are having dessert for Breakfast...

With the addition of two beautiful silver pots containing hot freshly made coffee and another with cold water,
a fresh flower in a small vase,
sometimes the addition of a homemade muffin,
real silver flatware and cloth napkins...
Hmmm...and all I have to do is sign?

I love that they want to pour your first cup...

I am, and always will be,
A "LUX HOTEL DIVA"

There is no denying it,
or any end to it.

When making plans for a trip, the Food and the Hotel are MAJOR COMPONENTS...

(A big apology to my family, who don't claim to know where I came from, as I
was not raised to be who I am today.)

One must realise that "Eloise" was my favorite childhood book.
When I first visited "The Plaza Hotel" in New York, I felt like I was home!
"Eloise" was everywhere!

My first little friend!

www.eloisewebsite.com

I dreamed of living at "The Plaza" just like Eloise.
Eloise first introduced me to Room Service and Lux Hotels.

It's all Eloise's fault...

Why they even have "Eloise Weekend Packages" at the Plaza...

Completely outrageous, of course...

Question...

Have you ever had dessert for Breakfast?

Oh C'mon now, let's get real...

I can't be the only one...

I remember that on a talk show one time, Sylvester Stallone, who is big on keeping
his body healthy and very much in shape, mentioned that if you ARE going to eat dessert, that you should always consider eating it in the morning, so that you can burn it off the rest of the day.

I have never been a huge believer in the "don't ever eat after a certain time" etc, because I have a friend that is a Dietitian who promises that your body does not know what time it is, and that the calories one takes in and burns has nothing to do with the actual time of the day...(This is somewhat nice to think about working night shift!)

I HAVE certainly, in my time, had dessert for breakfast..

That last piece of Limeade Pie? (Yes, I CAN plug my recipes on my own website! See previous post "Renaissance Women Post a Poem and a Pie", (great picture, poem not
too shabby either...)

You Shameless Wench!

Back to dessert for Breakfast....

How bout a quickly heated up piece of last night's Apple Pie?

I also have had a couple of homemade cookies with coffee, and sometimes if available, a piece of cake...

I like savory breakfasts, but more so for dinner or brunch (late)

Ever had a really great cinnamon roll for breakfast? YUM!

Now, none of these are very healthy, grant you, (save the parfait.)

I am now going to post a recipe for an addition to your other "go to" Breakfast recipes/traditions.

I think that it solves the dilemma of trying to have something healthy (yogurt, granola, fresh fruit, nuts), and having your Breakfast sweet as well.

This one comes from Caprial and John's kitchen, those wonderful chefs in Oregon..

BREAKFAST FRUIT CRISP

SERVES 12

TOPPING:

1 cup flour
1 cup granola
1/2 cup toasted hazelnuts or pecans
1/4 cup coconut (could delete if you don't like...SHAME ON YOU!..See "Coconut Cravings")
1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 cup unsalted butter

FILLING:
2 pints raspberries or blackberries
2 pints strawberries, hulled and quartered
1 cup sugar
Pinch ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

Garnish:
2 cups vanilla yogurt
Fresh mint

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

For the topping place flour, granola, nuts, coconut, vanilla and brown sugar in a medium-sized bowl and mix well. Add the butter and mix with your finger tips until
the mixture resembles a coarse dough. Set aside.

For the filling, place berries, sugar, cinnamon, allspice, nutmeg, and vanilla in a large bowl and toss to mix. Place in a 9x11 inch baking dish. Crumble topping over berry mixture.

Bake for 30-40 minutes, or until topping is golden brown. Remove from the oven and allow to cool slightly.

To serve, place the warm crisp on plates and top with yogurt and mint...

YUM!

MISERY LOVES POETRY

2009-06-07T00:55:00.006-05:00

Last night I went to dinner with some old friends.
We meet on average about 5-6 times/year to catch up with each others lives.
It is almost always enjoyable, as dining with old friends tends to be.

I woke up yesterday from one of my MANY daytime naps,
(working nights screws up your sleeping system completely),
and realized that I would rather get another flu shot then go to dinner.

The inevitable, "how is your new job?"; "how are things with you?" questions were just not something that I felt like dealing with.

If I could have just answered "THEY SUCK!", and be done with it, I could have handled it.

Unfortunately people always must know the details...

I'm upset about the "details"...
I'm trying to get away from the "details"...
The "details" are making me miserable...

No, it's not the patients, even though at times they can get to be a bit "much" (refer to previous post...)

In a "Cliff Notes" version of my new job...

It is sort of like a milder though still potent version of "Lord of the Flies"

Remember that book?

Thematically it basically hones in on the "world" that one lives in, being run by a bunch of hoodlums, and no one is around to monitor their actions, etc.

Unfortunately it is like one big maniacal dysfunctional family that does NOT want new members...

One finds that out pretty quickly...
They cannot wait to let you know that you are "NOT LIKED"...
That pretty much sums up the new job...

Why, I have even gotten used to some of the nurses, who as I previously mentioned, would be a "shoo-in" in the Salem "Zombie Parade" next Halloween...with a little makeup job, who knows?
With very little coaching, these women could drop right into juicy roles in "Dawn
of the Dead Part 12"...

Well, unfortunately, I NEED this job...
If you have never HAD to stay at a job where you are quite unhappy, you cannot imagine what it feels like...

Almost like what I imagine an unwilling prostitute must feel like...

You have to be careful not to completely lose your humility...your spirit...the very eccense of who you are...

Frankly, this is all a bit too much for me at this time of my life...

Thank heavens that there are books...dreams...
Sometimes they are the only things that can get you through these difficult periods
in life...
So...
Favorite books as of late...

A THREE DOG LIFE by Abigail Thomas

NOT BECOMING MY MOTHER (and other things she taught me along the way)
by Ruth Reichl

JULIE AND JULIA by Julie Powell (reread because the movie is coming out, with a screenplay by Nora Ephron, starring Meryl Streep as a young Julia Childs)

SAVAGE BEAUTY (reread because I love it) by Nancy Milford about the life of
Edna St.Vincent Millay

And my newest favorite...didn't want this one to end!
I LOVED, I LOST, I MADE SPAGHETTI
by Giulia Melucci

Now for the dreaming part...it's not really dreaming...I just have not decided...
though "dreaming" about it always makes me feel better...

In the Fall I will go somewhere that makes me feel happy...

I just got through telling my older son that one should be "happy" wherever they
are..as happiness is INSIDE!
Well rehearsed parental BS...

Anyway...

I may go back to Boston perhaps, or very possibly, Montreal and Old Quebec City...
Am researching it now...MUST get passport

Don't get to take a very long vacation until Fall...
Until then, can only take 3 day off...

Plenty of time to fly to San Francisco, or visit my friend in Colorado

ANYTHING!!!!!

MUST ESCAPE WHENEVER POSSIBLE!!!!

Sorry this was not a more "cheerful" little passage....

Must revert to telling you stories of interest from the past until the present
is a prettier picture...

And now for the poetic side of me....

A POEM FOR THE PITIFUL
(or how to write something completely childish and feel much better afterwards...)

So you say
they don't like me.
Well, it's not
hard to see
that hurting
one's feelings
comes easily
to thee

Wish I could
tell you
"just go
get in line"
with all of
the rest of
the ignorant
swine.

But finding
a job
is too hard
to repeat.
I guess I'll
stay here
amongst
big smelly feet

I'll listen
to banter
so childish
and vain,
then come back
tomorrow
for more
of the same.

I vow
to be silent.
Don't have
much to share,
with those
who are rude
and are
missing
some
hair

Okay,
so it's not nice
to call you all
"swine"
With hair that is
thinning,
and smelly feet...
Fine!

A "Tet for a Tat"
Isn't that
how it goes?
One MUST not forget
to make
fun
of your
nose...

Is that one
a fake?
Oh c'mon
say it's so.
Tis a pity
the face
that must
wear it,
ya know..

Ah,
NOW I FEEL BETTER!
Why didn't I see
that poetry works
in such
strange ways
for me?....

Much better
than fighting
and stronger
than wine.
Don't care
if it's silly...
For laughter's
DIVINE!!!!

A HORROR STORY WITH A CHICKEN ENDING

2009-05-23T21:18:00.008-05:00

But of course I am still with you...
Just a bit mentally and physically exhausted..mostly mentally, but yes I am still around...
Thought I might share with you "Highlights" of my new job....

The first night I worked, as I was about to leave, my phone rang..

It was my boss, who called me to "warn me" or "prepare me" of the staff's mood due to the fact that my night shift manager, whom I had not met yet, has been fired...

He started the conversation by saying that there was no reason to worry...that
there was extra security on to oversee my new workplace...(there was no security
present when I went to work that night, by the way...)

This manager was a very long term employee...
I was to meet him and orient with him my first few weeks there...

Apparently he was being threatening as of late, and finally spit out the "big one"(very similar in my mind to saying the word "bomb" while standing in line at
an airport...)

He said that he was going to come up to work, bring his revolver, and "take some people out"...

Still don't know who he meant, but I've watched enough CNN/"Law and Order",to see that they usually just enter the department and blow everybody away and then themselves...

My boss added, "He doesn't even know what you look like"..

If that was suppose to be comforting, it SO wasn't..

It would be unusual for a whacked out nut to stop and say, "Hey, I don't know you, and wish you no harm, so please leave before the craziness starts..."

Nothing like the "first night jitters, eh?"

Anyway...never a dull moment...
On to other delights...

I have a psychotic patient right now, whom I took care of earlier this year at a different hospital.

At that time,I did not realize that he was psychotic, just knew that he was a little "different"...

He and his family were very, very kind and friendly to me...
Now after a traumatic surgery that none of us would want, he is full fledged
"NUTS TO THE MAX"...

Either he refused his needed medications or someone needs to adjust them (after
last night he is refusing ALL meds)

When I first heard about him in report, I did not recognize the name, but the therapist who gave me report on him, told me that he would not go in there anymore, because the patient was very abusive verbally to both the caregivers and his family.

At the time, I remember thinking, "you don't really have a choice, buddy, as the guy is on therapy..."

My first night to see this patient, was a couple of nights ago...I walked in, recognized him, and though he was quite strange, he seemed very "relieved" to
see me..

"Oh thank God you're here...someone that knows what they're doing", he remarked..

He then quickly followed that with, "Don't ask me anything...I cannot speak"
which, of course he could and was...(besides which, I wasn't asking him anything)

"Alrighty then", I thought...

I was quite surprised that he was the patient that I had taken care of before...
In the back of my head, I told myself, "he is treating everyone else horribly, and it is only a matter of time before YOU join the illustrious group of

"THE ABUSED CAREGIVERS"...

I also have ALWAYS believed that the "pedestal" is a very unlucky place to
be standing, as one always falls the hardest from that vantage point.

Last night, my premonition, or let's just call it "experience", proved to be all
too true...

There was a much unfortunate misunderstanding between his nurse and myself...
I was called to come up to see a patient who really needed me...
Unfortunately the nurse got the info wrong, and so I came up to see another
patient, who is always calling me to tend to him...

I did therapy with this patient, and after about a half an hour, came out to the desk and stayed out there for at least another 1/2 hour charting...

Suddenly the psychotic patient's wife, flung open his door and came out to the desk frantically saying to me..."DID YOU NOT KNOW THAT WE HAVE BEEN CALLING FOR YOU FOR TWO HOURS!!!???!!!???!!! WE TOLD THE NURSE TO CALL FOR YOU!!!!!DID YOU NOT KNOW?"

I of course told her that I did not, apologized, and was putting on my isolation gear and the wife, who knew me from before, said, "I know that you could not have known", which was true...

While I was putting on my gear to enter the room, I could hear through the door,
the screaming, not just from him, but the screaming between the two of them...

The night nurses glanced at me with pity, which is the first time they had shown any expression on their faces, other than disdain, since I have started working at this new place..

That's another story entirely, and I will not bore you with it.

Let's just say that the night nurses at my new job could use some "happy pills" or SOMETHING to make them appear more human...

(As it is, they are somewhat reminiscent of those that participated in the infamous "Zombie Parade" in Salem that I previously have blogged about...After
taking them all in for a couple of weeks, I KNOW that I've seen those faces
somewhere...Just hard to completely recognize them without their ghoulish makeup,
limping, and moaning...

Back to the "psychotic room"...

I entered...I had not even opened the door all the way, before the "FIRE OF WRATH"
came upon me like a "DRAGON IN HEAT"

I will not elaborate, but let's just say, that I tried my best to apologize for the misunderstanding, the wife told him "Nicole DID NOT KNOW!" several times, but none of this was listened to...

The patient DID need me to quickly alleviate a problem he was having, and making worse with his yelling, swinging, hysterical ranting, and I still went to his bedside and did what I needed to do to take care of his physical need at that
time...

I was not able to do this, without dodging and swaying, because this guy wanted to kill me AND his wife...

Have you ever seen a three year old screaming and swinging his arms and legs and throwing himself on the floor at a grocery store or somewhere?

Picture this scene with a grown man who also has a firm grasp on the very worst
of the English language, or slang I should say, who also wants to take those around him down, and you've got the picture...

Oh and then picture me, right next to the bed, doing my thing to help him breathe, swinging and dodging in and out of the bed...

I had to take off the gadget that lets him talk, and he was still yelling, though
could not be heard, and when his wife told him "you can't talk right now", well...that is where he really got ballistic...

Miraculously I emerged physically unscathed, and my gown and gloves helped me
out, still

I really don't appreciate having a nightmare with even more outrageous and
magnified images of this "scene" taking the star role.....

Too bad you can't decide what you're going to dream about...
Wouldn't THAT be cool?

Wonder if that will be possible in the future?
Kind of like renting a DVD, but you could rent a "dream" and somehow be able
to "play" it as you slept...

Bizarre?

Not out of the question, when you think of a cloned baby, etc...Stranger things
can happen even now...

I felt so sorry for this patient, and especially his wife, but on the other hand
I couldn't help but think,

"THEY REALLY DON'T PAY ME ENOUGH TO DO THIS!"

So...the beginning of my "orientation" to my new job has been, um, unusual, but
not boring...which is essential for a girl like me...

When I have come home in the morning, I have just fallen in bed, only to wake to
get ready and go back to this "dream job"...

There are other dynamics that make for an interesting first few weeks of my employment, but I feel that this is enough for the time being...

NOW FOR MY FOODIE FRIENDS, MY ABSOLUTELY BEST RECIPE IN THE WORLD FOR...

"MARINATED CHICKEN BREASTS"

This recipe is old, used many times, and is still, after trying many different recipes, the most delicious of all marinades....
Because of the fruit juice, it can have a tendency to burn, so watch it carefully, and remember that most people overcook their chicken.
Boneless chicken breasts cook very quickly, so try not to overdo it...
Anything over 5 minutes is too long...
I seriously think you will LOVE this recipe....

The taste is simply DIVINE!

Serves 6

Ingredients:

6 boneless, skinless breasts of chicken (6-7 ounces each)
46 ounces pineapple juice
16 ounces soy sauce
1 cup red wine vinegar
3 tablespoons sugar
1 garlic clove, minced

Combine pineapple juice, soy sauce, vinegar, sugar and garlic; mix until sugar is dissolved...

Pour marinade over chicken and let stand, refrigerated, for 24 hours, turning once and stirring marinade occasionally.

Remove chicken from marinade, drain and charcoal broil over medium fire for approximately 5 minutes. (of course you could grill it over gas, or other methods)

Serve on 6 inch hoagie rolls with romaine lettuce, red onion and tomato.

Of course you don't have to put it on the rolls...I usually don't...I serve it
along with sides...

This would also be great as just PART of your BBQ, along with ribs, steaks,
hamburgers, etc...OR
as the main star in a great salad with, hmm...maybe Ranch Dressing?
Or a great wrap?

You decide!

Hope you love this recipe as much as I do!

Wish you were here to go outside and grill it for me!

Oh well..
Later....
Nicole

CRAVING A STORMY SCRUMPTIOUS SUNDAY DINNER

2009-05-10T12:20:00.012-05:00

I think that I shared with you guys earlier in a post, that working night shift
illicits a continuous craving for home cooked yummy meals...

Well, and obviously coconut as well!

The likelihood of you getting to eat a scrumptious meal is pretty slim...
(unless you have a *wife..more about that in a minute...)

If you are not working, you tend to be sleeping or lazying around..

You certainly find it hard to get into the whole "cooking event" that a
Sunday-type dinner requires...

I am a newbie though...Maybe I will figure all of this out soon/and or will
find more energy to do it in the near future..

(Oh, and I don't have to tell you that all the guys that are married come
to work with Tupperware bowls filled to the brim with "homemade goodies" that
their *wives cooked and packaged for them...)

WHERE IS MY *WIFE???

THE CHEF????

A "MADE FOR ME" PARTNER THAT IS A BRILLIANT COOK?

Okay...now I'm just going overboard..

Might as well ask "where's my Johnny Depp?"

Paleeeeese...

Well, today, I don't feel like cooking this scrumptious meal..(plus there is no one around to help me eat it..son had to work...)
That doesn't mean that I don't have the recipes and know how to do it..
Can't fool you guys...You KNOW better....

These are "Storm-proof Meals", unless all of your electricity goes out..
If that happens, it's "head for the breakfast bars"...

It has certainly been a stormy season so far...

This meal was developed keeping the "storm" possibility in mind..(hence no
need for the grill)

So...Here is what I would have to eat today, "Mother's Day", if there were
someone to cook for me (and forget about "tea-time" sandwiches...I WANT SOME
REAL FOOD!)

Most of you will recognize some of the recipes that I have previously posted at
Foodbuzz....(the ribs being one of the most popular that I have ever posted..Yes,
they're THAT good)

One of them is new...The "Honey Jalapeno Glazed Corn Muffins"...
Love that sweet and spicy combination...

Hope that you make this meal and enjoy it...
I will continue to fantasize about it

The only other suggestions for this meal, is that you add a green salad,
coleslaw, or a quick green steamed veggie that you like...

I did not add dessert, as I don't know that one would want it after this meal,
but I am a huge fruit packed Popsicle freak (the Whole Foods kind), so that would
be my "light" dessert suggestion.

ENJOY!!!

OUTRAGEOUS OVEN BBQ RIBS
(FROM MY RECIPE BOX)

SERVES 3-4 (Can easily be doubled)
5 TABLESPOONS SUGAR
3 TABLESPOONS HONEY
3 TABLESPOONS SOY SAUCE
1 TEASPOON SALT
2 TABLESPOONS KETCHUP
1 CUP HOT CHICKEN BROTH
4 LBS SPARERIBS ( BE SURE TO ASK THE BUTCHER TO TRIM FAT AND SEPARATE BACK BONE, AS THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT STEP IN USING SPARERIBS…NO PROBLEM, THEY’LL DO IT…)

IN BOWL MIX ALL INGREDIENTS EXCEPT RIBS.
POUR MIXTURE OVER RIBS. (PUT THEM IN AN EXTRA LARGE ROASTING PAN.)
MARINATE IN REFRIGERATOR FOR 2 HOURS (MORE IF YOU LIKE, THOUGH NOT NEEDED)
BAKE AT 300 DEGREES FOR 3 HOURS, UNCOVERED, BASTING EVERY 30 MINUTES, AND
TURNING OCCASIONALLY.

HOT PEPPER CHEESE AND GARLIC MASHED POTATOES
(FROM "THE OLD HOUSE" RESTAURANT IN SANTE FE)

6 SERVINGS (WELL MAYBE…)

10 garlic cloves (unpeeled)

3 1/2 lbs russet potatoes, peeled, cut into 2-inch pieces

2 TBLSP. olive oil
1/4 cup chopped shallots
1/4 cup butter, room temperature
1 cup grated hot pepper Monterey Jack cheese
3/4 cup sour cream

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Wrap garlic in foil
Roast until tender, about one hour.
Peel, (wait until cooled then squeeze garlic cloves out of peel…)
Place in small bowl; mash with fork.

Cook potatoes in pot of boiling water until tender, about 25 minutes.
Drain.

Heat oil in same pot over medium heat.
Add garlic and shallots and saute’ for 2 minutes.

Add potatoes, and cook until potatoes begin to fall apart, stirring occasionally for about 6 minutes.

Mash potatoes in pot.
Mash in butter, then cheese and sour cream.
Season with salt and pepper.

SWEET CORN ON THE COB
(FROM FANNIE FARMER'S)

Just before cooking, husk the corn, pull off the silky threads, and cut out any blemishes with a pointed knife. Drop the corn into a large pot filled with boiling salted water. Cover the pot and let the water return to a boil again, then turn off the heat and keep the pot covered. After about 5 minutes, remove enough ears for a first serving. You can keep the remaining corn warm in the water for another 10 minutes without its becoming tough. Serve with lots of butter and salt.

HONEY JALAPENO GLAZED CORN MUFFINS
(FROM "FAMOUS DAVE'S BBQ")
SERVES ABOUT 8

1 cup yellow cornmeal
1 cup stone ground cornmeal
1 (9 ounces) package yellow cake mix
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon cayenne
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup buttermilk
1/4 cup vegetable oil
2 eggs, beaten
2 tablespoons light brown sugar
2 tablespoons honey
1 tablespoon mayonnaise

Jalapeño Honey Glaze:
1/2 cup butter
1 large jalapeño pepper, seeded, finely diced
3 tablespoons red bell pepper, finely diced
1/4 cup honey
1/8 teaspoon cayenne
Instructions:

Combine both cornmeals, cake mix, baking powder, salt and cayenne in
a bowl, set aside.

Combine milk, buttermilk, oil, eggs, brown sugar and honey in a bowl and mix well. Add to the Cornmeal mixture and mix gently - there should be no lumps, but do not over mix. Fold in the mayonnaise. Let rest, covered, in the refrigerator for 30 minutes or up to overnight.

Preheat oven to 400° F. Spoon the cold batter into a greased muffin tin or a cast iron skillet. Bake for 25 - 30 minutes or until a cake tester comes out clean and the top is golden brown.

In the meantime, make the glaze by heating butter in a saucepan until melted. Stir in jalapeno and bell pepper. Bring to a simmer. Stir in honey and cayenne. Bring
to a simmer, stirring occasionally. Remove from heat.
Drizzle over muffins/cornbread.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL OF YOU MOTHERS!!!
YOU HAVE EVERY INCH OF MY RESPECT!!!
BEEN THERE...DOIN THAT!

"LOCKER LOONINESS" AND THE "LITTLE THINGS"

2009-05-08T05:17:00.008-05:00

Thought I dropped off the earth?
To be honest, it has felt that way the last week..

I have been orienting on DAYS for my new job....
As you recall, I am now a NIGHT PERSON...
My equilibrium is out of whack...

I do my first orienting on night shift tonight..
It should be interesting...

Just finding a place to lock up my things appears to be "a challenge"
They don't have enough lockers...

No hospitals ever do...You would think that "lockers" were gold and contained
precious jewels...

Hospitals care about security for the patients, but when it comes to
the employees....well.....not so much...

I am continually cross examined as to WHY I "feel the need" to lock up my
belongings during my 12 hour shift...

This even led to a conversation this week about how my new coordinator does
not even lock her home...

Completely BIZARRE...Do these people not watch the news? Do they not receive
weekly fliers on their doors from the police department concerning new warnings
of crime and theft in their areas?

I do..

I chose a long time ago not to live in "never-neverland"...
Suppose these folks still reside there...

I have found from a lot of recent experience that because no one EVER cares about the "locker issue", one has to go about fixing it "on their own".

I was taken to my new department only once during the last few days of orientation.
I asked the day manager to help me with a locker...

He looked at the lockers (as if he has never noticed them), and said...
"Hmmm...I don't know...We don't really have enough..."

I saw where many (on days and nights) had big lockers to themselves...

How silly of me to think that those could be shared!!!....

I asked a couple of therapist present if they would "share" with me...

I told them that I carried my own lock and would remove it in the morning when
they came to work...

Both men looked at me as if I had asked them to leave their first born on
someone's front porch....

"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" they declared with the confidence of "Kings of the Kingdom"

The Manager told me..."um..well most of these guys have been here a long time,
and they are NOT going to want to share their lockers..."

FOR GOD'S SAKE...DID THEY BUY THE LOCKERS THEMSELVES?

ARE THEY FILLED WITH DRUGS AND PORNOGRAPHY?

WHAT'S INSIDE OF THE LOCKERS THAT THESE MEN DO NOT WANT SEEN?

I am quite aware of what it is though...

It's the ol "That's my toy, and YOU can't play with it"

I know because I experienced this phenomenon before..

As I recall I was about 5 years old...

Ridiculous...

This hospital is not in the best part of town and leaving my stuff
in the car is not an option, so not sure what I will do....

"Well, honestly, I have worked here for 150 years, and NOTHING has ever been
stolen from me..."

(I hear this everywhere I go)

Talk to the hand...I am not the person to tell this to...I NEVER buy it...

It certainly has NOT been my experience...

I will utilize only ONE example...

The first trip that my then young son and I took to Disneyworld for 10 days!...
our luggage was stolen...NEVER to be retrieved...

Imagine having to buy clothes inside of Disneyworld..

A "world" where a small coke is $4.00.....

Also on that trip...my son goes into a park bathroom, and leaves his new precious "Mickey Mouse hat" on the sink (he was quite young, in his defense)...

Needless to say the "Mickey Mouse hat" was gone when he returned to the sink...

If I had NOTHING in my purse, it would be stolen, but in fact I DO carry my
credit cards, etc, because in a big city like this, and far from home,
YOU HAVE TO...

Sorry to go on and on about the "locker thing", but it does illustrate to me,
just how these "seemingly little things" are not really that "little" and DO
cause me concern, and frankly MORE than annoying feelings...

Furthermore, these "little things" are the reason for the ongoing inability to
submerge myself in "Meditation" and other helpful practices, that could help
calm down a relatively high stressed personality such as myself..

(Privately I've always maintained that a "meditational state" for a girl like me
is only possible during anesthesia or death....)

This "Locker Looniness" does not tend to make the "new person" feel welcomed...

Somehow I don't think that these "KINGS" care very much about that...

Heck, that's probably a practice that's "out of date"...

Who am I kiddin?

Next I'll be requesting the location of the ladies room!!!

(Whoa girl...settle down..)

Looks like a little "high maintenance" is at play here...

NOTE TO SELF...Figure out everything yourself..

Oh the JOYS of being the "new person"...

Wake me up when it's over...

COCONUT CRAVINGS

2009-04-30T01:15:00.012-05:00

I know that it's not Easter..
There is a reason for the Bunny Cake..

This post is about all that's been Coconut in my life...

Both Past and Present

Most of the time I just have to crave coconut..

I crave it because I never get to have it.

Occasionally if I am out and the opportunity arises, I grab it and enjoy my love
for it.

Coconut and raisins have something very big in common.

Your love or hate for both is PRONOUNCED..

You either LOVE raisins or you HATE them.

THERE IS NO "HEM-HAWING" AROUND CONCERNING YOUR FEELINGS..

Same with Coconut.

I love them both.

Most of my family cannot tolerate coconut, thus I never make anything with it or
get to have anything made with it, myself.

Oh sure, I can buy an "Almond Joy", but I can never make a coconut creme pie, because no one will eat it...ditto for cake...macaroons...anything that is
"coconut scrumptious"!

My love for coconut has been a lifelong love affair.

My earliest recollections are tied with Easter, where the "Easter bunny" would
leave chocolate coconut "nests" with jelly beans in them, and also coconut creme
eggs in my Easter basket.

My Mother almost always made a "Bunny Cake" for Easter when we were young..
She was always so proud of it, and we loved it...
I will never forget a black and white photo of my Mother standing behind her
"bunny" creation, and looking just as proud as she could be!
(Note..her cake was actually much cuter than the one I posted, but I could not
find one as cute as hers..this is quite similar...)

I am not a fan of savory coconut items, i.e. "coconut chicken", but if it is
sweet and contains coconut, I am all over it...

My favorite is any wonderful COCONUT LAYER CAKE...

The cake itself should be light and moist, and the filling should be quite yummy.
My favorite filling would be a thin layer of lemon curd, but I am not opposed to other fillings if they are fab...
The frosting can be anything from a "7 minute" to a lightly whipped cream cheese
or cream one; and all should be topped with a generous topping of freshly grated and/or toasted coconut...

Now if this piece of Coconut Cake is several layers, and sitting in a lovely
pool of creme anglaise, I will not, I repeat, WILL NOT kick it out of bed, so to
speak...
As a matter of fact, I will not just LOVE it, I will ADORE IT!

COCONUT CREAM PIE...

Is there anything more delicious when it is really good? Topped with toasted
coconut and whipped cream? (I'm not a meringue fan..)

I made a point to try the infamous Coconut Cream Pie at Tom Douglas's restaurant,
"The Dahlia Lounge" in Seattle, and found it to be pretty yummy...Very fresh...
with fresh coconut used.
I recommend "The Dahlia Lounge", or any of his restaurants if you visit Seattle
(I believe that he has 3 or 4 different ones there, all with excellent reviews..)

COCONUT MACAROONS...

The recipe for COCONUT MACAROONS using Eagle Brand Milk is so easy, it can be made in a snap with only about 3 ingredients as I recall...
I remember that my Mother made these in a chocolate version when our Priest came
to visit us at home...
(Once again...funny about my childhood memories...see,what did I tell you? Whenever
food is involved...see previous post about childhood memories..)

Here is another childhood memory about food, and particularly coconut...

When I was at our church "fair" as a child, I was playing "musical chairs"...No
real skill involved in this game, but luck is the key, and it must have been my "lucky day", because I won three times!!
The winner got to pick a cake to take home.
I,of course, got to pick three cakes.
Two out of three that I picked were COCONUT!!

I am very "LOYAL WHEN IT COMES TO LOVE"...
My Love for Coconut is no exception..

COCONUT CUPCAKES...

Barefoot Contessa has a very good recipe for these..
(They can also be bought in a "mix" form that includes a mix for both the
cupcakes and the frosting..expensive but quite good..all of her "mixes" are very good...though you pay for the "convenience")

My favorite cupcake at "Sprinkles" is the Madagascar Vanilla with Coconut Cream
Cheese Frosting...(doesn't that just wanna make you weep? SO GOOD!!!)

COCONUT ICE CREAM...

Believe it or not, this is not an easy ice cream to come by...
It's certainly not at every ice cream parlor...
When you DO get a wonderful version though..it's Heaven...

Let's pause for another quick childhood foodie memory...
(oh pahleese..when do these end?...NEVER!!!!)

When I was a child,(yawn), my family stopped at Howard Johnson's restaurant for
ice cream cones on the way home from my Grandfather's.
We got the coconut ice cream, and we all remember how we stood outside the
restaurant on those hot summer nights, and ate that wonderful coconut ice cream
cone as it melted and dripped down our arms from the heat.
It was such a mess but SO GREAT that we didn't care...

Well, I could go on and on..(duh)

Now don't think that I have forgotten "coconuts haystacks" or other wonderful coconut delights, but I am out of time, and I simply must tell you one last "Coconut" story and leave you with a recipe as well...

When I LOVE something, I do try to find the very best of it, and if I find myself
visiting the area that "it" is in, I don't leave without making a point to try
it..
Our vacation in Charleston was no exception to that rule..

I had read ahead of time, that there was a wonderful restaurant there that was
known worldwide for their version of coconut cake..Why people order it from all
over the country for $100.00 plus shipping..(Whoa..it better be good, eh?)
The restaurants that makes this delectable cake is...

drumroll paleese...

THE PENINSULA GRILL www.peninsulagrill.com/

DO take a look at the actual coconut cake if you go to the website, as it is
divine beyond description...( and yes, it sits in a pool of creme anglaise..)

Even though the Peninsula Grill is an award winning restaurant, there were many,
many wonderful restaurants in Charleston, and I did not particularly want to eat dinner there specifically, but HAD to have a piece of their coconut cake.

My son and I stayed at the incredible Charleston Place Hotel which was right
across the street. I asked our concierge if it would be okay to go across the
street and request just a piece of the cake to go....

He laughed and said that people did it ALL THE TIME...

I went across the street, (with my son moaning...he is one of the ones that HATES
coconut, besides which he was a bit embarrased because the restaurant is quite
nice, and he thought that my request was really lame...As usual, I paid absolutely
no attention, as I was on a MISSION!... which is how I've survived many things,
but we will go into that another time....)

Sorry, I digress...

We entered through the beautiful bar, filled to the brim with "beautiful people"...

I finally got the bartender's attention, and within 20 minutes,( I ordered drinks for both of us..), I got the "legendary" cake...

It came in a Styrofoam container that was big enough to contain a meal for 4
people! The reason for that was because the coconut cake was..... get ready....

TWELVE LAYERS!!!!!!(including cake, filling, and frosting)

It's really a shame that I could only finish about a third of it, as my son did
not want any, and we were not staying at a hotel with a fridge, but OH MY...

If that wasn't a culinary highlight in one's life, I don't know what would be.

If you love coconut cake, then you can either order it, visit the restaurant in
Charleston, or though it looks a bit daunting...MAKE IT!

The following is a 3 layer version, with ingredients cut down just a bit...

If you want the 6 layer version, then visit Martha Stewart's website, which
has published the 6 layer version...

Both versions are the "REAL DEAL"....

(note that this is something that must be made in two days, as the filling must
be refrigerated overnight...Finished cake must also sit out for three hours before
serving...and I've read that cutting is best done while still chilled)

DO let me know if you make this, as I would love to know how it came out!

Peninsula Grill coconut cake (the 3 layer version)

Makes 12 servings

FILLING

2 tablespoons cornstarch

2 tablespoons water

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 ¼ cups whipping cream

½ cup sugar

½ cup (1 stick) unsalted butter

2 ¼ cups sweetened flaked coconut

¼ cup sour cream

CAKE

3 ½ cups all purpose flour

1 tablespoon baking powder

½ teaspoon salt

2 ¼ cups sugar

1 ½ cups (3 sticks)

unsalted butter, room temperature

5 large eggs

1 1/3 cups whipping cream

1 tablespoon vanilla extract

FROSTING

2 8-ounce packages cream cheese, room temperature

½ cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, room temperature

2 cups powdered sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

4 cups sweetened flaked coconut, toasted

For filling: Stir cornstarch, 2 tablespoons water, and vanilla in small bowl to dissolve cornstarch. Bring cream, sugar, and butter to boil in heavy medium saucepan. Add cornstarch mixture and bring to boil. Remove from heat and stir in coconut. Cool completely. Mix in sour cream. Cover and refrigerate overnight.

For cake: Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Butter and flour three 9-inch round cake pans. Whisk flour, baking powder and salt in large bowl to blend. Using electric mixer, beat sugar and butter in another large bowl to blend. Add eggs 1 at a time, beating well after each addition. Beat in cream and vanilla. Stir flour mixture into butter mixture. Divide batter equally among pans. Bake until tester inserted into center of cakes comes out clean, about 35 minutes. Cool completely.

For frosting: Using electric mixer, beat cream cheese and butter in large bowl to blend. Beat in powdered sugar and vanilla extract.

Place 1 cake layer on cake plate. Top with half of filling. Place second cake layer atop filling. Top with remaining filling. Place third cake layer atop filling. Spread frosting over top and sides of cake. Pat toasted coconut over top and sides of cake, pressing gently to adhere. (Can be prepared up to 1 day ahead. Cover and refrigerate. Let stand at room temperature 3 hours before serving

NICOLE ON NIGHTSHIFT, NEGATIVITY, AND NONSENSE

2009-04-28T00:55:00.020-05:00

I cannot begin to explain the changes that occur when you decide to work nights instead of days..
Here I will do my best...

The changes I speak of are not all negative nor are they all positive.

Many of them are tied to one's own perspective, as all things in life tend to be.

I will cover the negative aspects first, just to "get them out of the way.."

I have now worked 12 hour nightshift, weekends, for over a month.
I think that I have some sort of realistic "grasp" on the situation.

NEGATIVES:

1. Turns out that one's "sleep regimen" has a strong tendency to want to stay
"regular". That is to say, that if you tend to sleep days, in order to work nights, that is what your body is pleading to do even on your off days. So far, I have not been able to trick my body into sleeping nights on my days off.
Total Bummer..(hopefully that will change..)

2. Due to the above, one does not see or spend much time with ANYONE in their lives, as everyone else sleeps at night and is up during the day. This is especially not ideal with your family.

3. I don't need to mention, that EVERY gathering/party/get-together, is on the weekend...
Honestly, I do not "see" anyone at this point in my life, so working nights is not much of a "relationship" problem for me, but I DO miss seeing a couple of my friends that I normally see on weekends, and I DO get invitations that I have to RSVP "NO" to, and I DON'T like that one bit!

I will be lucky if I have ANY friends left after making this work change. (And don't think get some new "night shift" friends..
Most, so far anyway, are married with families, or...well...just "different"..)

4. Eating habits are horrific, and craving "good" food is constant. I personally DO NOT snack all night at work as some do (people tend to do this to keep awake, I think), but I don't ever seem to get a decent meal, as I bring something for a meal at night, usually something quick like a sandwich or a salad from Corner Bakery, then I get home and just fall in bed...hence, I dream of a meal with meat, veggies, salad, etc...and yes, I feel too tired to make it myself...

5. I DO feel a bit lonely at night on my nights off, as no one is up and also I cannot do things that I would like to for fear of waking my son/neighbors up
(i.e. playing my piano, cooking, cleaning, basically making any noise...)

6. One cannot go to a movie, shop, or "go out" anywhere in the middle of the night....
It's a drag...

OKAY! On to the POSITIVES!!! YEAH!!!!(don't we just ABHOR negative thoughts?)

(Personally I don't feel that way, as it appears to be THE KEY in terms of my
creativity when it comes to writing poetry or creating humorous "shtick" etc. ...
God knows if I am ever really positive or gleefully happy, I probably won't have another creative thought or action..)

And while I'm on the subject...

I DO NOT compare myself in any way with these people, but where would
we be without good old honest negativity?

Do you think that there would be any literature/poetry from the likes of Edgar
Allen Poe, Sylvia Plath, Oscar Wilde, Dorothy Parker, Edna St. Vincent Millay,
or Truman Capote?..
I could go on and on...

All of these amazing writers had an underlying "negative" yet creative attitude.
It was imperative to help drive their works of literature...

Now THIS is rather interesting...I'm actually not one for enjoying or being around anyone in a "bad mood" and especially critical of it in the work place, but I simply must share this bit of research with you...

"Bad moods, negative attitudes at work have gotten a bad rap"

FROM RICE NEWS STAFF REPORTS

Coming to work in a bad mood just might be a good idea. As it turns out, those perennially happy, smiling employees might not be the most creative or productive at the office. According to research by Rice University’s Jing Zhou, creativity is at its highest when a mix of negative and positive moods is supported in the workplace, an idea that challenges traditional management thinking.

For years, negativity has been considered an unavoidable — and unfortunate — part of organizational life; it’s something that should be minimized, criticized, even stamped out. But if employers want creativity that leads to innovation in the workplace, those naturally occurring bad moods can play a fruitful role; in fact, they’re necessary to make things better. Such creativity happens, according to Zhou, associate professor of management at the Jesse H. Jones Graduate School of Management, when employees have the right kind of supervisory support.

Interesting...thought provoking....

To be honest, I have always ABHORRED those annoying little "smiley faces"
and too much of what I call "happy wappy" paraphernalia....

Things like-
"I'M THE PROUD MOM OF AN HONOR ROLL STUDENT" and
"HAVE A NICE DAY" bumper stickers, make me want to
SWALLOW A STRYCHNINE COCKTAIL!!!

If you have read my blog from the beginning, then you know how I feel about the NEVER ENDING phenomenon concerning the daily question or someone's confession of whether they're the "glass half full" or "glass half empty" type...

Guess what? You're neither...You're the "glass half nauseating type"
SO WISH I COULD SAY THAT...

How in the world did we survive or describe ANYTHING before the advent of
that cutesy annoying little phrase?

I DID promise a "Positive" side of nightshift working didn't I?

1. It pays a lot more, which is quite nice, and is quite needed/appreciated.

2. You can FIND a full time job with benefits at night, but you cannot find
one on days..

3. People are a lot more "laid back"

4. The workplace is a lot less stressful. You don't have to contend with other
departments/therapists/physicians.
They can make getting to your patient and their charts a daily nightmare.

5. The nightshift staff is a smaller group of people, and appear to be a more
supportive and cohesive group. (I'm hoping to see that at my new job as well)

6. I don't have to get up at 4:30 AM anymore, something that even after all of
these years, was killing me.

7. I get to sleep during the day, and don't have to feel guilty about it like
people sometimes do when they take a LONG NAP.

8. You get to use your "critical skills", because at night you and those around
you are "on your own"..

9. It's kind of cool at the hospital, sort of scary and yet intriguing as well...
(see picture of empty corridor in hospital)

10. After complaining about the "loneliness" (#5 under negatives), I must be
honest and say that there is nothing like being able to write, read, etc
and not have any noise or interruptions...I actually quite like that...

In summary, I suppose that it is a very big change, yet not unlike any other
lifestyle change that one experiences...It will take some getting used to.

Everything has its good and bad points.

Trick is to make the most of the "good" points and ignore the bad ones.

(Watch out!...You're sounding a bit "positive!" Don't want to cramp that
all important "creativity" of yours!)

Which reminds me of something...

Awhile back my son had his game glaring and I was trying to write, and I said, "Son please turn that down!", and he said "It's not that loud, Mom...What's the deal?"

I said, "You're interfering with my creative process!"

Ever since, he loves to use that whenever it seems to fit into the situation or even when it doesn't...

"Well, Mother, I certainly wouldn't want to interfere with your CREATIVE PROCESS!"

(cheeky boy....)

"I FEEL PRETTY, OH SO PRETTY"

2009-04-24T00:22:00.008-05:00

"BITTER TASTING"

SHAME on you,
for what you said,

for "honesty",
the "truth"

a LOVELY girl,
i was your WIFE!

you made me
hate my youth

you "LIKED" me but

"as far as LOVE,

and this is REALLY tough...

though you're THE BEST,

i feel,

you're just not

BEAUTIFUL enough"

why even on our "honeymoon"
it took no time
for you to swoon
at pretty girls
most everywhere

i should have LEFT you
then
and there

you wanted
what you didn't have

so i was out
i guess

why to this day
you're SIMPLE

and your mind
grows less
and less

your looks have faded
haven't they?

so CRUEL
what time can do

but then
you know that "saying"
that
"it all comes back to you"

it took another marriage
most unfortunate,
but true

for me to realize
that i was
far too good
for you

too many of my "pretty" years
were spent with you
i'm sad to say

and sometimes
when i'm
insecure
your words
still HAUNT me
to this day

nicole
4/23/09

RETRO FANTASY DINNER PARTY

2009-04-21T18:07:00.010-05:00

It's one of the Season's most desirable invites...

One simply can't wait for their invitation to arrive!

It's certainly not a Party that one just "shows up to"

That just adds to the excitement...

The Party Premise was a challenging one, though not exactly taxing...

First a visit to a Retro or Costume Store...

Perhaps an appointment made at the Hairdresser's/Manicurist

Now...once those tasks are accomplished..
There are just a few requirements concerning the Food...

First, each participant or couple must bring a RETRO DISH...

Your particular requested category is included in your invitation...
Additionally...

One may bring anything within the category requested as long as it is...
1. Delicious
2. Homemade
3. Pre-1970s if possible (known as "Retro")
4. Something that you personally have either made before, was on your family
table growing up, or a recipe that your Mother or Grandmother is infamous for.
5. Cholesterol/carbs/or calories must be tossed to the wind..
6. Lastly, recipes of your dish must be provided for all that attend.

The very best thing about this "FANTASY RETRO DINNER" is that nothing particularly
HAS to go together, so no pre-planned menu coordination necessary.

We DO hope that we will have some categorical variety though...Need starters, main dishes, vegetables, salads, desserts....That was essential..hence the
requested categories included in the invitations..

The Host/Hosts will provide the cocktails, drinks, and appetizers...

Also provided, will be the music....
Included will be recordings by Connie Francis, Frank Sinatra, Elvis, Ella Fitzgerald, Peggy Lee, Fats Domino, Donovan, Bobby Darin, and The Supremes,
and last but certainly not least, The Doors...

Those in attendance are requested to don "Retro Attire"...
There are quite the "Fashionitas" in attendance, clothed in relics from different
time capsules...

As we scan the room, we take in the "scene" consisting of "Bobby socks" and "Pedal Pushers", short cropped sweaters with "Poodle" skirts, men in their 50s'
"pleathered bomber or flan gab jackets"..

Why, it is the most impressive sight!

Some women choose to display lacquered and coiffed hairdos with glamorous velvet padded shoulder jackets and sparkling "diamond" brooches..Gotta love the 40s'...

Hey..look over there! A couple of "flower children" have arrived.
The lovely lady (hmmm, wonder who that could be?) is in a floor length paisley empire waisted "Granny Gown Dress", along with small yellow flowers woven in her hair. No one can ignore her striking/glaring, "in your face", white patent "go-go boots" wrapping her legs...

Her date's impressive brown suede "fringed" jacket with a large silver dangling peace sign roams about his polyester striped shirt.
One wonders how he can walk in his ultra groovy platform shoes.

Dancing and music is all around us, and champagne glasses toast the night away...

Images of years past gloriously glisten before our eyes....

The guests are sparkling in their costumes

A "strobe" light turns the room around and round

Is that couple in the corner actually "necking?"

Why this is a bit RETRO isn't it?

RETRO PARTIES ROCK!!!! C'MON...YOU'RE ALL INVITED! HOPE YOU'RE HUNGRY!

THE MENU:

DRINKS: Sweetened Iced Tea, Sweet Milk (whole milk), Bottled Beer, and
Walt's Frozen Whiskey Sours

APPETIZERS: Doris's Hot Broccoli Dip with Corn Chips, Gran's Olive Cheese Nuggets,
Amy's Chinese Cheese Wafers, Small wedges of Julie's Quiche Lorraine.

SALADS: Cherry Coke Salad, Jay's Cucumber Salad, and Larry's Avocado Mousse

VEGETABLES: Stuffed Baked Tomatoes, May's Okra Patties, and Potato Casserole

MAINS: Mary's Meat Casserole, June's Beef Stroganoff, and Classic Cordon Bleu

BREAD: Nicole's Refrigerator Rolls

DESSERTS : Daniel's Divinity, Orange Pound Cake, Jeffrey's Bourbon Balls

APERITIF: Black Russians

RECIPES:

DRINKS:

No recipes for sweetened iced tea, sweet milk (whole milk), or bottled beer.

Walt's Whiskey Sours (Frozen), the "Yawin' and Pitchin' Variety" Serves 10-20

Ingredients:
1 quart water, 5 lemon rinds, 1 cup sugar, 1 pint lemon juice 1 1/2 quart whiskey

Boil rinds in sugar and water 5 minutes. Cool. Remove rinds. Add remaining ingredients. Put in freezer overnight. This will not freeze solid. Serve as slush
in champagne glasses. Is very potent.

APPETIZERS:

Doris's Hot Broccoli Dip: Serves 12
Ingredients:
3 stalks celery chopped medium fine, 1/2 large onion, chopped, 1 small can mushroom
pieces, drained, 1 pkg. frozen chopped broccoli, 1 can cream of mushroom soup,
1 roll garlic cheese (if you cannot find, then mix some garlic powder with small box of velvetta cheese.)

Saute' celery, onion and mushroom pieces in small amount **"oleo" or butter. Cook broccoli as directed on pkg. and drain very well. Add mushroom soup undiluted.
Melt cheese in double boiler. Combine all in chafing dish or any dish with a warmer. Serve with the large sized Fritos. Can also double as a "party vegetable". Freezes well.
**"oleo" is another name for margarine

Amy's Chinese Cheese Wafers:
Ingredients:
2 cups sharp cheddar cheese, grated, 2 cups Rice Krispies, 2 sticks oleo, 2 cups
flour, 1/4 tsp, garlic powder, 1/4 tsp. salt, 1/8 tsp. red pepper.

Mix all ingredients well. Roll in balls and press with fork. Place onto ungreased
cookie sheet. Cook in 350 degree oven 20 minutes or until light brown.

Gran's Olive Cheese Nuggets: Makes 2 to 2 1/2 dozen
Ingredients:
1/4 lb. sharp cheese, 1/4 cups soft butter or oleo, 3/4 cup sifted flour, 1/8 tsp.
salt, 1/2 tsp. paprika, 24 to 30 large stuffed olives

Grate cheese, mix with butter or oleo. Mix salt and paprika with sifted flour.
With a mixer, add flour mixture to butter cheese mixture, adding flour in two
additions. Make dough into balls and shape around the olives. Bake at 400 degrees
for 12-15 minutes. Serve hot or at room temperature.

Julie's Quiche Lorraine:
Ingredients: One pie crust, 6 slices rather thick bacon, cooked and drained, 12
thin slices of Swiss or Gruyere cheese (about the same size as the bacon), 4 eggs,
1 tablespoon flour, 1/4 tsp. nutmeg, 1/2 tsp. salt, Cayenne pepper, 2 cups light
cream (half and half), 1 1/2 tablespoons melted butter.

Line 9 inch pie plate with the pie crust. Cut bacon slices in half, cover the crust with overlapping layers of cheese and bacon. Beat together 4 eggs, 1 tablespoon flour, a generous grating of nutmeg, the salt, and a bit of cayenne. Add 2 cups of light cream, stir in 1 1/2 tablespoons melted butter. Strain this custard over cheese and bacon. Bake in moderate oven at 375 degrees for about 40 minutes or
until custard is set and top is browned. (May have to cover the edges of the crust if they start to brown too much, with some strips of foil). Cut into small wedges for hors d'oeuvres or 6 pieces for a main course.

SALADS:

Cherry-Coke Salad: Serves 6-8
Ingredients:
2 cans of cherries, (not maraschino), 1 large can crushed pineapple, 8 ounces
of Coca-Cola (not Diet), 1/2 cup chopped pecans, 1 pkg. cherry jello.

Heat cherries and cherry juice to boiling. Take off heat and add Jello and stir.
Add pineapple juice and crushed pineapple. Pour in Coca-Cola and nuts. When cool,
put in refrigerator to congeal.

Jay's Cucumber Salad: Serves 12
Ingredients:
1/2 onion, 2 cucumbers, 1/2 cup sour cream, 1 Tablespoon Red Wine Vinegar, 1 tsp.
chopped parsley, 1 clove garlic, crushed, 1 1/2 tsp. salt, 1 tsp. sugar, 1/2 tsp.
coarse ground pepper.

Peel, grind, and drain well, the onions and cucumbers. Mix with the rest of ingredients. Let ripen at least 6 hours. Serve with tossed mixed greens. (alternately, grate onions and cucumbers and drain well.)

Larry's Avocado Mousse:
Ingredients:
1 tablespoon gelatin dissolved in 2 tablespoons cold water, 1 pkg. Lemon Jello,
2 cups hot water, 1 cup mashed ripe avocado, 1/2 cup mayonnaise, 2 cups of
grapefruit cut into small pieces, 1 tablespoon grated onion juice, dash of salt.

Dissolve gelatin mixture and lemon jello in the hot water. When partially
congealed then stir in remaining ingredients. Rinse mold in cold water, pour
mixture in, and let it set in fridge until congealed. When ready, dip mold
quickly in warm water and turn out on crisp salad leaves. (Sometimes it is not
a bad idea to either lightly spray your mold with Pam, or lightly coat with a
little Mayo before filling it..Careful when dipping not to get the salad wet!)

VEGETABLES:

Stuffed Baked Tomatoes: Serves 6
Ingredients:
6 medium tomatoes, 3 tablespoons chopped onions, 1/4 cup chopped
celery, 2 tablespoons bacon or chicken fat, 1 tsp. salt, 1/4 tsp. pepper, 1/2
tsp. basil, 1 pkg. frozen baby Lima beans, 1/2 cup fine bread crumbs.

Remove pulp from tomatoes, but save the pulp. Do discard the juice and the seeds.
Cook onions and celery in fat until tender. Add cooked limas, tomato pulp, bread
crumbs, and seasonings. Bake in greased muffin pans at 350 degrees for 30 minutes.
Can stuff succotash inside tomatoes for variation (Lima beans and corn)

May's Okra Patties: Makes about 12 patties
Ingredients:
1 pkg. chopped okra, 1 finely chopped onion, salt and pepper to taste, cornmeal.

Boil okra as directed on pkg. Drain, add onions and enough meal to make it stick together. Spoon in skillet with just enough oil to fry. Fry like salmon croquettes.

Potato Casserole: Serves 8-10
Ingredients:
6 large potatoes, 2 cups sour cream, 1 cup milk, 2 cups grated cheese, 1 stick
butter, 2/3 cup onions, tops and all.

Boil potatoes in jackets. Chill until cold. Shred on grater. Melt butter in double boiler. Add cheese, small amount at a time. Mix together sour cream and milk. Add to cheese mixture. Add onions. Stir all together. Add to shredded potatoes. put in casserole and bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes. Save a small amount of cheese to sprinkle on top the last 5 minutes of baking.

MAINS:

Mary's Meat Casserole:
Ingredients:
One 5 oz. pkg. of egg noodles, 1 cup sour cream, 1 cups cottage cheese, 1 lb.
ground beef, 1 can tomato paste, 1 small chopped onion, salt and pepper to taste,
garlic salt to taste, dash of Accent! for flavor. Small amount hoop cheese for
top (hoop cheese is a mild cheddar/longhorn cheese.)

Cook egg noodles until done in salted water then drain. Add sour cream and cottage cheese. Cook beef in skillet with small amount of Wesson oil with onion until slightly brown. Add small can of tomato paste. Alternate layers in casserole dish, starting with noodles mixture and ending with the meat. Cook covered in 325 degree
oven for 30 to 40 minutes. Sprinkle grated hoop cheese over top and let melt.

June's Beef Stroganoff: Serves 4-6
Ingredients and Method together:
Select 3 lbs. of round steak (1/2 inch thick.) Remove skin and fat.*Tenderize with
a mallet and cut into 2 inch long strips, cutting ACROSS the grain. Heat in large
frying pan, 1/4 cup butter. Brown meat. Add one large onions (thinly sliced.)
Cook several minutes. Sprinkle 1/2 cups sifted flour over the top. Stir until
flour is well blended, (at least one full minutes to get rid of "flour taste"),
then add one can beef consomme, undiluted, and one tomato soup, undiluted.
Continue to cook, stirring until sauce is thickened. Add 1-3 oz. can mushrooms and
1 1/2 tsp. Accent! and salt and pepper to taste. Cover and cook over low heat one to
1 1/2 hours or until meat is tender. Just before serving, add 1/2 cup thick sour cream. (Best to add a little stroganoff sauce to your sour cream and stir, then
add the sour cream mixture to the skillet, to avoid "curdling")
Can sprinkle a little parsley on top, if desired. Serve over rice or noodles.
* I ALWAYS ask my butcher to tenderize the meat when I buy it...He probably hates
to see me coming...

Classic Cordon Bleu: Serves 5
Ingredients:
10 veal cutlets, 5 slices of boiled ham, 5 slices of American cheese,
1 egg, 2 tablespoons water, 2 tablespoons flour, 1/2 cup cracker crumbs, 1/2 cup
Wesson oil, salt and pepper, and horseradish mustard for side dipping.

Place 1 slice ham and 1 slice cheese in between two veal cutlets. Press edges on
all sides to enclose ham and cheese completely. Season cutlets with salt and
pepper, dip in flour, then in beaten egg mixed with 2 tablespoons of water, and
then in cracker crumbs. Place immediately in skillet with hot oil and cook until golden brown at medium heat. Serve with horseradish mustard.

Nicole's Refrigerator Rolls
Ingredients:
1 cup whole milk, 2 sticks butter, 1 cup sugar, 4 tsp. salt, 4 eggs (well-beaten),
2 pkgs. yeast, 1/2 cup lukewarm water, 6 cups flour.

Scald milk. Add butter, sugar, and salt and stir until dissolved. Pour into a
large bowl and cool. Add eggs and yeast (pre-dissolved in water). Mix flour,
(3 cups at a time) into mixture. Let rise in warm place until it doubles in bulk
(I always place a warm pan of water on the lower shelf of oven, and the dough
is placed on the top shelf). Punch down and refrigerate overnight. Roll on a
floured board. Cut with a biscuit cutter. Brush with melted butter, fold over,
and top with MORE BUTTER. (shameful! yum!)Let it rise again. Bake at 375 degrees
until browned.

Alternative recipe:
Mix 2 pkgs. of yeast in 1 cup of warm water for 5 minutes. Combine one cup of
boiling water, 2/3 cups sugar, 1 cup solid Crisco, and 1 1/2 tsp. salt. When cool, add 2 whole eggs (in your mixer if desired). Add yeast mixture and then 6 cups of
UNSIFTED flour and blend. Refrigerate for 24 hours or longer. Put on lightly
floured board and knead well. Roll out, cut in shapes and let rise until doubled
in size. Bake at 375 degrees until browned.

DESSERTS!!!

Daniel's Never Fail Divinity: (though I recommend that you skip this on a rainy
day)
Ingredients and Method together:
FIRST COOKING: Cook 3 cups of sugar, 1 cup clear Karo syrup, and 2/3 cup of water
until it spins like a thread. While this is cooking, beat 3 egg whites in a mixer
until they are stiff. Pour this first cooking into the stiff egg whites slowly. While you are pouring first cooking into egg whites, start your SECOND COOKING of
1 cup of sugar and 1/2 cup of water until it forms a hard ball. Add this to the first mixture until almost stiff. Add 1 tsp. of vanilla and 1 cup of chopped pecans. Drop on wax paper or foil, using two teaspoons. ( I think that I would use a candy thermometer for this recipe! There is NOTHING better than wonderful freshly made
Divinity...Tastes like a sweet cloud! Note to self..."taste like a sweet cloud"
could certainly be utilized in poem not written yet..Like that phrase...)

Orange Pound Cake:
Ingredients:
Cake: 1 box of Yellow cake mix (without pudding), 4 eggs, 2/3 cups Wesson Oil,
1 pkg. of orange jello, 3/4 cup orange juice (from frozen orange juice)
Sauce: 2/3 cup of orange juice and 3/4 cup sifted powdered sugar

Bake in a greased and floured tube pan at 325 degrees for 45 minutes. Let cool a
bit and turn out on a rack and while cooling more make the sauce. Cook juice and powdered sugar until dissolved and bubbling 3 to 5 minutes. while it is hot spoon
it over the cake.

Jeffrey's Bourbon Balls:
Ingredients:
2 1/2 cups crushed vanilla wafers, 1 cup pecans, 1 cup sifted powdered
sugar, 2 tablespoons cocoa, 3 tablespoons clear Karo syrup, and 1/4 cup Bourbon.
Grind vanilla wafers and pecans in food chopper (today it would be the wonderful
food processor), then mix it with the cocoa and sugar. Stir Karo into the Bourbon, and then pour it over the dry ingredients. Mix until all is moistened and shape
them into small balls. Roll them in additional sifted powdered sugar.

APERITIF:
Black Russians:
Mix equal parts of GOOD Vodka (i.e. Grey Goose, Chopin, Belvedere, etc) with
Kahlua

Suffice it to say that a SPLENDID TIME WAS HAD BY ALL!

Well, let's summarize..what have we experienced/learned here?

1. Parties are a lot of fun when they are "themed" and part of the fun has to
do with the guests being a part of the "making and planning" as well...

2. Children are not the only ones that like to play "dress up" (transvestites
like to as well...) OH, NICOLE...THAT IS SO VERY, VERY TACKY!
sorry...

3. Clothes today can be a bit boring comparatively

4. People of that era, did not know what cholesterol was, but even so, there
was obviously a more laid back approach to calories, fats, and carbs..
i.e. Amount of cheese, butter, cream, etc in these popular dishes...

5. Wesson oil was either the only oil around or people had a serious lack of
imagination when it came to the type of oil utilized in recipes!

6. I miss the "Granny Gown Dress", as a whole lot of caloric mistakes could be
hidden under them...Not that anyone really needed to do that at that age...

7. Love the music...What a great combination of talents represented at this bash!

8. People should give more parties!!!

Hope you enjoy this Retro Fantasy Dinner Party...

I look forward to the kinds of parties that you will throw!

FROZEN HEART

2009-04-21T00:35:00.002-05:00

i long for love
not just for me

for that little girl
inside, you see

who's waited for
a handsome prince

been disappointed
ever since

one day she figured
out the truth

the "pretty"ones
are usually doofs

"i can't believe
there's no one here,
that isn't married,
dead, or queer"

"this can't be IT!"
(now please be brave)

"my heart's not lying in some grave"

(remember, "DRAMA"
hurts your chances)

no wonder she's had
few romances

"why, I'm so charming
can't men tell?"

(they can but
so?)
hey, just as well....

you'd just get hurt
and cry and wail...

"this can't be love
it feels like HELL"

so in the end
you're lucky, see?

this way you'll suffer
differently...

alone, but not
without some friends
to tell you that shouldn't"t
spend
your precious time
desiring flings

go freshen up
put on some "bling"

yes, go dress up
and come around

we'll all go out and
"do the town"

your favorite place
with food and wine

you'll feel much better
in no time

a "wish" is healthy
desires, passion

though at your age,
it's "hardly" the fashion

frankly we don't really see
that dreaming of this fantasy
has done you any good at all?

the last one's name?
can't quite recall
i think she said his name was
PAUL

well...
that was SILLY from the start...

a MARRIED man?
"He froze my heart"

yes dear, you've told us
now let's see

how DOES one spell
STUPIDITY?

is it with one P
or with two?

no matter
as this poem
is through

nicole 4/20/09

WHY GOATS? WHY NOT? GOAT CHEESE LOVE IN THE MODERN WORLD

2009-04-16T23:01:00.011-05:00

There are events in my childhood that are embedded in my memory.

Why some memories are there and others are completely faded is a mystery.

Often what I DO remember is not particularly important, or it does not seem
to be..

When it comes to food though, my memories tend to be quite "sharp" as though
they were yesterday...(child "foodie" before there was such a thing...)

There is an entire vacation with my family that I have forgotten, but it seems
as though if food was involved, I remember...

When I was growing up, we lived next door to a Jewish family.
We'll call them "The Jacobs" for reasons of privacy..
They were a very interesting family.
Most of their family/relatives were either killed or barely escaped from Germany
during the *Holocaust..

*A fascination and obsession with the Holocaust and everything I could find to
read or see about it, started early in my life.."The Diary of Anne Frank" was read/seen so many times I cannot count...I am one of the few people that I know
who has been to the Holocaust Museum in Washington DC...Even my friends
who live there will not go..It is a sad, stark, and humbling experience which I
will never forget..
I made my son go as well...they don't really teach these unbelievably horrific
set of events in school..from what I can gather, they barely "touch" on it...

The "Jacobs" were also relatives (nephew/great nieces) of Albert Einstein's.

(This was WAY before Paul McCartney characterized an "Uncle Albert" in any song)

His personally signed photos were here and there around the house.

I didn't know who he was as a child.
I thought that he looked a little creepy.
Come to find out that a lot of geniuses do...
So do those with feeble minds
"Creepy" does not discriminate

Now I LIKE creepy looking geniuses...
I still don't care for creepy looking feeble minded individuals
But then again...that's just me...

I found the "Jacobs" to be intriguing and so different from my own family.
This extended not only to their observing different holidays and customs than
we did, but also to the "everyday" food that they ate.

Their house was the first place that I ever saw a bagel.
They were "Lenders" from a frozen bag...
We weren't in New York.
I thought that the frozen bagels were unsweetened doughnuts...
I couldn't imagine why anyone would be interested in them..

I grew up in a "white bread" mostly Christian middle class suburb in Dallas
in the late 50s'/60s..
"Leave it to Beaver" seemed fairly realistic,(except for the fact that our Mothers didn't wear high heels at home during the day...)

When I spent the night with my friend next door, we had a breakfast that I will
never forget, as it spawned my love for creamy spreadable cheeses to this day,
(as well as ANY food that is found at Jewish gatherings, delis, and the like..
Lox, cream cheese, sour cream in herring, and other Jewish cultural foods and I
are well acquainted and maintain a mutual love and respect.)

Next door the breakfast table was laden with a basket of warm toasted rye bread
and a crock of herb cream cheese...I was in heaven...It was so delicious...

Cream cheese has always been one of my favorites, even the "light" version!

It's also been a "No-No" though, because it IS high in fat and calories..(low
in carbs though, in case anyone wants to know...)

Therefore, I was relieved when in the early 80s', I began to see "Goat Cheese"
or "Chevre" on some of the restaurant menus where I dined.

It was "Love At First Bite"

At that time, the main way it was presented was usually on a plate with whole roasted garlic swimming in delicious extra virgin olive oil, crusty bread, and accompanied by some Greek Olives...
With a good bottle of wine, it was a dinner in itself...

Slowly I began to see Goat Cheese incorporated into more recipes, like tarts,
salads, souffles, pasta, gratins, etc.

In the beginning, one could only acquire goat cheese at places like Whole Foods,
but presently it can be found almost anywhere in local supermarkets...

That's a good thing, because I LOVE to cook with it.

There are SO MANY delicious recipes containing goat cheese, one of which I have previously posted at Foodbuzz, a tasty Goat Cheese Stuffed Chicken Breast with
Basil.

Just a good, easy, simple, and straight forward dish.
I've taken a liking to that kind of cookery these days...

This is a good place to insert my number one thought about good cooking/food....

"QUALITY INGREDIENTS YIELD QUALITY RESULTS"

I know that sounds obvious, yet many restaurants/cooks try to get away with using
lower quality ingredients, and you simply can't if you want extraordinary results...

I realize that food products are expensive these days, but I still believe that
if one shops carefully and omits the "junk" and processed or "quick" foods, that good quality ingredients can still be had...

Admittedly though, and unsettling, I see that "junk food" is cheap, and fresh veggies, fruits, and leans meats are ridiculously expensive..

What to do in these times?

Hope it gets better quickly, and still buy as much of the "good stuff" as you
can..(some of the leading economic advisers came out this week on CNN, to announce
that they think that our economic downfall will be over a lot quicker than they
had originally projected)

Cook more "simply" with less ingredients, but with an emphasis on quality.

Example..try not to buy an "exotic" spice that you are only going to use in one
recipe...OR..try to get only as much spice as you need for a dish (like you can
do at Whole Foods)

Get the Butcher to give you only what portion of meat is needed in an already packaged container, if you don't need the whole lot...
(They WILL do this, even if they are not thrilled by it...I mean, when is the
last time that you saw a butcher "thrilled" anyway?)

Another idea is to try to make the extra time and effort to cook more at home,
(not always possible, but let's face it...most of us waste a lot of time, I
know that I do..Planning ahead of time and having the ingredients needed on hand makes this one a lot easier..)

Off the "Soapbox" (though at times it just FEELS good, doesn't it?)

My Sister is a Teacher, so she gets to do that everyday.
She is VERY GOOD at it...
Practice makes perfect, as I always say...

In my profession, I can only "gently" speak to the smokers with lung disease,
and even THEN, I must be politely professional in my "lectures" to them.

I digress as usual...

I am the type of person that simply must do a little research about anything
that I really like..(though my research about men/relationships has done little
to enlighten me so far...i.e. see poems)

Still, my research goes on, and today it is a little about Goats, and even more
about Goat Cheese.

The reason that I started my research on Goats, instead of just goat cheese, was because of the Goat's picture shown above...

Now take a close look at that...

What's wrong with that picture?
Goats reside in pastures, in rolling hills.......

With "Heidi's" Grandfather in the ALPS!

AND BESIDES...I RECOGNIZE WHERE THIS GOAT IS!!!

WHO KNEW THAT GOATS TOOK LEISURE VACATIONS, "TAKING IN THE SIGHTS" AND DOING A
LITTLE SHOPPING IN THE SOHO AREA OF NEW YORK?

WHAT...THEY GET A LITTLE STRESSED PUMPING OUT THE MILK, WANDERING ON THE SLOPES
OF GRASS?

GOATS THESE DAYS REQUIRE A LITTLE "R AND R"?

HEY I'M NOT MAKING THIS STUFF UP...PICTURES DON'T LIE...TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT THIS..

I'M JUST THINKIN THAT THE POPULARITY OF THE "CHEESE" HAS GONE TO THEIR HEADS
A LITTLE...THAT'S ALL...

Wisegeek.com filled me in on the following info, (though no mention of travel)

"In the rugged, rocky Mediterranean landscape goats do rather well. They can climb and find food in places where cows would not be able to get to. The landscape used to be rather void of vegetation in many areas because goats would eat everything in sight. Now it seems that those areas are much greener. Does it mean that there are fewer goats?"

No, it means that they're taking vacations and eating at touristy vegetarian restaurants, instead of the landscape...They're bored...They take advantage of
specials on Travelocity and the like...They've gotten "SOPHISTICATED"...

Back to the research...

"All goat breeds share the traits of being very hardy, curious, and intelligent, and they can be very interesting animals to have around, whatever one's use for them might be."

For what?..A shopping companion?
Personally I like to shop alone...

Now onto a bit about ultra delicious and pretty "good for you" Goat Cheese

What is goat cheese? Let's ask "Wisegeek"...

"Goat cheese has been made for thousands of years, and was probably one of the earliest made dairy products. In the most simple form, goat cheese is made by warming goat milk, mixing it with rennet to curdle, and then draining and pressing the curds. Soft goat cheeses are made in kitchens all over the world, with cooks hanging bundles of cheesecloth filled with curds up in the warm kitchen for several days to drain and cure. If the cheese is to be aged, it is often brined so that it will form a rind, and then stored in a cool cheese cave for several months to cure.
Goat cheese is less calorie dense then cheeses made from milk from cows or sheep. Fats in goat's milk and cheese are easier to process in the digestive system, therefore some individuals who can not have other milk products, might be able to have goat's milk and cheese.
It also seems that the cheese from goat milk does not put strain on the heart, as some other cheeses do specifically because of it's lower fat content, and easy digestibility."

Now if that's not good news, I don't know what is! The next time you indulge in something with Goat Cheese, you can say with great confidence...

"I'm trying to eat a bit more LOW FAT...This is VERY Mediterranean, the way we
were MEANT to eat. Please pass more of the Wine, Goat Cheese, and Bread..."

I have always been the one who is "selected" to choose the restaurant, menu, etc. when there is a gathering, because most of my friends/coworkers know that I
know something, (or I think I do), about food, restaurants...

No exception to that rule back in the mid-nineties, for a Holiday Party at a restaurant for the Management team where I worked and was a part of.

I had a budget and a restaurant picked out, and the menu was pre-arranged and
worked out between myself and the "Food Director" at the restaurant...

It was a delicious dinner, if I say so myself. (What a surprise!)

Our first course was a delicious Bruschetta with Goat Cheese, Sun-dried Tomatoes,
and Basil that was sprinkled with a Balsamic Vinaigrette...really yummy...
It was a big hit...
To this day, I love "Toast" or "Croutons" with a Goat Cheese Topping.

I came upon this recipe a few years later...
I am positive that this is the recipe that the restaurant used...

This recipe hails from the wonderful "Mustards Grill" in Napa Valley.

It is a restaurant that has passed the test of time, and is still quite popular
today.

The "Goat Cheese Toast" was around when the Grill first opened...

It is a wonderful "Showcase" for a good Goat Cheese...

This is one of those recipes that I highly recommend that you try...(it is
especially great for parties...and as I always ask...Does anyone give parties
anymore? My friends "meet" for dinner at restaurants...Well, even if you don't
make this for a "party", try it for a light and delicious lunch/dinner)

First for the "CROUTONS"

THE BREAD-(use an oval crusty Sourdough Loaf, or any good quality French or Italian
baguette, just make sure that it is "good" bread. Even "day-old" good bread will
make good croutons.)

1 French Baguette or Italian Loaf of Bread
2 Tablespoons Olive Oil

Cut the baguette or Italian loaf on the bias into 1/4 inch slices, brush with the olive oil and toast on a baking sheet in a 325 degree oven or under a broiler until golden brown. Don't try to rush this: croutons need to be cooked slowly as they are crisp all the way through.
Often for soup, they are cut or torn into small pieces, mixed with oil, salt, and pepper, and baked until crisp.
For purposes of the Goat Cheese Bread recipe, you will keep the slices whole.

Mustards Grill's Goat Cheese Toast
Serves 6-12

8 ounces fresh goat cheese (Laura Chenel's Chevre Chabis, if you can get it...If
not, then the best quality that you can find/afford)
8 Tablespoons heavy cream or Creme Fraiche*
2 minced shallots
1 Tablespoon Dijon mustard
2 Tablespoons dry sherry vinegar or balsamic vinegar
Pinch of Salt
6 Tablespoons light olive oil
12 "Croutons"
1 Tablespoon cracked black peppercorns
6 sun-dried tomatoes, cut into lengthwise pieces
6 Tablespoon chiffonade of Basil
(chiffonade is taking all your basil leaves and stacking them on top of each other...roll the "package" up tightly; it should look like a hand rolled cigarette, then cut it crosswise with a sharp knife, into thin slices ...you will then have "chiffonade"..)

(trying to be "user-friendly")

In a mixing bowl, mix the goat cheese and cream or creme fraiche together with a wooden spoon until it reaches a spreading consistency. Do not chill. To make the vinaigrette, combine the shallots, mustard, vinegar, and salt in another bowl. Gradually whisk in the oil, and continue whisking until emulsified.

Spread the croutons with the goat cheese mixture. Return the croutons to the broiler and broil just until the cheese is warm. (WATCH IT EVERY SECOND)

Place the croutons on a serving plate. Drizzle a little bit of vinaigrette over the cheese, sprinkle with cracked peppercorns, and top with pieces of sun-dried tomato and a little bit of "chiffonade" of basil....
You only need a bit of vinaigrette per toast...
Any leftover is great with a mixed green salad.

*Creme Fraiche

This is so easy to make at home. Refrigerated, it will keep about a week to ten
days. Swirl a little into this or that; or whip it and add a dollop to a soup or
stew. Sweeten it and use it like whipped cream. Tex Mex enchiladas are often
topped with creme fraiche instead of sour cream. Virtually endless ways in which
to use it..

Makes 1 1/4 cup

1/4 cup buttermilk
1 cup cream

Thoroughly mix the cream and buttermilk and let it sit at room temperature,
loosely covered, for 8 to 12 hours until thick.
Keep refrigerated after that.

IT TAKES A LOT TO EXCITE A GIRL LIKE ME!!!!!!

2009-04-15T23:04:00.003-05:00

I'm so excited...and I just can't hide it...I know, I know, I know, I know, I know
I LIKE IT!!!

I am SO excited that I am going to publish my very favorite homemade CHILI RECIPE!!
That's HOW very EXCITED that I AM!
I am EVEN going to GIVE YOU MY SECRET INGREDIENT!!!

Do you have any idea
WHAT HAS:

Put the FIRECRACKERS in my step?
The PEPPER in my PEP?

The ZIP in my zeal?
Me SPINNING on one heel?

The SPITTING of my words? (I'm trying not to face anyone directly...)
The ACTING like a NERD?

The RHYMING like a clown?
The UP instead of down?

GUESSES?

#1.FINALLY...THE "MAN OF MY DREAMS" OR EVEN THE ONE I JUST WROTE A POEM ABOUT?

GOODNESS NO!

(Let's be realistic my friend..or did the Tooth Fairy visit you this year?)

#2.SOMEONE HAS OFFERED TO PAY FOR MY BOOB JOB AND EYE LIFT?

BINGO!..and then they're taking me to Paris for dinner..yeah..

#3.THE AMERICAN LITERARY SOCIETY IS INTERESTED IN PUBLISHING MY POEMS?

Sure..right after they publish the memoirs of Paris Hilton

NO MORE GUESSES....

After 6 long wretched, ravaged, wronged, ridiculous, and redundant? months, I have found A,

drum roll paleese...

FULL TIME JOB!!!!!

Yeah, that's right...the kind with, you guessed...BENEFITS!!!!

And just when you thought it was almost too good to be true...
THERE'S MORE...
That's right...If you order in the next 2 minutes,

Wait a minute..

HEY...where is this going?
I was telling all of you about my job...
How do I get into these jams anyway?
Far too ambitious..I HAVE tried to settle down but...

Back to my new and hopefully improved way of living...

I am working in a hospital that is only 150 beds, so if I get lost, it will not be
for long...

It is a Neurological and Surgical Center with an amazing reputation, therefore a
"feather in my cap" (not that I wear one..)

There is no Emergency Room..(Oh this really IS too good, isn't it?)

It's night shift with a mostly MALE STAFF (this is looking better all the time..)

AND...because it is a part of a huge Governmental Medical Center...

I AM WORKING FOR THE STATE AND THEY ARE PAYING FOR MY INSURANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!

There are other "goodies", but that one killed me...

Someone is going to pay for my medical insurance?

Pinch me....Wake me up....

If I wake up and find out that this is yet another one of my long and laborious dreams,
I am going to be "most upset"...(see how I CAN control what I say sometimes?...I
usually just don't want to...)

Damned thing is...I was SURE it was going to be a waste of time to interview...

The boss is someone that I worked for many years ago...

I was almost POSITIVE that she did not like me...

I was wrong..(Did I ever tell you that being wrong is not always a bad thing?)

She literally greeted me with open arms..
(did she just forget perhaps? We used to have..ummmm...."intelligent debates" about clinical differences and policies)

I never thought that it would take me this long
I am happy that for now, this search is over...

Now for my favorite Sirloin Chili...

Am I from Texas and does the chili contain BEANS?

Of Course...and whoever made up the "rule" of
"there ain't no beans in chili from Texas",
obviously resided elsewhere,
cause in Texas...
"We do what the hell we want, and MY chili has not one but TWO kinds of BEANS!"

SULTRY SIRLOIN CHILI
(wow...what a name! I'm lovin it!)
Serves 6

2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1/2 cup flour
Salt and Pepper (to season sirloin)
2 pounds sirloin, bite size chunks
2 large onions, chopped
1 green bell pepper, seeded and chopped
1 red bell papper, seeded and chopped
2 jalapenos, seeded and chopped (unless you want heat, then don't seed them)
3 cloves garlic, chopped
3 tablespoons chili powder
2 tablespoons cumin
2 teaspoons oregano
12-ounce bottle of ale
2 cups low sodium beef stock
4 cups crushed tomatoes
2 cups canned black beans, drained and rinsed
2 cups canned kidney beans, drained and rinsed
1/2 to 1 ounce milk chocolate with or without almonds, chopped (to taste)
Garnish: Shredded cheddar, red onion, scallions, cilantro, sour cream, lime wedges

Heat oil in large heavy pot over medium high heat.
In a pie plate combine salt, pepper, and flour with a fork.
Toss sirloin cubes with flour to coat.
Shake off excess flour.
Brown sirloin in pot on all sides and remove meat to a plate.
If necessary, add more oil to pan and add onions.
Cook onions over medium heat until they begin to soften.
Stir in green, red, and jalapeno peppers and cook for 3-5 minutes.
Add chili powder, cumin, and oregano.
Return browned meat to pan and pour in beef and beef stock.
Bring to a a boil and cover and reduce heat to a simmer.
Cook for one hour or until meat is tender.
Add crushed tomatoes and cook for 30-45 minutes.
Stir in black and kidney beans and chocolate, and gently simmer for 15 minutes.
Serve topped with the garnishes of your choice.

I like to serve this with cornbread and a crisp green salad, but sometimes...
We just break open the saltines, pour up a bowl of red, pop a beer, and say
"WOW...DONCHA JUST LOVE CHILI?"

(Actually a nice glass of Cabernet is my favorite accompaniment, but the other
idea sounded so much better, and is probably what most people do!)

Later...Nicole

"NOT THROUGH" (A POEM OF TRUTH AND SHAME)

2009-04-14T23:54:00.007-05:00

"NOT THROUGH"

i know that you're out there
reduced now to lurking
you could have been here
with a love that was working

decisions are difficult
morally driven
but you've only one lifetime
to enjoy what i've given
to you and you only
though carelessly tossed
away like the garbage
a treasure you've lost

if you are still listening
to what i have said
just give me some sign
so i'll know you're not dead

and i don't mean "dead"
as in "perished", for good
i would be more careful
with words, if i could

it's not smart to write
about you,
don't you know?
i'll answer no questions
from friends or from foes

the last words
he said to her
"My Heart Is Yours"
has left her
with feelings
reminiscent of whores

your thoughts were seductive
your words filled my heart
you made me feel lovely
and desirably smart

"you ought to know better"
the critics agree
who listens to critics?
about films...
but not ME

can't you find a way
to still let me know
or were promises made
that won't let you go?

i cannot give up
what was almost mine
give me an option
show me a sign

begging is pitiful
won't do for me
but turning away
is too final, you see

i rarely have feelings
so utterly strange
so wrong, so forbidden,
unlikely to change

not easy to leave me
and yet all the while
you've made your decision
to live in denial

once there were two people
their love fraught with pain
pursuing a dream
of together
in vain

nicole 4/14/09

RENAISSANCE WOMAN POSTS A POEM AND A PIE

2009-04-13T23:30:00.004-05:00

I worked with a guy this weekend, that is a former co-worker and friend
He didn't know that I wrote poetry or was interested in cooking/recipes...
He said "Wow, I guess that you're a "Renaissance Woman", aren't you?"
I thought...Yeah..I suppose so...
Hence the title to this blog

No matter how long you work with people in unfortunate circumstances, once in
awhile you come upon a patient that "stays" with you after you come home..
Keeping your "distance" is an important part of the health field
I have always felt that others were better at this than I am...

NOWHERE
(for Kerin)

They say she was "Something"
Good looking
Lots of friends

HORROR like this
is surely no way to end

Strong winds threw you wildly
down the stairs one day

and life as you knew it
was taken away

Now you open your eyes
but you no longer see

And silent screams cry
"What has happened to me?"

I know you don't speak
but it's clear in your face

that you're desperately living
in a far away place

A pocket of space
that won't let you break free

Where death has escaped you
and life's a memory

You might just remember
a few things from your past

When I called you "Cat Woman"
you responded at last

It's not like you spoke to me
I'm told it's not new

Though I saw just a glimpse of your smile
It's true!

There's not much that's left of you
Tragic, unfair

Too young to leave us
Hearts sink in dispair

Can't leave you there frightened
I must take you home

Spilling all of my feelings
on this unsuspecting poem

Strong winds picked her up
and threw her down stairs

Then took her to live
In the land of NOWHERE

Nicole 4/14/09

PIE, OH MY...HOW I LOVE PIE...

A recipe so simple, you won't believe how delicious it is...
Takes no time to make, just has to be planned...
This pie needs to chill for at least 8 hours
More is better...overnight is perfect, but not required
Think "Simple is Good", and you will "Get it"

LIMEADE PIE

1 can sweetened condensed milk (Eagle Brand)
1 small can of frozen limeade (defrosted)

Mix those two together until well blended

FOLD in:
One carton (15 oz to 18 oz) size of "Cool Whip"(defrosted)
The word "fold" is important here, and YES I said Cool Whip...

Spoon filling into a premade graham cracker crust ( I like Keebler best)
If you must make your own that would be perfectly acceptable (just don't come
crying to me when you miss your much needed "quickie" nap..)

Use your microplane if you have one, but if not finely grate some lime peel all
over the top of the pie..(then ask yourself why you don't have a microplane, as they are not expensive and the best tool created in YEARS!)

Not only is this recipe step attractive, it very much adds to the lime "punch" of the pie...

Put in fridge for at least 8 hours..

This pie literally took me about 5 minutes to make and is sensational!

Little trick I picked up from Food TV, concerning the cutting of the first
piece...
IF you do use the premade crust that is in foil.. cut the pie piece, then
actually cut the foil with scissors where the first cut piece is( top to bottom on the side of the pie...two cuts....)
Love that trick...

Hope you understand, if you don't, then just cut the first piece as you always have, and who cares if it is not the most attractive?
When a pie is THIS good it matters little...

Spicy Scallops with Chile Mayonnaise

2009-04-09T18:42:00.007-05:00

I'll bet about this time, you thought that I would NEVER post another recipe...
Does this "poetry world" have her bound,tied,and mesmerized to the point
where she has forgotten about food/recipes/cooking/dining?
NEVER!!!!!

To prove it, I will post a most delectable recipe that makes me drool just
to think about it..
This is a recipe from one of my favorite restaurants, as some of you know,
"Fog City Diner" in San Francisco.
One of Cindy Pawlcyn's visiting chefs, Pat Coll, developed this delicious
recipe.

I DO love scallops, don't you? The picture I posted is of deep fried scallops
with tartar sauce, which is very tasty...though somewhat "common"...

Seems like where I live, I end up eating them mostly in a pasta dish.

This recipe is hardly "common" and gives one an even BETTER way to enjoy
them...

Serves 8 for "small plate" or appetizer portions
Obviously less for a main dish course

Large sea scallops are recommended for this dish, as they have better flavor,
and you can get them crispy on the outside without drying them out.

Scallops are coated with a spicy breading, deep-fried, and served on a bed of lightly dressed cabbage...

Since the cooking time is short, have the salad ready before you start frying.

If you prefer, you can sear the scallops in a lightly oiled nonstick pan instead
of deep frying them.

SCALLOPS:
1 1/4 pounds sea scallops, large

BREADING:
1/2 cup flour
1/2 cup cornmeal
1 1/2 teaspoons paprika
1/4 teaspoons cayenne powder
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cumin
1 1/2 teaspoons kosher or sea salt
1 1/2 teaspoons freshly ground white pepper
1 1/2 tablespoons pure chile powder

SALAD:
6 tablespoons olive oil
2 tablespoons rice vinegar
Kosher or sea salt to taste
Freshly ground pepper to taste
1/2 head red cabbage, thinly shredded
1/2 bunch scallions, cut on the bias
1/2 bunch cilantro, leaves only

CHILE MAYONNAISE:
3/4 cup mayonnaise
3 1/2 tablespoons Chile Paste (recipe follows)
Juice of one lemon
About 2 tablespoons cold water

Peanut oil for deep-frying
2 lemons, cut into wedges

Remove the connecting muscles from the sides of the scallops and check the scallops for shell fragments.
Combine the breading ingredients in a bowl, mix well, and pass it through a
sieve.
Dust the scallops with a light even coating, and shake off any excess.

Combine the oil, vinegar, salt, and pepper to make a vinaigrette.
Toss the cabbage, scallion, and cilantro together in a bowl and dress lightly
with the vinaigrette.

To make the chili mayonnaise, combine the mayonnaise, Chili Paste, and lemon
juice and mix well.
Add water using only as much as necessary to get a sauce that is relatively
thick, yet thin enough to be drizzled.

Deep-fry the scallops for approximately one minute, or pan-fry them to medium-rare in a lightly oiled non-stick skillet.
To serve, place the dressed cabbage on small plates, and top with the scallions.
Drizzle with Chile Mayonnaise, and garnish with a wedge of lemon.

CHILE PASTE:
Yields 1/2 cup
You can vary the chiles in this recipe depending on preference and what you can
find in your area.
ANYTHING can be ordered online these days as well (including chiles of all kinds)
This is the combination used at Fog City Diner...

2 dried ancho or cascabel chiles
2 dried pasilla negro chiles
2 dried guajillo chiles

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Stem and seed the chiles. (WEAR GLOVES)
Place them on a cookie sheet or roasting pan, and toast 5-8 minutes, until the
aroma of the chiles develops.
Put the chiles in a medium-sized bowl, add hot water to cover, and soak until
soft.
Drain off all but 1/2 cup of water.
Blend the chile and 1/4 to 1/2 cup of the reserved water in a blender until
smooth, then rub through a sieve.
Store in the refrigerator.

Two Days After

2009-04-09T18:31:00.004-05:00

she's hovering under
a full gray moon
now that he has gone
and wakes up from her weary flight
in hopes to hear his song

the sleep must clear both eyes a bit
for her to realize
that love has passed her up again
though tempted her with lies

she asks herself
"how could you let this love tear up your heart?
you knew full well its limitations
from the very start"

there is no answer to suffice
no reasoning that's clear
love happens whether right or wrong
it's light so strong, so dear

and now she's left alone again
with thoughts of what is past
though hope still clings
to feathered wings
that love finds her
at last

Nicole

Poem for a Muse

2009-04-07T21:37:00.004-05:00

they were together
without a care
just floating downstream
in the midst of nowhere

time was illusional
nowhere to be
locked in embrace
bodies floating at sea

not a word was spoken
and the sounds of the night
seranaded the lovers
under rays of moonlight

stroking her hair
and whispering her name
he kissed her sweet lips
she returned just the same

and all through the night
swaying gently at sea
the lovers were right
where they wanted to be

is this but a dream?
she heard him say
for he dreaded that she
might leave him someday

though she wanted to give him
all of her heart
he knew that she couldn't
right from the start

memories are comforting
when it all goes away
but the feelings still linger
from the place where they lay

Nicole

HOW TO SURVIVE NIGHTSHIFT AND THE ULTIMATE COMFORT FOOD RECIPE FOR POTATO GOAT CHEESE CASSEROLE BY STEPHEN PYLES

2009-04-06T19:30:00.008-05:00

Well of course, I am no EXPERT, but I must say that after my first weekend of
three 12 hour night shifts in a row, I can join right in there with the best of
em...
There was a distinct difference between most of the night shift employees and myself...
I actually SLEPT at least 6-8 hours before I came to work, and the
majority of people did not...

By the time the shift was about 3/4 into it, they were literal "zombies", hence giving me even more to worry about while driving on the road in the morning...

Look out for these folks...Their stories of "waking up" in the middle of driving their cars on the other side of the road, or in a ditch, did NOT comfort me...

The picture that I displayed with the girl holding the entire coffee pot to her mouth is extreme, yes, but not too terribly far from the truth...
Add to that several "Fuse" low carb drinks, and a low carb "Monster Energy Drink", at least one or two cups of coffee, a brought from home simple lunch, and having slept a decent amount of time before your shift, and you have the "secret" of survivingthe night shifts...

This is a good thing to know, because I found the night shift to be a lot more pleasant to work, more fun, and it pays a great deal more...All good things...
I will continue this as long as they will have me...Every weekend, 3- 12 hours
in a row...
(Hey if that doesn't spice up my social life, I simply don't know WHAT WILL!)

There is really only one of my closest friends that I will have a hard time
seeing, but he and I will work something out...we will have to...as I cannot
do without him for long..he is my ROCK* and my biggest fan...

*David, you are a wonderful friend and I love you...

Michael, you are also a wonderful friend and I love you, but it's hard to see
you with DC a bit far away

The other David...Well of course I love you too, and we must have lunch soon,
before we forget what each other looks like!!!

Mr Mystery Chef...You know where you stand...

I digress...
Most of the others that I see I can see during the week...My son works weekends,
so it is perfect as far as seeing him...

I will say that the true downside, is that here it is Monday night, after I have slept a few hours, and I am totally worthless and unable to "snap to"....

I feel sure that I will brighten up tomorrow...

Do forgive me if any of this post is illogical or careless in any way, as I
almost feel as though I am writing it in a perpetual fog and I cannot seem to
turn on my "fog lights"...(and that's different from usual why?)

I just got through thinking that this is where I really wanted to work, when
I got home today and received a phone call from a large hospital with an offer
for a full time position..Will call tomorrow to find out what it is...
When it rains it pours...

Onto a scrumptious recipe by one of my favorite Southwestern Chefs...
I have three favorite SW Chefs...
Stephen Pyles, Bobby Flay, and my 3rd favorite that will go nameless, but he
reads this blog and he knows who he is....
(such a woman of mystery at times..Sorry, I NEVER tell ALL! See, there are
PRIVATE things in my life that I don't share...Surprised ya, didn't I?)

One of them is Stephen Pyles, a pioneer in southwestern cuisine and owner of
fabulous restaurants over the years...This recipe comes from his very expensive
one in the 80s'-90s'..

It was in a beautifully quaint Victorian looking home...It was called "Routh Street"...

Across the street was another of his restaurants.. Sleek, modern to the max
(the retro white and chrome look), and a bit more affordable, though not inexpensive, called "Baby Rouths"...

I have previously posted a wonderful recipe from "Baby Routh's"on Foodbuzz
for "Honey Cornflake Chicken with Cilantro Cream"...It is wonderful...

I have fond memories of "Baby Routh's"

I had TWO surprise Birthday parties there for my 40th birthday...
One was put on by my workplace, and the other by the man that I was married
to at the time...
They are both, for the most part, wonderful memories...
The "work" one was great..

I remember that my office that day was filled to every inch with Black
balloons,and all over the hospital here and there, were MORE black balloons
as well as BANNERS! with my name and AGE on them..
Big and important Medical Center..they'd never let em get away with that
today...
These balloons and banners were all over the parking lot across the street
as well!
Craziness....

They then blindfolded me and took me to Baby Rouths for lunch, because it
was my favorite...All the other 8 managers were there, including my beloved
Boss, who is still a friend of mine to this day...
SO SPECIAL!!!He NEVER went to lunch!
(Gary...you're the best..Having you show up was a very big deal..)

The food was amazing, a beautiful "40th" Birthday cake was brought out after the meal...
The other surprise party, I will never forget, started with my then Husband
and I going to dinner there for my birthday, just the two of us, supposedly...

When we arrived, there was a dozen yellow roses on the table, my favorites at the time, (now they're Tulips in case anyone wants to send me flowers...don't all of
you call 1-800-FLOWERS at once, it'll tie up the line..)

Attached to the roses was a sweet and romantic card,(yeah he did some things right...), and turning around to look at the bar, I saw some of my friends there, all laden with presents...(which IS THE WAY that they always look best!!!)..
It was a wonderful surprise...We took up the 2nd floor of the restaurant..that
got a little wild towards the end...(yeah he did some things wrong as well...)

About now you must be thinking...ONLY SHE COULD TALK ABOUT HER NEW FOUND NIGHT
SHIFT JOB AND A COUPLE OF RESTAURANTS, AND TURN IT INTO A BLOG THAT YOU HAVE TO
TAKE A DAY OFF WORK TO BE ABLE TO FINISH...WHAT'S WITH THIS WOMAN?..

(Hint..that is why it is MY blog..)
I can rattle on however much I want to and you then have the choice to read
it or not..
It is a complete democracy in that way!!!
Yes I have a lot of stories to tell...
When YOU live this long, so will you!!!
I sound decrepid at times..So very exaggerate of me..

HEY WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE FOLLOWERS IN THE BOX...HELLO?

Rico, who IS a follower, is always commenting that he feels like he just read
an entire newspaper before it's all through...
(Rico...only teasing...keep the comments coming...you KNOW I like them...You have the best comments of all!)

Here's something that you SHOULD be thinking..
"It's a wonder that she can REMEMBER her 40th Birthday after ALL OF THIS TIME!!!"

(Don't make me have to mention my amazing memory again...embarrassing...by the
way...What did you say your name is? I KNOW YOU HAVE TOLD ME 4 TIMES...Seriously,
do not ask me to repeat your name...Anything else, and I'm a whiz, but no names please)

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING DIFFERENT.....

RECIPES FROM ROUTH STREET BY STEPHEN PYLES..

"POTATO GOAT CHEESE CASSEROLE" FOLLOWED BY...

"ROUTH STREET VINAIGRETTE" (USED IN THE RECIPE, AND GOOD ON EVERYTHING, EXCEPT PERHAPS CHOCOLATE...)

Potato Goat Cheese Casserole
Serves 6
2 baking potatoes, peeled and cut into 1/4 inch slices
2 slices bacon
Salt to taste
Routh Street Vinaigrette (1/4 cup)
3 tablespoons chopped chives
1 1/4 pound of Fresh Goat Cheese (at room temp)
Note...Great if you can get fresh, if not just the best quality you can find..
2 tablespoon heavy cream
4 eggs

Preheat oven to 400 degrees
In saucepan, boil potatoes about 3-5 minutes until just tender when pierced with
a knife.
In a skillet saute' bacon over low heat until crisp, and drain well..
Discard the rendered fat.
Dice bacon and lightly oil a 9x9 inch ovenproof casserole.
Layer bottom of casserole with potatoes, arranging so that they slightly overlap
and sprinkle with bacon and 1 tablespoons of chive.
In food processor, combine cheese, cream, and eggs, turning machine off and on quickly.
Mix until JUST combined (don't over mix!)
Spread mixture over the potatoes.
Bake 15 minutes or until light brown and firm in center.
Sprinkle remaining chives on top.
Serve and listen for the "ooos and ahhhhs"

Routh St. Vinaigrette
(all purpose for salads or recipes calling for flavorful vinaigrettes)

2 1/2 tablespoons balsamic vinegar (someday we will talk about balsamic...in
the meantime, there is no reason to spend a fortune on it in this recipe)
2 1/2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
1 cup olive oil
1 cup vegetable oil
1 teaspoon EACH...
minced cilantro, thyme, and basil
1/2 teaspoon EACH...
minced sage, ground cumin, and salt
2 teaspoons honey mustard
1 1/2 tablespoon pureed roasted garlic**
Fresh ground pepper to taste
**Yes you should have roasted garlic hangin around!
It is SO easy to always have this around..
Just roast some garlic heads when you are at home doing something else..
Squeeze the roasted garlic out, put it in a covered container and it will
keep for at least a few days and it's a great addition to a lot of things..
And again, garlic will BOOST your social life amazingly!!!
No one will stand near you, but hey...they understand your need for "space"

METHOD...
In mixing bowl, combine vinegars and drizzle in oils while whisking .
Whisk in remaining ingredients
Alternatively, the procedure may be followed using a food processor or blender..
Fresh ground pepper to taste

"UNSPOKEN"

2009-04-03T01:32:00.005-05:00

She has grown weary of the vast emptiness
As wishes and dreams produce less and less

She's on a stretch of highway without a car in sight
Just hoping for a ride to get her through the night

The silence is deafening as her thoughts shout out
And years of longing have caused her serious doubt

She's waited for one who will reach for her hand
Holding it tightly like no one else can

Into how many pieces can a heart be shattered
Yet still manage to thrive
and believe in things that matter?...

Poem by Nicole

"EVEN COWGIRLS GET THE SHAFT" AND A RECIPE FROM "COWGIRL BAR AND GRILL".

2009-04-01T18:08:00.007-05:00

When I was a young girl, I went through my childhood "phase" of wanting to be a
Cowgirl and have a Horse.

I grew up in a city, but most of the friends that I had, owned a horse..
They were kept at stables, and ultimately their parents ended up having to pay
for them to be taken care of on a daily basis, or the parents had to go with
the kid after school every day to feed/ride/take care of the horse...

I loved to go to their houses, as sometimes they actually had the horse at home..
We would ride in nearby empty lots, woods, and even on the sidewalks next to the streets!
Other times we would be dropped off at the stables, and ride to our hearts content.

Do you remember the old saying, that you should make a wish every time you go
under a bridge? I actually got to the point of LOOKING for bridges, so that I could pass under, all the while "wishing" for a horse...

My Mother made it very clear that her interest in getting me a horse and going to
a stable every day after school was NOT GOING TO HAPPEN IN THIS LIFETIME OR THE NEXT..(Now that I am older I can SO understand this...Whew..I thought that baseball
practice was trying...Imagine having to sloth through mud every afternoon with your
kids at a stable an hour away?)

When I was ten years old, my Grandfather, who had a big farm with all kinds
of animals, got me a Pinto Pony, to be kept at the farm.
We went to the farm, growing up, almost every weekend on Sundays, or sometimes we would spend the weekend. The pony would be kept there, and I could ride it when
we came out on weekends..Perfect plan! It was around when the summer holiday began.

In the summer we went out there even more, and sometimes stayed a few days..
It wasn't exactly "roughing it"..There was a pool, a player piano, a cook
named "Cindy" that would make us anything we wanted, (we always asked her to
make things that my Mother would not allow us to eat, like Cherry Cobbler..),
and other things to keep our attention, as well as being able to spend time with
both our Aunt and our Grandfather...

I was more than thrilled!

The pony had not really been trained though, and was a bit on the "wild" side..

I named him "Pinto"

(I had such an amazing imagination as a child, didn't I? REALLY...naming a Pinto Pony,"Pinto"...It literally brings tears to my eyes..)

Unfortunately about that exact time, I came down with an illness, that put me in
bed for three whole months, the ENTIRE summer...

Time to break out the kleenex..

I was unable to visit the farm, my "Pinto", or do literally ANYTHING...

As I recall, getting up to pee or going for a Doctor's visit was the highlight
of my life at that time...

(Need more kleenex? Toilet paper actually makes a fine substitute...)

By the time I was able to visit "Pinto", he was so wild that he only knew how to
throw people off his back..
Needless to say, Pinto was sold, and that, in short, was my only experience having my own horse...

Oh well, I suppose sadder things have happened...Hmm..let me think...

Actually nothing comes to mind at the moment, except for possibly a Shirley
Temple movie where "Rich little Shirley" is mistaken for a poor girl and kept from
her ailing Father, and has to scrub floors, and is made fun of by the rich snotty
girls...
"Poor Little Rich Girl"...Great film..now THAT I suppose is sadder..Sorta...

Out of all of these memories of my short lived days as a "Cowgirl with a Pony",
I am inspired to post a "Cowgirl Recipe".

This one comes straight from the popular Santa Fe, New Mexico restaurant,
"COWGIRL BBQ RESTAURANT AND GRILL", or sometimes called "COWBOY BAR AND GRILL"

One of their biggest sellers is their "Frito Pie", which they call,

"COWGIRL SMOKED BRISKET CHILI FRITO PIE"

I see this as a great dish for a casual get together..
The restaurant cuts off the top of individual sized Frito bags, puts them on a
plate, slitting the bags across down the middle, and then tops them with chips
then chili...

The Garnishes can then be added which include, Grated Monterey Jack Cheese or
Yellow Cheddar, Sour Cream, Sliced Pickled Jalapenos, Chopped Green Onions, Chopped Parsley, Chopped Cilantro, and Salsa..(maybe some Sliced Black Olives in case anyone
is there from California..don't complain, it's actually pretty good...)

Provide Ice Cold Beers and Soft Drinks in an "Iced Down Washtub, buy some "Western Themed" party dishes/paper plates, throw on the Tammy Wynette and Hank
Williams CDs, grab your PINK RHINESTONE BOOTS, and you've got yourself a
MIGHTY FINE COWGIRL BASH!!!

No need to wait for summer, you can do this indoors!

(I would like to point out here, that my imagination has certainly improved with
age....)

Serves 6-8 (could easily be doubled or tripled...Also, for those that like their food spicier than most, I would add more spice than what they call for..That's always true of my cooking, though..)

3 Tablespoons yellow cornmeal
3 Tablespoons chili powder
2 teaspoons black pepper
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon cumin
1 teaspoon oregano leaf (not ground oregano)
1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes (optional)
Pinch cayenne pepper(optional)
1 pound lean ground beef, drained after browning
1 1/2 pounds trimmed,smoked brisket,cubed (smoke it yourself or buy it already done)
3 cups onion, peeled and chopped, chunky
2 tablespoons oil
1 (28 ounce) can chopped tomatoes
1 (10.75 ounce) tomato puree
1 cup beer (optional)
2 cups water or vegetable stock
1 (15 ounce) can kidney beans, drained and rinsed
Fritos (the small size, not the large "dip" size)
If you want to serve as the restaurant does, just buy individual bags...Cute..

I mean, you don't HAVE to be "Cute"...

Most of the time, I am in no mood to be "Cute", so I totally understand if you just want to slap it on a paper plate, slide it across the counter, and say
"TIME TO EAT, YA'LL!!! GIMME A BEER, BUBBA!"

That is TOTALLY OKAY, as I don't think that "Bon Appetite" will be there taking
notes or snapping pictures...

Back to the recipe...

Saute in cast-iron skillet with no oil, and just until toasty brown, the yellow cornmeal, chili powder, black pepper, salt, cumin, oregano leaf, and red pepper flakes, and cayenne pepper. Set aside spices to add to chili later.

In separate skillet, brown lean ground beef, and drain. In large (4-to 6 quart) stock or bean pot, saute' chopped onion in 2 tablespoons of oil until pieces start to turn transparent. Add chopped garlic, ground beef and smoked brisket cubes.
Add roasted spices.

Add to pot, canned chopped tomatoes, tomato puree, 2 cups water or vegetable stock, drained kidney beans and 1 cup beer.

Simmer over low heat for at least 1 hour, stirring frequently. Add more water or vegetable stock, if chili seems too thick. If chili seems too thin, add additional cornmeal to thicken.
To increase "heat" to taste, any hot sauce may be added.

Serve chili over Frito corn chips, and let people add their own desired garnishes..

HARD TO BELIEVE

2009-03-31T13:50:00.008-05:00

Today is my youngest son's 18th Birthday..

This is something that I cannot seem to wrap my head around

I know that I am STILL not quite right after working last weekend (nightshift!)
(hopefully I will get used to the hours...must have a talk with my body...)

It has nothing to do with that, really...

It's just that it seems impossible to me that 18 years with him have passed
SO quickly!

Everything must have been set on " fast forward", when I thought that it was set
on "play"

Where was the "pause" button?

I realize that I am older, and I don't like that, but I am not hung up on it.
I do though, feel a mixture of both gratefulness and melancholy when it comes
to my son's birthday

Especially in the business that I am in, and with all I have seen, I feel very
blessed that he has reached the age of 18 in the good shape that he is in

He is a wonderful son, with a good heart, even if he IS a very difficult teenager
at times.

I adore him beyond what I can express.

I'm sure that you noticed the "birthday car" all wrapped up...

I seriously would LOVE to give him that car

I seriously would LOVE to give ME that car

I know that there ARE parents that give their kids that car

Especially in the school district where we reside..

Well, I have always felt that fantasy is extremely healthy

This is my "fantasy" gift to him

The thought of his reaction is so much fun to imagine!

Now don't feel sorry for this kid

I gave him my car when he turned 16, and it only had 60,000 miles on it

Still, it's not THIS car...

Motherhood has been the most challenging role of my life...

There have been GREAT JOYS AND LAUGHTER,
and sometimes impossibly deep and dark sadness,
fear, loneliness, and uncertainty

There is nothing else that has come close to affecting me as much as being the
Mother to two sons...

Eight years apart...different as night and day...

I have mixed feelings especially with my youngest son, growing up..

Certainly, a "loss" is felt, especially because you simply don't see them
as much anymore, and your relationship changes greatly..

Sometimes though,(not as often as I would like), an Adventurous Feeling comes
over me...

Now what will I do? Being a Mother has been my Central Role for so very long...

What on Earth will I do with myself?

Who knows what could happen..

Work, if I am lucky (and I am lucky "As We Speak"...)

Play with friends, when I/they have time...

Travel again, when the economy and my finances are a lot more stable...

Hope for some unknown horizons to open up...something that will interest me..

For my son, I wish Happiness, Good Health, Fulfillment in terms of School/Work;
that he finds a DREAM to hold onto, and that this Dream becomes his..

Strength, Faith, Friendship, Love, Wisdom ....I wish many things for him, but this is the "cliff notes" version....

On this day 18 years ago, I was blessed with this wonderful boy

It is a very special day for me as well...

We will go with my parents to eat at one of his favorite restaurants...

They serve GREAT Greek Food...

Eytyxismena Genethlia, son! (I'm not Greek, so I had to look that up )

La-breithe mhaith agat, son! (That's the "Irish-gaelic translation..I am of Irish
descent, and STILL had to look that up!)

How about good ol "Happy Birthday, son!" (now if I had to look that one up we'd
be in trouble....)

A POST ABOUT A DREAM TRIP PAST, A DREAM RESTAURANT GONE, AND A DREAM RECIPE STILL HERE...

2009-03-24T00:30:00.016-05:00

The first time that I took my son on vacation to Manhattan, we did so many wonderful
things..

I wanted him to Love the city as much as I did..

You would have thought that I was planning a trip for a "Prince"...

Then again, in my world, he was/is one...( um, more so as a child!)

I loved to spoil him this way when he was young, not always a smart move, but
certainly a fun one!

I DID and STILL DO love to spoil myself when I am able, as I KNOW that I SHOULD
BE SPOILED!

SMALL SIDE STORY...

(I went to an Astrological kind of a "Seance" when I was 18, along with a couple of friends..)

I did a lot of mystical, weird, cool stuff in the 70's...

There were about 20 people there..
We all sat in a large circle...
Lights were turned off..
Eventually a lit candle was passed from person to person..

The Seance began by the Astrological "Genie" that led the group...
A woman that reminded me of "Miss Havesham", the creepy looking woman in
"Great Expectations"..

She spoke some words, (don't remember what..probably wasn't paying attention)

After that there was what seemed to be a long period of absolute silence...

Words were said again by the "Genie"..

Silence resumed

The candle was passed to each person..

We were told that we might be able to see "what we had been or clues to our
identity from our "Past Lives"

It is true that things appeared..
Somewhat foggy but everyone wrote down what they
saw, so that the spirits would not be frightened away by sound

It was definitely on the creepy side...

Soon there were visions, seen by the entire group..

As I said, CREEPY

We did not see anything when the candle was passed to some people...

But with one of my friends, her face was transformed, and appeared as some kind
of war hero that had been badly injured..

Her face changed..I know that most won't believe it..

That hardly matters to me..

I know what I saw that night, and remember it clearly

So does my friend...

We are still friends.

We both remember that night...

NO WE WERE NOT DRUGGED!

I almost left, but was afraid to move...

SO GLAD I DIDN'T...

It certainly explained some things to me...

I am told that a "CROWN" floated above my head...

(LAUGHTER IS HEARD IN THE DISTANCE)

Did I see this? No..

But EVERYONE there said they did, wrote it down, and discussed it afterwards..

(LOUD YAWN)

But of course...My previous life as ROYALTY does not EVEN surprise me, people...

MOVING ON...

I do shy away from overused phrases, but seriously, I believe that if I don't spoil
myself, who is going to?

I spent a lot of money traveling for about 9 years

Money that some think that I should have saved, invested, (now THAT would have
been a SMART MOVE, right? That way I could have lost MORE in the Economic Drop)

Even now when I am frighteningly low on money/savings/everything, I WOULD NOT CHANGE A THING AND WOULD DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN...

NO REGRETS

NOTHING HAS BEEN AS DELIGHTFUL AS TRAVELING, AND DOING IT IN STYLE...

NOTHING...

IT HAS BEEN ONE OF THE MOST JOYOUS DIVERSIONS IN MY LIFE SO FAR...

I'm sure that a warm, loving, lasting marriage, or serious relationship would have been a great substitute, or being able to have my own puppy...

(Yes, I absolutely think that a great puppy/dog can make you almost as happy, and often even HAPPIER than a marriage/relationship.)

Hey, look at OPRAH! WHEN HAS SHE LOOKED THE HAPPIEST? WHEN SHE IS WITH STEDMAN
OR ONE OF HER PUPS? (don't say "When she is with Gayle,".. SHAME ON YOU!!)

I rest my case...

At the present time, I cannot afford travel, but I have my memories, which
are very special...(I, by the way, fully intend to delve back into the travel mode
at a later time..All is never lost..Just slowed down for the time being...)

There is a little something that most of you do not know about me...

(WELL THERE IS PROBABLY A LOT THAT YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME...AT THE RATE THAT I
AM BLOGGING, THAT WON'T LAST FOREVER...)

Planning trips, for me, or for anyone, is one of my GREATEST PLEASURES...

Over the years, and a lot of experience, I am very accomplished at this task..

Tell me where you want to go, budget (budge what?), and my research, planning,
and booking starts...

I do the flights, hotels, restaurants, museums, shows, attractions, history, tours, and anything interesting offered, if possible, ahead of time...

I DO leave time for spontaneity, contrary to popular opinion...

My son has always said, "Mom, can't you be more spontaneous? Must you do all of
this research before you're actually there?"

Let me answer this with a true to life example...

I have a friend who went with his wife to San Francisco, and had a horrible
time, just doesn't "GET" the San Francisco thing...

There is a reason for this..

They didn't know where to go, what to see...got completely lost several times, and ended up in confusion and frustration their entire time spent there...

I DID offer my services...but no interest was generated..."We hate to plan"...

"Preventable" would be the word that comes to mind, or is it "Stupid"?

SUCH A SHAME!(San Francisco being one of the best places in the WORLD!)

There is nothing that will RUIN a vacation quicker, besides having your luggage stolen, (don't ask), than to show up somewhere and not know what to do or where
to go, or to be unable to get tickets to an event, or to have to pay twice their worth, or to have to rely on the Concierge.

I have found over the years, that they will rarely steer you in the direction of
the most rewarding places or experiences...

They have this "list", and they rattle it off to everyone year after year..

Most of the time, they themselves have never been to these places...

I like to find experiences "off the beaten track"..

i.e. the BEST Haunted Tours, the BEST Art/Historical Museums/places to browse,
maybe a great local Improv Troupe that's preforming, Restaurants that are "Hidden Gems" and not "tourist traps",(which are often the Very Ones that your Concierge will recommend...)

I have nothing against the Concierge, as I have had a couple of good ones, but
have mostly found that they simply don't research their work as much as is
required...

Sometimes there is even a "Deal" made between the Restaurant and the Hotel.

This has NOTHING to do with the place being the best...

I assume that there's some kind of "kick-back", if nothing more, each place
recommends the other to up their businesses...

This is rarely to your advantage...

If you have the time and know how, all you need is a computer, a few books, and
an "Inquiring Mind"...

Or you could try a Travel Agent, though I myself have only had disappointing
experiences with them the two times that I have gone this direction..

I ended up having to do the work myself anyway...

The only time to use them is if they can actually get you a better price than
you can get yourself...This CAN happen, as far a hotel and airfare, so one should always check...That's all part of the planning...

Researching for a vacation takes a lot of time, but for me, it is part of the
fun, and it makes your trip so much more fun, as you rarely miss out on the very
best that your location has to offer...

Do I go on vacations where I lie on the beach and do nothing but chill?

Absolutely NOT. I can stay home and "chill" on the couch...

I have recommended and actually helped to plan many a trip, not only for myself,
but co-workers, or really anybody that has ever asked...

True to form, if you love what you do, then you will do it well...
Another one of my huge talents that pays me nothing..Not monetarily anyway..
.
I was obviously meant to do things that don't pay...

Now if I could only explain that to my rental office, insurers, credit companies..

They're quite obviously short sited...Poor Dears...

Back to my son's first trip to Manhattan...
It was a whirlwind of wonderful delights

It was Thanksgiving, a great time to visit, as all of the Christmas Festivities
have started, and it is a lot less crowded than Christmas..(though except for
Paris or Disneyworld, I can't think of a better place to spend Christmas)

You'd have thought that we'd won the Lottery

But we didn't

No matter, back then it was okay to live like it for a week...

We saw the Rockettes at Radio City Music Hall

Unknowingly I had purchased "VIP" tickets

When we arrived, we were treated to seats on the third row, and given huge
glossy "Rockette" programs

Soon after we were seated, we received baskets of popcorn, candy, drinks, and
mugs with the Rockettes on the front..Who knew?

It was almost embarrassing, and yet somehow we managed..

Radio City Music Hall is one of those place that MUST be seen before you die..

We saw "Hairspray", "Into the Woods", and "Lion King"...best seats in the house..

We had what's called a "VIEW ROOM" at our hotel,which meant that it overlooked
the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.

While others were freezing, we watched from our hotel with our windows open, and coats on!

I don't really approve of the hotels that have these "view rooms"... basically
ripping you off financially..charging way above what the room normally goes for...such a SHAM...Then again...

It was 17 degrees outside..I've never regretted it...

We had Thanksgiving Dinner at THE PLAZA HOTEL...

This was an amazing experience that deserves a blog entry to itself...

It was a WONDERFUL trip

We went to all of the places that I knew that both of us would like...

We also went to places that he did not like very much, but that I refuse not to go to when I am there...

i.e. Metropolitan Art Museum, Modern Art Museum, Jewelry Shopping in Soho and Greenwich Village..etc...

Poor baby...Somehow he just had to put up with that...(though he would not consider
it today..)

That's why you travel with your kid while they're young....though not too young..

On that particular trip, I had also signed up beforehand to join one of the best
"Foodie Tours" in the city for our first day there...

This one was an adventure of "tasting" at some of the best shops and restaurants,
as well as a history and architectural tour of the very charming, Greenwich Village.

One of my earlier posts, the one about Truman Capote, mentioned the incredible
architecture that still exists there...(and all over New York actually...)

Doors, gas lamps, walkways, gargoyles, interesting homes, iron fixtures, elaborate gates, etc, all from another Era long ago..
Still standing..
Awesome...

(Not to stray, but if you love wonderful history and architecture of this type, you
must also visit Charleston and Boston...)

We saw the first known "Speakeasy" that was opened during the Prohibition Period, along with hidden doors and escape routes that were commonly used..

At the time, it was still an open, functioning and popular Bar....
Glad that we got to see it, because about 2 years later, I was watching CNN and saw that it had burned down..
Too bad, a slice of history gone forever....

The foodie tour information stated when I ordered, that the tour goes on as
planned despite weather conditions.
(You'll find that ALL of them say that, and guess what? They MEAN it..)
They are all prepaid in advance..
I have NEVER been on one when the weather was anything but crazy...

That was actually fortunate for us, because it was raining, cold, and windy, so
only 6 of us showed up for the tour...(That's why they invented the Umbrella, though as I recall it only partially kept us dry that day, but we didn't care...)

PAUSE PLEASE FOR ANOTHER LITTLE STORY:

This "small group showing", has happened to my son and I NUMEROUS times..
VERY FORTUNATE..
One time it turned out to be a "private tour", as we were the only ones that showed up...

Scary...

It was just the two of us and a creepy tour guide at the well known oldest,
haunted jailhouse in Charleston...

The tour took place late at night...in a questionable area of the city...

It is said that the old jail's haunted with the Civil War Prisoners that never found their way to the "other world"...

My son was VERY quiet as we walked back to our hotel...

"Mom...I think that I saw a Ghost..."

And "YES" I believe in both Spirits and Aliens...
NO question in my mind...never has been

Back to the Greenwich Tour...

We got a lot of personal attention...My son especially got extra attention, as
he was the only kid on the tour..
He LOVED the experience, (though could have done without the extra attention,
as he was shy at that age...still is a bit...)

I have been on many foodie tours since, the last one being in the North End in Boston, but this particular tour will always be my favorite...

We were to meet at "Murray's Cheese Shop", probably one of the most famous cheese shops in this country, or any country for that matter...

Just a little cheese shop, but you could barely walk through, as it appeared as
though 1/2 of New York was there...

There's a reason for that...
Never have we sampled cheese that was this delicious...The varieties, endless..

This foodie tour included little "tastes" at all 13 places that were visited..

We had a particularly talented tour guide...To tell the truth, I was ready to marry him by the end of the tour...

SO "New Yorkish", Intelligent, Cute, "Edgy"...

(All the classic traits that have always attracted me..)

Love those Guys from up North...

Okay, Okay, TMI...I know...

Sorry, didn't mean to digress...Hmmmmm...Give me a moment..Memories..

We went to some wonderful shops and restaurants that day..

The idea was that you could visit and find out about these places, and at the
end of the tour, they presented you with a list of all the places visited.

It included the phone numbers and addresses, so that you could call and make reservations during the rest of your stay, if you so desired...

That particular Tour Company is the best one in New York, and is still in
business today..

Speaking of "today", most of our favorite places for food in New York, are either
in Greenwich or Soho, some of which we found out about on our tour years ago...

One place is called "Mamouns"..It has the BEST Falafel, Hummus, Baba Ghanoush, and Lamb Schwarma known to man..

Just writing about it makes my mouth water...

Cheap and Delicious Food...UNHEARD OF where I live...

We will actually take a cab all the way from the Theater District, just to order from this dumpy looking little place, and eat it standing up outside on the sidewalk, no matter what the weather, barely able to balance our paper plates,
while devouring this incredible food..

Needless to say, the cab ride costs more than the food...

SHAMEFUL!

NOT!

If you ever wonder why one would want to visit New York City, especially those not into Art or Theater,(a crying shame, indeed),the food itself is a reason not to
miss it...

It unfortunately will ruin you for life though...

There are certain foods that simply cannot be reproduced ANYWHERE ELSE in terms
of taste and quality...(Kind of like trying to reproduce the taste of Sourdough after you leave San Francisco, forget it...)

Don't get me started..

Suffice it to say that I have never felt sorry for anyone who is lucky enough to live in New York...

"Oh it's crowded, you can't have your own car, you have to take a Subway, it's
cold..."

Talk to the Hand...

Someone find a Violin...We're in need of some background music...

Back to the tour...

They only showed us what they considered to be the best places to eat and
experience Village "coolness"...

One of the places that we stopped at, I recognized immediately.

For years I subscribed to Gourmet Magazine, and I remembered that this place was highlighted and featured in one of their restaurant articles, years earlier...

(Ah...thanks...YES, MY MEMORY IS STUNNING, ISN'T IT?)

It was called "HOME." It is no longer open..

I feel lucky to have gone there a few times..

It was a JEWEL...

Owned by a husband and wife team, it was a very small and kind of dark little
place, with a kitchen about the size of a typical New York apartment, in other
words, about the size of a closet...

How the chef was able to turn out those incredible and creative dishes, is still beyond my imagination..

No question as to why it closed..To me, running a restaurant would be a
grueling job after awhile..
I heard that the owners are focusing only on their wine production now...

Sounds like more fun, and more freedom...Good for the marriage..

The couple, David Page and Barbara Shinn, lived outside the city, on a farm where
they grew Organic Vegetables and also produced their own wine at their Vineyard..

All of the food and wines served at the restaurant came from there...

Dishes were almost like "home cooking" but elevated way above anything that one
gets at home...

They were very popular, their menu was small, and their place was quaint and cute, just exactly as I would have imagined a Greenwich Village restaurant.

It was love at first site for me, and my son liked it as well, so I called right
after the tour and made reservations during the week while we were there...

They were infamous for their Brunch on Saturday and Sunday, and reasonable for lunch
Mon-Friday, but as usual, I HAD to go for Dinner, my favorite meal out....

As usual, my son was the only child in the restaurant..

This was true of my older son as well..
Both of them were taken to good restaurants early in their lives

They both appreciated good food in good restaurants
Of course, not to toot my own horn, but they were used to good food at home...

(The truth can set you free, remember that...)

Waiters initially slightly raised their eyebrows...

By the end of the meal, they were ready to give the kid a tip!

My boys were raised well in that way

They ALWAYS acted appropriately at restaurants, nice places in general

This is why I still shake my head in amazement, when I see the way some kids
act out in restaurants and shops...

I would SO leave those kids home...in a heartbeat...

You've gotta start them early, or leave them home...

My son and I were seated in one of the 6 wooden booths, and there was only
candlelight, so it was not easy to see the menu, but we managed after all..

I know that I was not nearly as blind back then...
Neither one of us wore glasses then, as a matter of fact...

I remember that this was the first place that my son decided that he liked Duck,
as that is what he ordered...

Lucky that he was at a great restaurant...

There's nothing worse than Duck cooked inappropriately...

There's nothing better when it's done well...

The bread was fragrant and tasty, the side dishes of vegetables tasted like none that we had ever tasted before.

This was before anyone offered "Organic" ANYTHING...

Before "Whole Foods" became one of our favorite places to shops on EARTH...

We remembered what our "Foodie Guide" had said about saving room for their most popular dessert..

He said that it was "beyond description"...

That there were no words to do it justice..

It was their version of "chocolate pudding."..

Chocolate Pudding?

I was never a huge fan even as a child, and faintly remembered something about a
possible rubbery formation that can occur on the top of the pudding...

My son's reference point was the jello packs of pudding which are barely tolerable.

We went ahead and ordered it with open minds...

There have only been two times while dining with my son, where we looked up at each other, with eyes widened, without a word spoken, after our first bites of a dish.

We were completely silenced and in what appeared to be "temporary paralysis", due
to the taste sensation that was occuring...

Once was when we were in Vancouver and were eating our first Chinese food in that
city.

It was and still is, the BEST Chinese Food that we have ever tasted..

There is NO comparison to any other Chinese, not in New York, San Francisco, you
name it..

Haven't been to China, not yet anyway, so maybe that will prove the exception...

The only other time we were in "Silent Tastebud Shock", was when we first
tasted the Chocolate Pudding at "Home"..

Even though that wonderful restaurant is gone now, we are in luck...

I purchased the restaurant's cookbook, filled with their best dishes/recipes

(At this point I could use a storage unit for my collection of cookbooks, if anyone
wants to chip in for the rental money...)

I have already feature one of Home's wonderful recipes on Foodbuzz..

"Blue Cheese Fondue with Rosemary Toasts"

A great starter...never missed...Wonderful....

Of course, as it turns out, HOME'S version of Chocolate Pudding is nothing
like the normal one, where you stand at the stove, stirring, and then put
it in the frige...

Like most things that are very special, it is a bit more time consuming and
complex...

What can I tell you? If you do this recipe you will be spoiled for life, when
it comes to chocolate pudding or any mousse that you may have had previously..

And now for "Home's Chocolate Pudding"

4 cups of Heavy Cream

5 ounces Bittersweet Chocolate (see Note), finely chopped

6 Large Egg Yolks

1/2 cup Granulated Sugar

1 teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Pinch of Salt

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees.

Bring the heavy cream to a simmer in a large heavy saucepan, then remove the pan from the heat.

Place the chocolate in a large stainless-steel bowl, add 1 cup of the warm cream, and let stand until the chocolate is melted. Sir the chocolate mixture until it is smooth, then stir in the remaining cream.

In a separate large bowl, whisk together the egg yolks, sugar, vanilla, and salt.

Gradually whisk in the chocolate mixture. Strain the pudding through a fine-mesh strainer and skim off the froth on the top.

Pour the pudding into eight 6-ounce ovenproof ramekins. Place them in a deep baking pan and put the pan in the oven.

Carefully add enough hot water to the pan to reach halfway up the sides of the ramekins, then cover the pan with aluminum foil.

Bake the puddings for about 50 minutes.

When gently shaken, they should look set around the edges, but not quite set in a quarter-sized area at the center.

Remove the ramekins from the water bath and let cool at room temperature.

Refrigerate for several hours or overnight.

Served chilled

Could top with whipped cream, but I wouldn't want to "cut" the chocolate taste..

Serves 8 "Normal" people with admirable amounts of Willpower and Restraint

NOTE: Bittersweet chocolate has sugar, vanilla, and lecithin added to the pure chocolate liquor and cocoa butter. Although semisweet usually has more sugar, the two are pretty much interchangeable in recipes...

MY PERSONAL NOTE: In this day and age, with the availability of every kind of
chocolate known to man, my advice is that you buy the best quality Bittersweet
Chocolate that you can afford for this dish..The quality will reward you in the
end...If there was ever a recipe where "chocolate is the star", it's this one...

THRASHING MYSELF INTO OBLIVION..

2009-03-22T19:46:00.011-05:00

WHAT HAPPENED...

I woke up to a phone call this morning, I looked over at my bedside alarm clock, and the time said 1:25..I could tell by the light outside that it was hardly 1:00 in the morning, plus I felt like I had been sleeping for awhile, so I KNEW that things were not right...

It was 7:30 am...I was suppose to be at work at 6:45 am...

By the time that I made it to the phone, the call was already a message which said, "Hi..did you know that you were supposed to be at work today? We have had many call-ins and really need you...Call me back as soon as you get this message..."

Of course I KNEW that I worked today...I actually got to work yesterday, and they said that they would probably need me today as well...I was thrilled, as the weekend pay is the highest...

My heart sank, as I realized that my clock had somehow malfunctioned, and GUILT began to settle in, and I remembered that I had not gotten to bed until 1 am last night, due to getting home late from work, and working on this blog, which had for some reason screwed up...
Couldn't go to bed with it screwed up...MUST FIX!

So I did...and sleep became my second priority...

(All the while, gearing up slowly but powerfully for a session of Self Thrashing
and Loathing, something practiced and perfected..All too familiar in my life...)

Maybe if I had gone to bed a couple of hours after I got home from work like "normal people" do, I would have heard the FIRST phone call, and gotten up even though the clock had malfunctioned.. The manager said that they rang at 5 am this morning, to reinforce the "YES, WE NEED YOU TODAY"...
I didn't hear it or if I did it didn't register...

Was I exhausted from my shift yesterday?...Yes...
Was it a difficult shift, working four of the FLOORS?
Always..What's new? I rarely have had to work them..It's a nightmare assignment..

EVERYTHING hurts after 12 hours on their floors..This hospital has floors like no other..It's gruesome for those half my age..

Back to the story...

I called back as quickly as possible, and the manager said, "It's okay, we found someone else to work..No problem, sorry that your clock malfunctioned...We thought that something was wrong...No Problem, just stay home, we have it covered..No..No..Don't come in...seriously, we have it covered..."

I only have two shifts left at this hospital, which I will most likely get cancelled from, as they are weekday shifts, when the staffing is more plentiful....

I needed that money...

MY PREDICTABLE THOUGHTS AND REACTION...

I COULD HAVE MADE ALMOST $500 DOLLARS TODAY AND NOW DUE TO MY STUPIDITY AND THAT FRIGGIN MALFUNCTIONING CLOCK, I HAVE LET IT SLIP THROUGH MY FINGERS!

LOOOOOOSSSSSSEEEEEERRRRRRR!

HOW COULD YOU LET THIS HAPPEN???????

I ALMOST FELT ILL...MY HEAD SANK IN DISAPPOINTMENT..IN BEWILDERMENT...IN OUTRAGE..

THE WORDS SPEWED FROM MY LIPS LIKE FIRE FROM A DRAGON..

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? ARE YOU COMPLETELY DAFT? YOU CAN'T AFFORD MISTAKES!!!

IDIOT...IMBECILE...DOOFUS...MORON...

DIMWIT...AIRHEAD...DUMB ASS...

BIMBO...BOZO..BUFFOON!!!!!!!!

(FIVE MINUTES PASSED WITH MY HEAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE I REMEMBERED THAT IT WAS ELECTRIC!)

YOU CAN'T EVEN DO AWAY WITH YOURSELF PROPERLY, YOU NINNIE!

OF COURSE, I JEST, BUT IT ALWAYS AMAZES ME HOW LITTLE SLACK THAT I ALLOW MYSELF,
YET IF IT WERE ANYONE ELSE, I WOULD REALIZE THAT THESE THINGS CAN AND DO HAPPEN
TO PEOPLE ON OCCASION...BUT NOOOOO....

I HAVE TO TAKE IT TO THE EXTREME, AND CONSIDER ALL OF MY FAULTS; HABITS, PRACTICES THAT MIGHT HAVE "LEAD" ME TO THIS EVENT...

WISH I COULD JUST SAY, "I WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO THE CLOCK? ODD..OH WELL..NOT THE
END OF THE WORLD...LA DE DA....LA DE DA..."

IN ANOTHER LIFETIME, PERHAPS...ANOTHER UNIVERSE...

I DID FIX THE BLOG, I THINK...

WOW...THAT'LL PAY MY BILLS, NOW WON'T IT?

EXCUSE ME, LET ME REMOVE THE NAILS FROM MY TEETH SO THAT YOU CAN UNDERSTAND ME...

AND IN THE END...

I WAS SO DISTRESSED THAT I WENT TO MY PIANO.
I PLAYED FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MANY MONTHS...
HAVEN'T TOUCHED IT SINCE I LOST MY JOB...
WAS LOOKING FOR ANYTHING TO COMFORT ME...
THROUGHOUT MY LIFE, IT IS THE ONE THING THAT ALWAYS HAS

MY FATHER WOULD BE PLEASED
HE TOLD ME THAT HE COULD TELL THAT I WASN'T PLAYING
HE SAID THAT I WASN'T THE SAME

I GUESS I NEVER REALIZED THAT IT WAS EVIDENT IN MY PERSONALITY
IT WAS PROBABLY JUST AN OVERALL LACK OF JOY THAT HE DETECTED
NOT SURE HOW HE KNEW
MAYBE BECAUSE HE IS MY FATHER

I WONDERED WHY HE EVEN ASKED ME ABOUT IT
I KNEW THAT HE SENSED THAT I HAD TURNED AWAY FROM IT
STILL, HE OFTEN ASKED,"ARE YOU PLAYING YOUR PIANO?"

GUESS HE WANTED TO SEE IF I WOULD LIE TO HIM
I DID, BUT NOT WITHOUT A FAIRLY DECENT REASON
I DID NOT WANT TO DISAPPOINT HIM

THEN HE READ A BLOG ENTRY IN WHICH I STATED THAT I WAS NOT PLAYING
I KNEW THAT HE WOULD READ IT
THINK IT WAS MY WAY FOR HIM TO FIND OUT THAT I WAS LYING ABOUT IT

SO TODAY, I GUESS I WANTED TO SEE IF I COULD STILL PLAY/SING
I WAS DISTRAUGHT
DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF
NEEDED TO ESCAPE

HAVE ALWAYS FELT LIKE I WAS SOMEWHERE ELSE WHEN I AM ON THE PIANO
A PLACE WHERE THE SELF LOATHING ENDS
AND THE FEELINGS OF GRATEFULNESS BEGIN

NOT SURE WHAT I WOULD HAVE DONE IN MY LIFE WITHOUT IT

DID A DECENT VERSION OF JONI'S "RIVER".
ACTUALLY IT WAS BETTER THAN DECENT
AMAZING FOR NOT HAVING TOUCHED THE KEYS FOR SO LONG
WAS RELIEVED THAT MY FINGERS DIDN'T FAIL ME

SOME THINGS ARE NEVER FORGOTTEN

WHEN I WAS A LITTLE GIRL, I REALIZED THAT I HAD BEEN GIVEN A GIFT..

FROM EARLY ON, I DISCOVERED THAT I COULD PLAY ANYTHING THAT I COULD HEAR

SOMETHING SPECIAL THAT ONLY I COULD DO..(AS FAR AS I KNEW AT THAT AGE..)

SOMETHING I LOVED SO MUCH...
AS WITH EVERYTHING THAT IS "LOVED SO MUCH"
THERE IS A QUIET BUT SUSTAINABLE FEAR FELT, BUT UNSPOKEN...

I WAS FEARFUL THAT SOMEONE OR SOMETHING COULD TAKE IT AWAY FROM ME
I REMEMBER WONDERING WHO OR WHAT COULD TAKE IT AWAY
I HAD RECENTLY SEEN A MOVIE THAT AT ONCE CAME TO MIND

IT OCCURRED TO ME THAT IF I BECAME BLIND LIKE HELEN KELLER, I COULD NO LONGER
PLAY..
THAT WAS THE LAST DAY OF MY LIFE THAT I ALLOWED MYSELF TO LOOK AT THE KEYS

TO THIS DAY, IF I LOOK AT THE KEYS, I CAN'T PLAY AS WELL
EVEN AT THAT YOUNG AGE, I FELT THE NEED FOR CONTROL OVER MY WORLD, MYSELF..

I WAS A SERIOUS LITTLE GIRL

I HAVE ALWAYS FOUND SOLACE AND RESPECT AT MY PIANO
IT LIGHTENS MY SPIRIT
IT HAS NEVER FAILED ME
NOT IN YEARS PAST
NOT TODAY

IT IS ALWAYS A PLACE THAT I CAN GO TO SEEK

MAGIC

THE ROTISSERIE CHICKEN MIRACLE

2009-03-18T01:04:00.011-05:00

It SEEMED like a typical day..Don't remember why I was running behind...I suppose just a lot of errands....By the time I got to the store it was late afternoon. I didn't want dinner at 10PM, but at this rate if I tried to cook the chicken myself, it was going to be too late..

I decided to buy a Rotisserie Chicken, to save time on whatever I decided that I would do for that night...

AH, THE MIRACULOUS ALREADY PREPARED ROTISSERIE CHICKEN....THE ANSWER TO SO MANY PROBLEMS, THE HEART OF SO MANY "HOME COOKED" DISHES..

When I got home, I started taking the meat off the delicious smelling chicken, dividing the white meat from the dark, and picking off every morsel of meat...I found that there was quite a lot of breast meat, especially after I tore it into shredded pieces..

About this time, I realized what it was that I was going to attempt, even though if you read my blog, I had proclaimed in "For the Love Of Enchiladas", that I had "thrown in the towel" when it came to Sour Cream Chicken Enchiladas...

As I mentioned in that entry, you really must live in Texas to get what we call the REAL DEAL when it comes to "Tex-Mex"..It is seriously the BEST variety of Mexican Food not only to me, but any of us that live here..

I have always LOVED really good sour cream chicken enchiladas, with melted white cheese, a tart and delicate sour cream sauce topping, along with a garnish of jalapeno...

This craving and search for a recipe to make at home, was based on a couple of places that have the BEST ones that I have ever had.
Over the years I had tried literally 12 or 15 different recipes, some contained cans of cream of chicken soup (which I am NOT a fan of), and some with sour cream that "topped" the enchiladas after they were cooked, (nope, that wasn't it..,)and sauces with a green tomatillo and sour cream base, and even one that called for whipping cream and swiss cheese...None of these were bad, it's just that none of them were RIGHT....

I gave up and realized that eating them out, and at only a few places, was my destiny, and I tried my best to get on with my life....(though it was not always easy...And if you have gotten to know my personality at all, then you realize that NOT BEING ABLE TO FIGURE SOMETHING OUT is a bit frustrating for a girl like me...)

As you know, I am not a fan of begging, so I had even quit trying to obtain the correct sour cream sauce from the restaurants...

I know that stranger things have happened, but very soon after I wrote the enchilada blog, I started looking in some very old recipe folders, and found one recipe that I had saved, yet curiously had never tried...

I looked it over carefully...I liked the sauce, but it was not quite right...It needed something...hmmmmm...The actual chicken in the tortillas went without seasoning, which was NOT RIGHT, as the great ones always have a red hue to them, and are spicy...

With a little creative problem solving, I recreated the recipe, incorporating some of the sauce ingredients and measurements with great success..

I KNEW when I was cooking it that I had actually after YEARS, finally come up with it...I didn't say anything to my son, who was playing his video games, asking, "WHEN IS DINNER READY? WHAT ARE WE HAVING?"

When he sat down to dinner, and dug into his first bite, he was silenced...I puttered about a little bit in the kitchen getting my plate ready, and about 5 seconds passed, when I heard "MOM, THESE ARE THE BEST ENCHILADAS THAT I HAVE EVER HAD...MOM...THESE ARE RIGHTOUS...MOM..THESE ARE SO GOOD... and on and on...Yes, I had finally FOUND THE RIGHT ONES!!!!!!!!!!"

DRUMROLL PLEASE.......

THE BEST SOUR CREAM CHICKEN ENCHILADAS

Serves 4-6 in YOUR HOUSE... depending on side dishes served...I recommend Mexican Rice for sure...
Does not serve as much when teenage boys are present

1/4 cup butter
1/4 cup all purpose flour
10 3/4 ounces chicken broth undiluted, with a small bit of fresh lemon juice added
3/4 cup water
8 ounces sour cream (not lite)
2 large or 3 small canned whole jalapeno peppers (seeded and chopped)..I DID NOT seed them because mine were not very hot...You decide..
10-12 corn tortillas
2 1/2 cups chicken breast meat, shredded with your hands, no really large chunks, but not "ground"..just shredded pieces that will lay nicely in the tortillas
2-3 cups shredded Monterey Jack Cheese
3/4 cup chopped onion
Additional sliced canned jalapeno for garnish (optional)

SPICES FOR CHICKEN
It is difficult for me to tell you exactly how much of the following spices to use, as it is so dependent on one's tolerance for spicy...You decide...Spice then taste to adjust...I am a spicy kind of girl, so I did not go lightly, but tasted as I went

Good Chili Powder..( I like Gebbardt )
Cumin
Ground Comino
Garlic Powder
A pinch of Oregano
Salt
Ground Pepper

PREPARATION:
Take the shredded chicken breast meat and mix it with the spices above..Mix it with your hands so that all the spices are rubbed into the chicken..Your chicken should be spicy and have a red color...Taste, and set aside..

Melt butter in a heavy saucepan over low heat;add flour, stirring until smooth. Cook one minute, stirring constantly.(This is certainly one of those stand at the stove recipes)

Gradually add chicken broth and water; cook over medium heat, stirring constantly, until thickened and bubbly (this will take a few minutes on medium heat..don't rush it...)

When it is thickened put a couple of Tablespoon of it into your sour cream first, then stir all of your sour cream mixture back into the saucepan, along with the chopped peppers. Take it off the heat...

Pour about half of the sour cream sauce into a lightly greased 12x8x2 inch baking dish, spreading it out to make sure that it covers the entire bottom of the dish, and set aside dish and remaining sour cream sauce.

Take about 3 or 4 tortillas at a time, and enclose them, stacked, between moistened paper towels on a paper plate for about 20 seconds or so in the microwave on high...When they come out, they should be HOT and pliable.

Fill them with at least a Tablespoon of the chicken, a little onion, and a little cheese. Roll up and place in the baking dish, seam side down, side by side...Repeat with the remaining tortillas until all are filled. You may end up with 9 tortillas or 12, depending on how much filling that you want to use in each one...I ended up with about 9, I think...

When you have filled them all and they're all in the baking dish, cover them with the rest of the sour cream sauce.

Bake, uncovered, at 425 for about 20 minutes, maybe a bit longer..watch closely..
Remove them from the oven, and scatter the rest of the cheese and any leftover onion on top...( you should have at least 1 1/4 cups of cheese, if you don't, grate some more...)

Top with some of the jalapeno slices, if you wish, or you can sprinkle them over the enchiladas after they are cooked..(again...optional, but I love them)

Bake an additional 5 minutes or until cheese is nicely melted and gooey...

Notes: I cannot help but think that they would be even MORE delicious made with homemade chicken broth...(I'm sure of it, and if I did, I would probably use a bit more chicken broth, and less water...)
I did the tortillas in the microwave instead of dipping them in hot oil, so that it was somewhat of a lower fat recipe..It worked...
I added a bit of fresh lemon juice to the chicken broth, because the BEST versions appear to have a slightly tart taste, but not overwhelming, so I added this, and I think that it worked well..

I DO hope that you will try these, as they completely and absolutely ROCK!

Oh, and I PROMISE THAT THE NEXT POST WILL NOT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH CHICKEN!!!!

A GIRL'S JUST GOTTA HAVE FUN...YEAH GIRLS GOTTA HAVE...GIRLS GOTTA HAVE...THEY JUST WANNA HAVE FUN!

2009-03-16T21:08:00.004-05:00

I am thinking about two places that I could be this week, that I am not...I have had two invitations to go out of town for enjoyable experiences, which I am MORE than in need of at this point, yet here I am, staying home because I am on the schedule at a hospital that calls me 75 percent of the time and cancels me...

Sometimes I have to stop and wonder, if Reincarnation is true, what in the world did I do in my former lives? Must have been really negative things, either that or there has been some big mistake, and my life got accidentally switched with someone Else's and it's all a HUGE MISUNDERSTANDING...

If that's true, it needs to be cleared up NOW!

So, I could either be in Colorado in a large beautiful custom made cabin on top of the mountain, playing guitar and harmonizing with my oldest friend, playing the tunes we played in clubs in the 70s, just mellowing out and enjoying the mountain air, reminiscing, and chillin, staying in a room that actually had me in mind when it was being built, so you might say "custom made for Moi"
OR
I could be in Austin, where I just got a call a couple of hours ago from a wonderful friend, who wanted me to come up for the Independent Film Festival that is going on this week. She actually called me from the festival.. She had just met Timothy Hutton, and many others, ( she is the type of girl that men adore IMMEDIATELY..beautiful, smart, funny, charming, interesting...what's not to love?) She's probably already hanging out with the coolest people...writers, directors, there...I could be hanging out with her, which would put me hanging out with the cool people as well( see how that works? Not that I can't make friends with the cool people myself, it's just that, hey...if the work is already done by the time you get there, why not?)

BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I NEED TO STAY HERE AND WAIT FOR FRIGIN PHONE CALLS AT 5 AM IN THE MORNING THAT SAY THAT I AM CANCELLED, OR EVEN BETTER, POSSIBLY GO TO WORK, AND GET PUT ON THE GENERAL FLOORS RATHER THAN PEDIATRICS, SO THAT I CAN PULL ALL OF MY HAIR OUT AT FREQUENT POINTS THROUGHOUT THE DAY, TO THE POINT THAT WHEN I GET OFF OF WORK, I WILL HAVE TO STOP BY WALMART AND HOPE THAT THEY HAVE A SPECIAL ON WIGS, BECAUSE I WILL, AT THAT POINT, BE IN NEED OF ONE...

I will be seriously surprised if I have ANY friends down the line, as I am always having to say "no", and who wants to put up with that forever? If it's not the schedule thing, then it's the money thing...Everything cost money..Especially what and where my friends like to go..
I simply cannot spend any that I don't HAVE to spend right now..I am afraid that I might run out before I start getting some kind of steady work...

I DID go to a very lovely dinner party with a few old friends the other night..I dreaded going at first, because I really did not want to talk about my situation.It ended up, of course, being absolutely wonderful...Very special..
The crystal and silver shined, the wines were indeed flowing, the planked salmon was cooked to perfection on the grill, and the dining room itself with its loving antiques transformed me to another time...a time I would have glowed in...

The Turn of the Century...I'm reading a Biography at the present about the American Writer, Edith Wharton...Her story takes place around the Turn of the Century...If you had money like Edith did, it would be a very grand life indeed...
I love to escape into the world of literature...Nothing soothes me more...
Now if I could just get back on my piano..
I have NEVER ignored it this long in my entire life..
The longer it goes on, the more hesitant I am to get on it..
It will be an uphill battle, to come up to speed...
I lie to everyone when asked and tell them that I still play it all the time like I usually do, so as not to upset them...
TWO THINGS THAT I MUST GET BACK TO DOING THAT I USED TO DO PRACTICALLY EVERY DAY and now do not do at all since October

1. Use my Gym membership...Jeez, I could use that for help with taming the fires that erupt in me so frequently these days...Good for the bod, great for stress

2. I have been playing the piano since as far back as I remember being alive...I play by ear, and play well...That is a gift...This gift was ALWAYS something that
has soothed me throughout the years...Why I have abandoned it for 6 months defies
explanation...That has to stop...I must play while my fingers will still move....

This pathetic contract is up at the end of March, and it could not come too soon.

I COULD JUST BITE NAILS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You know how they say that people get more mellow as they age?
WELL, I MUST NOT BE AGING!

On the "slightly" positive side, I DID nab a couple of PRN positions today... (once again no full-time jobs available)

One of them wants to use me for weekend NIGHTS (AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! In 27 years I have NEVER worked 12 hour nights, and it will be a frigin miracle if I don't fall asleep, but the money was too good to pass up...)

The other hospital was FULL of all of the people that I knew at my last full time job where we were all laid off...It was definitely a "homecoming" of sorts, people were genuinely very excited to see me, heck I might as well as been a "Rock Star"..
"OH MY GOD!...ARE YOU COMING TO WORK HERE? WE NEED YOU! WE NEED SOME GOOD ENTERTAINMENT...TRAVEL ADVICE...RESTAURANT REVIEWS...WE TALK ABOUT YOU ALL OF THE TIME...YOU HAVE BEEN SO MISSED...OH MY GOD!!!"

Lovely that my extracurricular talents are appreciated, but I REALLY am there to do therapy...I DID find out that one of my quadriplegic patients that I have taken care of for many years was there in the hospital, and I did stop in to see him...
That was bittersweet...He looked worse than usual...He has lost almost all of his hearing now...Of course he never recognizes me when I first see him...
He was injured about 13 years ago, on the slopes in Colorado, his first time on skies...

He broke his neck...

In telling me the story a few years ago when he was "more together", he said that when he fell, he knew that he had broken his neck...He heard the "snap"...When his brother in law caught up with him on the mountain, he said "C'mon ya big weenie, get up!"...My patient said "I broke my neck"...for a few minutes nobody believed him...There was no blood...No outward to be seen injury...

Struck down at the prime of his life..around 30 years old...Fanatic baseball player...Husband...Father of two children...Wonderful and Brave....The injury left him a quadriplegic, with no short term memory at all, and less and less of a long term memory as time goes on...The antibiotics needed to keep him alive by battling his constant infections have now taken his hearing away..He still smiles when you greet him..not only with his mouth, but his eyes..
He is impossible not to love...impossible not to become too close too...
I lost that battle years ago..
His wife was there...Very kind...VERY strong...
This is the work that I had to leave when the hospital closed down last October...I had to leave all of these patients that I have had for 12 years...
I have missed them...
I have mourned....
For me, it has been far worse than "losing the job"...
It has been "losing my work" which has almost felt at times like too much to handle..
I know that people say that God never gives you more than you can handle, but in making reference to my earlier thought...MAYBE I ACCIDENTALLY GOT MIXED UP WITH SOMEONE ELSE!!!

They really won't be able to use me much there though...not quite busy enough yet..
New hospital and all...

One of my good friends is one of the owners of the hospital, and he really wanted me to apply so I did..

More for him than for me...

I personally did not get full time there when it opened...

My two coworkers were hired full time...There were only two slots, and I was passed over...

It was VERY difficult for me to go today and apply for this "PRN" job, as I told myself that I would NEVER set foot in there

I never wanted to see my Medical Director again, because it hurt me so much that he did not choose me...

Funny how the longer you go without a job, the more kinds of things that you will do...
Never thought that I would accept a job working nights...
Never thought that I would apply for a job at the other place....
The word "NEVER" has proven NEVER to be safe to use...
Think that I will drop it from my vocabulary, as it is useless to me...

Tired now...Started out the day saving an adult and infant mannikin's life...
(CPR re certification!)
Yep...think the post that I was going to post, called,
"MY LONG SEARCH IS OVER" will have to wait till next time
Hope everyone is healthy and happy
Until then......