Now I know that these are probably meant to beoffices, and they certainly look like what I might see if I were to jump on the Tollway right next to my apartments, and cruise downtown, the beautiful Emerald skyscraper lit up amongst the other modern designs of slate/ steel/ and glass, glass, and more glass.../That very glass would inable us to see quite clearly through those high rise window, and we would see more people than we would guess, still up there working in their offices at almost 3 am...(Of course I honestly have to admit that I have seen FAR too many of those scary movies where some girl is alone at night in her office and only "Jerry" the guard is downstairs on the first floor and her office is on the 8th floor...She diligently begins this work that just MUST be finished before the 10 am presentation the next morning and she is so involved and fatigued, that she doesn't hear the first "clanking" sound that comes from the end of her hall...She goes out into the hall on the second "clank," and peers both ways down the dark deserted hallway, gets creeped out, and turns around and locks her office door...Well now, you know what happens after that...That is where in some theaters you may hear people scream at the character as though they can heed the advice that the audience is very seriously and obnoxiously yelling at them..."DON' T TURN AROUND GIRL...UH UH NAWWWWW...LOOK OVER THERE, LOOK OUT...RUUUUUUNNNNNNNN GIRL RUNNNN YOUR ASS OUTTA THAT OFFICE"...You know, you've been there! Sometimes it's annoying, sometimes it's funny, er...most times it's annoying...
It is weird to be up at this time of night, because no matter where you are, you feel like you are the only one up...It's kind of a cool and "fun I'm all by myself and I can do anything!"..Well I suppose the piano,especially my electric one is out...A bit too loud for my sleeping teenage son, and the neighbors in general ...Except the one DIRECTLY UPSTAIRS. Do not ask me WHEN or IF this man ever sleeps, because I have no evidence of this. I can still hear his Godzilla feet walk across the floor no matter what time of day or night it is...If i didn't have a son, who has supplied me with an enormous amount of experience in knowing what the video games can sound like, I would have long ago called the police thinking that there were "bombs" going off in his apartment, but no...it just sounds like a game of my son's turned up very loud and probably in super surround sound...There are others sometimes heard across the courtyard...People keep the oddest hours..Since I don't have a regular schedule for work anymore, or when I do they sometimes cancel me at 5 in the morning, I have been keeping very strange hours...I actually went to bed at 4 am last night and got out of bed around 1:30! (SHAMEFUL HUSSY!) And when I do work, I foolishly don't go to bed until around midnight and have to get up before 5....This makes me feel like a loser on one hand, and woman of means on the other...Oh well...when I go back to working someplace full time, I will remember these reclusive wonderful little late night times by myself, and remember them fondly..That is how I choose to think about it..Now tommorow, I will go back into my "what's gonna happen, and how long can I financially keep all of this up" mind set...I resist staying in that mode for long unless I can think of something to do (phone calls/faxing my resume to a new place)...Otherwise I don't allow myself to go bonkers...Not over this...There have honestly been other things in my life that were more worthy of going nuts. I resisted the full fledge nutcase scenario then, and I shall now..The first 6 weeks were particularly hard, even though I went on an "already paid for" vacation and stayed at the Wynn Hotel in Vegas surrounded by complete luxury..I decided to allow myself to have a good time...( I even got two extra night out of it due to the heavy snow that closed the Vegas Airport for years! I never said that I wasn't lucky...)Speaking of Vegas...there are some phenominal deals in Vegas right now, even at the Wynn, and THIS is the time to go if you can pay for it and/or get away...Hell, I've said it a million times...You've got money, and you're not one of the ones that could get laid off....WHO HOOOO! Flights to Europe are 1/2 of what they were this time last year...good rate exchange in Canada right now...homes/cars/ hotel deals everywhere! I live in a big city that apparently has more restaurants per capita than any other (even New York and LA) in the US, and those places are hopping every night...Are people STILL living on their credit? A dinner for two around where I live with wine or drinks and tip will set you back $150, so are these all still being "written off" by businesses? I know that I was invited to one of these I speak of, about a month ago by a pharmaceutical company doing a presentation on asthma...I did not make it, but it is at a very expensive steak house next door to where I live...It is clear that some have not, as of yet anyway, been hit with this repression uh beginning of a depression... Either that or they are in complete denial...That won't last for long.
Anyway, this picture is representative of my apartments at about this time of night...kinda weird..Well I shall finally retire to my bedroom, read a bit of my Capote book, and then force myself to get up tomorrow morning....Heck, there's ooodooles to do when you don't get to work, and no one is hiring fulltime, and the PRN employees (that's me) get cancelled cause the Hospitals are too slow..damned Global Warming.....Hmm..might just go see another one of the Academy Award contenders for best Film..I only have two more to go...My personal feeling is that performances outdo the actual films that are nominated this year...More about that later, when I have seen enough to give it a thorough critique! Until tomorrow then!
"In the real dark heart of the soul, it is 3:00 in the morning, over and over"...F. Scott's Fitzgerald
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