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Friday, June 19, 2009

Last poem for Kerin


I was surprised a couple of week ago, when I arrived in a room at the hospital, to take care of

my "new patient" that had just arrived.

It was Kerin, the patient that I had taken care of at the previous hospital where I worked, the young woman with the very, very severe head injury, who I called "Cat woman" and wrote a previous poem about, here on my blog...It was written on 4/19 and was entitled, "Nowhere"

It affected me to see her, take care of her again, as she was so very much more unresponsive, and looked so much worse...I will not elaborate, because it is too much, believe me...

I think that this poem has somewhat helped me to put her to rest...

Some of it just takes a bit of time...Nothing that I have not had to deal with before...




Once Again, For Kerin

9/19/09


she came once
again

but didn't stay
long

she scared me
this time

her head

just so
wrong

how much
are you
going to
take from
this girl

whose left
all she's known
and is far
from this world?

why can't you
just stop and
leave her alone

allow her to
pass from this
world on her
own

I searched
too deeply
inside of
her tomb

The darkness
so frightening
the silence,
the doom

All dignity
lost
and the
whiteness
of light

the sound
of machines
from morning
to night

I gazed at the
photos

her cats....
there were three

She loved them
they've lost her

they wander
and grieve

I called her
"Cat woman"

her eyes
stuggled
so

just where
had I
come from?

but she
didn't
know

it's something
that I
simply
can't
understand

just why
are they
living?

My anger
demands!

it's horrid,
and tragic,
just how did
she rate,
this seemingly
lifeless and
nightmarish
state?

why can't she
just rest
like we all
hope to
do

when life
and its
struggles
are finally
through?

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Quick but needed update to my faithful followers


Like the new avitar? I do...

It's about as realistic as the last one...
Neither of them look anything like me, though I absolutely FEEL like both of them, as somewhere inside, thoses photos are lurking...

They are certainly who I represent on the INSIDE...
I do not take good photos...Some people do, I am just not one of them...
I am ALWAYS better looking in person, as most will attest...
Even in keeping with that fact, I do not have a recent photo to put there, or I probably would...
I don't as of yet, (soon to change) have a computer situation that has photos on it, so I simply must use other photos at this time...
Honestly, though I look nothing like this woman or the last, I'm told that I don't hurt the eyes terribly, I promise...
I wanted to post a quick entry, to my faithful followers, to let you know that things at work are better, and that yes, it looks as though I am going to survive...
It has been one helluva hard course, and still has its bumps in the road, but after this last weekend, it appears as though some of my "we don't like you" co-
hearts have loosened their bogus first impressions, and actually appear as though "maybe we do like you..."
Just wanted all of you to know, who have suffered along with me in this horrendous new path, that it appears as though things will work out in the end...
I am happier now and hopeful, and I just wanted all of you to know....
LATER....NICOLE...